Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!
$99 Yearly Supply Alert! 🌈 "1 per Day!" Bariatric Multivitamins

Question-adults Only-strong Sexual Content

heather113076

By heather113076, in The Lounge

Recommended Posts

Boo Boo Kitty    3

Boo Boo Kitty
Posted

About 15 years ago had the sweet preacher's wife ask me to go out to dinner with her. Do you know what was on her agenda???????????? She wanted me to tell her how to do it cuz her sweet preacher husband thought that would be a thing he would like. (Not sure why she picked me...must have noticed that my mind was wandering during service). Anyway, after the initial embarrassment, and knowing that I wouldn't be able to keep a straight face as I explained my technique, I told her to practice on a Tootsie Roll Pop. Still to this day I feel like I let her down!

ROTFL...OH MY!!!

But a toostie pop???? lol....She could choke to death....lol..

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Apples2    19

Apples2
Posted

ROTFL...OH MY!!!

But a toostie pop???? lol....She could choke to death....lol..

Appreciate your concern for preacher's wife and the preacher himself. Not sure if she really ever got around to the real thing. But, from that point on, every time I saw her, she had a red tongue.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

WestCoastFatGuy    3

WestCoastFatGuy
Posted

About 15 years ago had the sweet preacher's wife ask me to go out to dinner with her. Do you know what was on her agenda???????????? She wanted me to tell her how to do it cuz her sweet preacher husband thought that would be a thing he would like. (Not sure why she picked me...must have noticed that my mind was wandering during service). Anyway, after the initial embarrassment, and knowing that I wouldn't be able to keep a straight face as I explained my technique, I told her to practice on a Tootsie Roll Pop. Still to this day I feel like I let her down!

On a TOOTSIE ROLL POP? Giirrrrlll, if it isn't at least a banana, then you aren't getting everything that you're entitled to!

Sorry, I couldn't control myself! See what a couple vodka shots in a f*t *ass with a lapband can do! I may be a heavy-weight but when it comes to liquor these days, I'm a LIGHT-weight!

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

WestCoastFatGuy    3

WestCoastFatGuy
Posted

A Tootsie Roll Pop? Oh no, you DID let her down! Don't you remember the little critters on the commercial wanted to know how many licks it took to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? One - Two - Three - CRUNCH... Yup, THREE. Yikes! Did you notice after that the preacher's voice got higher? :wink:

My legs crossed together very tightly when I read this message. Are you a sadist or what???!??? This kind of comment can make a grown man cry! :(

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

WestCoastFatGuy    3

WestCoastFatGuy
Posted

This is in regard to my post above....

Okay.. I feel like a TOTAL *ss now... sweet Kim sent me a PM saying that she is sorry to have offended me. I was NOT offended. I thought it was hilarious!

I keep forgetting that you all can't see my laughing face as I type my posts and don't necessarily know that I am thoroughly amused. Looking back on it, I didn't even use an appropriate Smiley Icon. It should have been jumping up and down and laffing its fool head off!

I'm sorry to have put an unnecessary damper on the party. You can dress me up (sometimes), but obviously... you can't take me out!

I promise to do better next time.

Kimmie... Keep on postin, doll... you're a riot!

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

slimmy120    2

slimmy120
Posted

Has anyone noticed that the port when you lie down pots up or moves when you turn your body, this is embarising if you have a new partner got lap banded in sep 2007, my surgeon says normal and will be more noticeable. Help has anyone had this problem does it change if more or less fill?

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

slimmy120    2

slimmy120
Posted

Checked out the photos,you have done really well so how much weight lost over what periods of time? what are you having done. Noticed i have bad batwing arms at the moment.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Kat817    19

Kat817
Posted

WCFG---it was not the CRUNCH" that made me cringe with the suggestion of using a tootsie roll pop.....it was the way the dang things always cut my tongue! :success1: Is it just me? Do I have particularly caustic saliva????

I HATE tootsie roll pops!!! Yep---I woulda suggested something else to practice on!!

To me, the obvious item to practice on ---- is her DH--he talks, the candy, or the banana---they don't so much!!!! :shades_smile:

As per your post---I utilized the smileys---to show my humor in the thread....LOL:wink2:

Kat

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
Go To Topic Listing The Lounge

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LadyVeteran1

      LadyVeteran1

      Sleeve surgery is on April 14th.  I am counting the days!!  Can't wait!
      · 2 replies
      1. Brookie2shoes

        Brookie2shoes

        Me too girl!! Are you in the full liquid diet right now? It’s sooooo hard!

      2. LadyVeteran1

        LadyVeteran1

        Not yet. I was told I only have to do 24 hours of a liquid diet. But I have my pre-op tomorrow so I’m going to confirm if I need to do longer.

    • buildabetteranna

      buildabetteranna

      Down 33 lbs and slightly stalled, but I'm gonna reevaluate and push through. I started back to work last week after 2 years of being disabled due to mental health as well as my weight. It's a great job and I'm just so happy to have this opportunity at a second chance at life. Hope everyone is having their best journey ❤️ Together, we got this!
      · 2 replies
      1. DaisyChainOz

        DaisyChainOz

        Great work Anna! Keep it up 😁

      2. buildabetteranna

        buildabetteranna

        Thank you ❤️

    • Bashbee91

      Bashbee91

      Hey guys new to the process looking forward to this new life. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Bugg

      Bugg

      Hi everyone! I’m brand new here. I just went through all my pre-op requirements per my insurance company and now everything has been submitted and I’m just waiting for final approval and my surgery date. I’ve been doing research, watching YouTube videos, TikTok’s, ect.. trying to prepare my mind and what to expect so I’ll be ready for the surgery. I was so sure and so set and so ready and excited. However, now that I’ve done everything & it’s almost here, I am sooooooo scared! I know why I want it bc I’ve tried everything and I just don’t feel like I can lose weight by myself. I’m tired of being overweight my entire life. I’m miserable, but I keep psyching myself out afraid of GERD bc I know how that can be and I don’t want to have to get a bypass after already gaining the courage to even get VSG. I’m scared of complications like I’mgoing to regret doing it and be depressed that I didn’t just be more disciplined and try again to lose the weight on my own even sitting here typing this knowing in my mind i just can’t and don’t possess the discipline. I’m also afraid I won’t be able to handle the restrictions of the sleeve. What do I eat? I don’t know how to eat healthy really and don’t enjoy healthy food. I don’t know how to do this! I feel so defeated!Someone tell me they felt anything similar to this or am I not ready? I thought I was. I am so tired of being sick and tired and so tired of myself and so tired of being stuck and stuck in this body and somebody different on the outside from what I feel inside. I just want to ball up and cry.
      · 1 reply
      1. stevieoriole

        stevieoriole

        Am feeling this right now. My surgery date is 4/1. Sign the consent tomorrow. I feel like I overloaded myself with too much info, too many opinions. Got to the point where I was wondering if I should do this. Then I thought of my reasons for taking this step and that settled my nerves. Still get moments of doubt but am striving forward. Am just going to follow my book from the surgeon. Joined this because I was told by my dietician that I should do this for support

    • buildabetteranna

      buildabetteranna

      over 20 lbs down since4 the pre surgery diet and surgery on the 14th
      · 1 reply
      1. Selina333

        Selina333

        Yay!! Congrats. I know how good that feels. 🤩

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    Bariatric Forums

    For Patients

    Health Professionals

    Search Surgeons

    Bariatric Surgeons: Want to research a weight loss surgery surgeon? Enter their last name below to start!

    ×