March Bandsters: MASTER THREAD

[ajoneen 0]

WestCoast

I think I hear what you are saying. Ever since the surgery I look at my scars and think "why?". I too did A LOT of research on the subject and was not ready for the feelings that followed. Sometimes when a prebander/newbie asks me about my experience with the band I try to explain the feelings. Not quiet regrets, not inconvenience, but the inner struggle. I don't think there is any way to prepare for it.

You said "I guess I know that I have been doing it without fills for the most part which in a small way helps me feel like I might be able to figure out a way to maintain a healthy lifestyle if I can't find a way to make this work."

With and without fills I think you have found a way to make this work.

Tara- I also feel that my mind is not quite up with my body on how I feel. Body image. You said "I don't know if I want to see what's under this last little bit, or is it more what if I don't like what I find at the end of it all" YES!

I had a certain amount of comfort in my fat body. I knew who I was.

I think losing weight slowly is better then swiftly because there is so much more then your size changing.

I find myself having to take so much more time to wrap my mind around everything.

I thank my stars that I haven't had the BP problems of others.

PS it is amazing how stuff written can be interpreted so differently. :smile2:

[westcoastmom 3]

Thanks everyone for the understanding and empathy. I will have a bit of discussing to do with the staff at my 6 month appointment!

Also - I wanted to say that I wasn't feeling judged - I just wanted to make sure my post came across as self-reflecting and not judgemental. It can be hard to know exactly how things will sound or read on the other end...

Now off to more fun things. Some leprechans need Irish dance lessons.

[nurse niki 0]

Hey Guys! I think this thread it great, and I love to read EVERYTHING, good and bad, that we say about our tool. I think it is healthy for us to hear other people's experience, and it is really important for us to voice our feelings so we can grow during this process!

I just wanted to add one more thing. I know when you are typing on the puter, it is hard to tell the "tone of voice" someone is using. Let me assure anyone who might have gotten the wrong impression from Special K, Kathy is one of the sweetest people I know. (Yes, I am lucky enough to have meet her and develop a friendsship outside of the internet, too) I don't think she would have ever meant to upset someone, and I think she would feel terrible it she thought that someone's feelings were hurt with her comment about honesty! I actually took the comment as encouragement to continue to voice our feelings--no matter what they are at the moment!

Hope everyone has a great LONG weekend!

[SpecialK 22]

I capitalized Honesty in my original post to encourage all of you to post the good, the bad, the ugly, whatever you are honestly feeling because you certainly are not alone in your feelings - there is someone out there who can relate to you and I was encouraging all to say what they need support with.

[ajoneen 0]

looks like we lost Fenton again. Got to put a bell on that guy.

[nycm00 0]

I really hope Fenton finds his way back to us. I miss him.

Fenton, if you are out there...go get a fill. Use the tool. You can do this!

Christine

[lynnt1215 1]

I really hope Fenton finds his way back to us. I miss him.

Fenton, if you are out there...go get a fill. Use the tool. You can do this!

Christine

FENTON- Where R U??? Have you gone to Paris yet?

I am so greatful for this thread. It has been a life line to my band sanity!. Being able to read of each other's sruggles and successes is a boost to knowing I can do better and I am not alone in my journey.

I have been a little down in my losses. Emotionally and in the numbers. Next fill is 9/19, but may try to get in sooner. I fine I have more days of wanting to always be eating than days I am not.

Vacation this past week has been very relaxing :biggrin:. I dread getting back to the work grind next Tuesday. :thumbup:

Have a safe and fun long weekend, to everyone :cursing:

[tarrn13 1]

Let me clairify about what I said, I am not unhappy with my decision to get the band placed, it has made a world of difference since my need for it was not that I ate cheetos 24/7, I ate healthy food, just too much of it. I would not make a different decision if I could turn back the clock and I too did alot of research prior, being a critical care nurse one might say I can be slightly obsessive about things, I just didn't realize how much the weight is connected to my internal stuff. I admit sometimes I misread peoples intonation of things when there is no facial expression to go along with it, every person can read things differently, and sometimes being from a different country figures into that too.

Hope you all have a lovely holiday weekend.

[SpecialK 22]

Charlie (aka Fenton), we miss you!

Wishing everyone a great holiday weekend.

John Forsythe aka Charlie.bmp

[Tess415 1]

Just catching up on the posts this morning before I go and get ready to go to a funeral this morning... my husband's aunt passed away this week after a brave battle with uterine cancer for the past 2 years. Seems like quite a few of us have had to deal with seriously ill family members this summer, my mother-in-law is taking the death better than I thought she would. She has been in terrible health the past few years herself (dialysis, stroke, MS, spinal stenosis, depression just to name a few things). I was afraid what this would do to her, but she is hanging in there, considering she just got out of the hospital this week herself for heart problems now too.

Having said that, I haven't been a very good lapbander this week. I have been off course to say the least. I even got something stuck that I never had happen before my last fill. Ouch! Completely my fault!!!

I don't know if I posted this before but... I wanted to share that I too was very concerned about myself emotionally before the band, it is obvious to me that I medicate myself with food. I've faced this head on even pre-op. I still see a life coach which I found more helpful than a psychologist in this area. While seeing a psychologist for 2 years on and off, it helped to sort things out, and go thru some painful baggage. But, the next step for me was to move forward and take care of myself for once instead of putting everyone else ahead of me. I found better action plans and goals thru my coach, ones that work!!! I am not perfect ( as in this week ) but I now can identify where I get off of track and can make an action plan to get back on track and take control again!!!!

While I understand what some of you are saying about what is under some of us as we lose weight, I wonder if it is more that some of us have used our weight as a buffer between us and life??? I myself make the best use of everything in life, including my fat!! And that buffer is shrinking slowly away!!! The people that I have embraced in my life don't care about my fat, and the fat kept others out or at least at a distance, and those people I didn't concern myself with. Fat, as a protective barrier so to speak. I think this may be the next area for me to discuss with my coach!! I do seem more vulnerable as the pounds disappear, I am not sure about that dynamic, but I am sure it is worth exploring.

Wow, thanks for the therapy!!!! I didn't mean to go on and on and on!! It felt good to share with you all. Have a fantastic weekend!

Take Care !!!! Thanks for listening!!!!

PS. Fenton- I too am concerned about you!!! Have a safe trip to Paris, and let's get back to business after your trip!!! You are suffering from "Bandis-Interruptis"

Edited August 29, 2008 by Tess415

[lynnt1215 1]

I have to agree, we are all emotional, whether with keeping on our weight for whatever reason, or moving forward.

In reflection, I can begin to see my added weight was a barrier for me. I wanted so much to be skinny, but for the wrong reasons.

Now I realize, it is for me only, not for anyone else. Either for a relationship or otherwise.

Yes, the band is the best thing I have ever done for ME. I am healthier and happier within. Now that I know I am a happier, more content person inside, I can begin to work on my other issues. Being single at 54, but that is no major thing. Yes, I would like to find someone special to spend time with, I feel I have alot to offer to others. But do not want to jump on board with anyone, just to be with someone. Do you all understand. Right now, to be happy with myself, my choices and my healthier lifestyle is my beginning. In the future eveything else may fall into place in due time.

Ok, this was my revelation ofmyself. Thanks for letting me express myself.

Everyone have a great Labor Day Weekend. Be safe

[ajoneen 0]

sometimes being from a different country figures into that too.

Where are you from??

[ajoneen 0]

I still see a life coach ... can identify where I get off of track and can make an action plan to get back on track and take control again!!!!

Wow, thanks for the therapy!!!! I didn't mean to go on and on and on!!

Always ready and willing to listen.

I think the idea of a life coach is great. Where did you find yours?

[ajoneen 0]

I feel I have alot to offer to others. [/b]

Yep you do. Thanks for being here on the boards.

[ajoneen 0]

I hope everyone has a wonderful Labor Day weekend.

Im going to try to keep the celebrating to talking and not eating.

Edited August 29, 2008 by ajoneen
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