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To tell or not to tell!



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So I was at the nail shop and I had not been in for about a month... I mention this because people who I haven't told and see me regularly don't know exactly what has changed about me. It's only when they have not seem me week to week or day to day that they say, "Hey have you lost weight." I am good with that.

So anyhoo, I am at the shop and it's rather late and there is just one other woman getting her nails done. She is on the heavy side, (I know the lap band could help her) and my nail woman petite and hungry looking (lol) starts to mention that I have lost so much weight and now she can really tell.

Well I say thanks and begin to talk about something else... but the other woman wants to know how I did it. I am ussually quite forward about the band, especially when it comes to helping someone else...but last night I lied... well sort of.

I just said I ate less and worked out more...which is the truth...but I did not want the nail ladies to know.

I had never experienced that before. I have always been quite honest with how I lost the weight and even proud. But last night... I lied. And now I want to hunt this woman down and tell her, "You can do this too. Hope is not lost... There is a medical cure!"

I was wondering if I was the only one...or do any of you ever go through this. I feel awful for lying. Not to the nail lady...but to the one I could have helped. I know this is my buisness and I don't have to tell if I don't want to, but I would not have had this done had it not been for a woman in the hair shop who told me about it...

I guess I am just feeling guilty!

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Yes!! I do the same thing, some people I tell and some I don't. Just call your nail lady and ask her if she can get that ladies name for you so you can't talk to her about losing weight!! Just a thought!

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Don't feel guilty! You didn't lie, REALLY! I am the same way in that I'm always pretty forward about my band and that it has helped me lose my weight.

BUT........ Should I ever run into the girls that I used to work with at the paper and they begin to ask me how I've done it, I will do exactly what you have done. I will politely smile and say, "I did it with lots of exercise and eating a whole lot less and a lot healthier foods."

I don't feel that it's a lie, because you're telling them the truth, you're just not revealing the part about why you can't eat as much. And it's really none of their business either.

As far as the other heavier lady, I would have felt bad for that too, but trust me, I know just as well as the next person how fast gossip goes around hair shops and the millions of other jobs out there as well. All I had to do was breathe when I worked at the paper and everyone would be rushing up to me with a gazillion questions and gossiping about me behind my back. So don't beat yourself up about that too badly either.

I think that if it's meant to be, you'll see that lady out and about again somewhere and you'll have the chance to talk to her privately where gossipers won't know a thing about it. And then you'll feel glad inside and know that you did the right thing. And if not that lady, then maybe another one day.

Smile, you're OK! :)

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I would not feel guilty,

I now choose when to tell and who. When I meet up with people that I do not see on a daily basis and they comment on how much weight I have lost and how am I doing it I just say Cutting down on food and exercise. But chances are that you all will meet up again and you will have the chance to tell her.

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I thought of another way to approach that issue - tell folks that you lost the weight by eating less and exercising more but you know someone you work with who got the lap band and she had great results. That keeps you from having to answer a lot of ackward questions, but "plants the seed" so to speeak, this way you can inform someone without having to reveal everything about yourself. I know I'm going to be one of those folks who only tells a very select group.

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Thanks for the great advice...I think I just want to find the lady who needed help... Maybe I will run into her again.:)

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