#3

[donali 57]

Hi All -

I'm Donali (pronounced Donnelly), 42yo female. I've been battling my weight all my life, done ever diet imaginable, and some beyond imagination! lol I was banded as a self-pay in TJ by Dr Lopez on 1/23/03.

My last pre-band diet was a year on Meridia, which really did help with my appetite - I went from 313 to 228 in a year. But, of course, once the medication was over... appetite kicked in, and I got back up to 303. Geez.

My sister had the RNY a few years back - she lost down to a size 18, and is almost back to where she started. She's frantically doing Atkins now. I almost had the RNY because my insurance would pay, but after watching sis regain, and reading more about the risks, I knew I just couldn't do it. My initial reaction to the band was "gross - I don't want that thing in me" until I realized that was my best option. It's not nearly as gross as I thought it would be! lol

My journey is slower than many, because I refuse to "diet" - I am mindful of what I eat, but nothing is off limits. I had 6 months of intensive compulsive overreating counseling, which has been a God send for my self-esteem. It also gave me a lot of tools to deal with my emotions seperate from food. This weekend I was craving M&Ms, so I ate a bunch of those, but that happens very very rarely. I know they're not off limits, so even if I overindulge I do not get down on myself or freak out, because it is so rare for me to do that.

Anyway, I continue to search for sneaky exercise activities - you know, the kind that are fun so you don't realize you're getting exercise. I am still at the point emotionally that I do not want to start a program that I might fail at - the 47 pounds I have lost should never come back as long as I keep my band and this current restriction, as I am just living my life "normally", not doing anything special. Sure, I'd love to lose faster, but not at the risk of all the good counseling work I've done. I'm looking at this as the rest of my life, and trying to focus more on living and not my WEIGHT, which has been an obsession most of my life.

My goals: To be at peace with food. To eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm full. To be good to myself emotionally, and be my biggest supporter! To be the kind of friend to myself that I am to others.

As a side benefit of these goals, I hope to lose another 121 pounds or so. Frankly, I'd be thrilled to reach 185 again - at least for a little while!

I'm filled to 2ccs after my 3rd fill 7/5/03. I am still able to eat a whole sandwich, but just barely. My fills tend to tighten-up after a MONTH, so we'll see how I'm feeling in August. I don't want my intake to be so low that my metabolism is further suppressed - my next big learning curve is trying to increase my metabolism.

Best wishes to everyone!

[Emilie1 3]

I am not banded yet and am a little confused. When do you know when to go on liquids to prevent swelling or irritation? Every time you PB, or only if you PB a bunch? Oh yea, and if you live far away from your surgen, can you get an emergancy unfil at the er?