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I was feeling fine with everything and getting my band in ten days until my friend Karl posted this on my blog: "Just a couple words of advice as I have seen one person that had the lapband surgery and she is NOT following the directions on HOW to eat afterwards and there is not a single visible change in her physical appearance size or weight-wise. It is most important to follow the post operative instructions to gain the maximum effect from this."

This scares me, becuase I have posted a blog to everybody I know that I'm getting this and now I'm scared that I might have sabotaged myself here. What if my willpower goes kaput and I can't do it.. maybe it's just my nerves.. I don't know.. me doubting myself... I have to start my South Beach diet tomorrow and I litterally teared up last night as I ate my last strawberry for a long time.. I am seriously mourning food.. I feel sort of depressed here and I never get depressed.. :biggrin:

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Cool, what you are going through now is what we ALL went through!! Believe me! Having a surgery like this is a serious matter and is life changing for sure! So your nerves are justified iin being jangled!

The beauty of the band is that you won't have to rely on pure willpower alone anymore! I'd say that it's half and half now. The band does half the work and your head does the other half.

Mourning food is very, very natural! But seriously, you get over it! The freedom and new control that you feel are simply amazing. Yes, there will be some days when you get out of control but you'll eat 3 Cookies instead of 40....or you'll choose enchiladas instead of a green salad. But you'll only be able to eat one enchilada instead of 3!! ....and you'll be okay with that.

The other thing I felt very helpful is to read a motivational book.... One that helped me a lot was [ame=http://www.amazon.com/This-Year-Will-Finally-Resolution/dp/0767920082]"This Year I Will..." by MJ Ryan[/ame]. She's awesome and so is the book. Lots and lots of food for thought and will help you understand how your brain works when going thru a major change in behavior. I highly suggest it.

The other thing to keep in mind is that when polled, 92% of the users here said they had no regrets and would get banded again. So you have a 92% chance that you will feel the same way!! Those are pretty darn good odds.

Good luck! Hang around LBT...a lot....and it will help immensely.

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Guest nicenurse

hi, my daughter and i are having the lap band and going thru the same thing, wondering if we shoiuld do thr by pass

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Ok first off the decision belongs to you guys about what surgery if any your going to have. Just some fact. Lapband is safer. If you are mourning food then just know you will beable to eat it again with the lapband. With the band as long as you remember to chew and eat very slow you can probably have a little of this and a little of that just in moderation. This is what we have been told all our lives right moderation. The lapband just helps you force that. You also have to make sure you get your fills cause thats part of the lapband. Yes you can eat around the lapband but if you do that then you have wasted your time and money. Just eat in moderation. Look at your lables and make smart choices and the lapband will work fine for you. Hope this helps and i didn't ramble on to much

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You can sabotage bypass too. I have a friend who lost over 100 lb with a bypass and gained it all back. Now she wants lapband, but the doctors have said her stomach is too messed up to do it. Personally, I think she would fail at lap band too. She Snacks constantly and never gets out of her chair all day long.

The band gives you the ability to cut down drastically on food quantity, but it doesn't stop you from eating ice cream and Cookies. For me, it also stops cravings that last for more than a bite or two. Yesterday I fell off the bandwagon and went out to eat barbecue, then had ice cream for dessert. But I couldn't eat 3/4 of the meal, and have no further cravings for the 2/3 of a pint of ice cream that I have left this morning, so I threw it out.

You have to work your band and understand how to help it. If you go into this process believing that the band will magically make you skinny, it ain't gonna happen.

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I see you say you are depressed, starting South Beach and not eating a strawberry for a very long time...

Well, once banded you'll be eating strawberries. Really there isn't much you can not eat. But the strawberry seems like it's a metaphor for all the ways you ate before. You are sad because those ways are not going to be available to you and the comfort those ways gave you isn't going to come. That is very sad indeed. But those same eating behaviors are the ones that have made you obese.

The logic follows change the behavior, change the outcome. But logic doesn't feel the same as emotion.

The process of getting the band disrupts all of that emotion/logic stuff. All that gets put on hold and you can exhale, catch your breath and really think about how you and food work together. You are adding a new mechanism into the mix and it really does change things. Physically you are just not as hungry. And emotionally you've added many things, Like 'I've had surgery to change, I'm not going back! And I can't go back unless I try really hard.'

I'm rambling...my point is, Yeah this is hard but so worth the work. And if it were easy everyone would do it. And even some people go through the effort of having surgery but not the work of changing their behavior or thinking and they are the ones who are not successful.

You will be successful.

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I see you say you are depressed, starting South Beach and not eating a strawberry for a very long time...

The process of getting the band disrupts all of that emotion/logic stuff. All that gets put on hold and you can exhale, catch your breath and really think about how you and food work together. You are adding a new mechanism into the mix and it really does change things. Physically you are just not as hungry. And emotionally you've added many things, Like 'I've had surgery to change, I'm not going back! And I can't go back unless I try really hard.'

I'm rambling...my point is, Yeah this is hard but so worth the work. And if it were easy everyone would do it. And even some people go through the effort of having surgery but not the work of changing their behavior or thinking and they are the ones who are not successful.

You will be successful.

Thanks Juli!

Actually, I'm on day 4 of the South Beach diet and as of first thing this morning I've lost 5 pounds! It's actually not as hard as I thought it would be. And I feel wonderful! The first two days was very hard and I cheated and ate ONE grape, but so far, so good.. I've been eating grilled chicken, spring lettuce salads, green Beans, string cheese, sugar free Jello, pistachios, eggs, turkey bacon and more. It's pretty amazing! And I have so much energy...

Everybody has always been pretty supportive on this forum and I'm very thankful for that. You all have helped me to believe in myself and told me I could do it, and so far I am.. since I have been doing good on this diet, I know I can do good on the lap band.. I just needed that extra push is all.

Nicenurse - I beg you to rethink the bypass. Two dear friends of mine both had the bypass and one is back up to 350 and the other is about 230 and they both are stuck with 'dumping" issues for the rest of their life and still obese. Even the worse possible thing that could happen with the band is better than the stuff they are having to still deal with right now... the dumping is only a little of it... and if you are curious what dumping is, as my friend explained it to me last week, she said that even if she jsut has a little piece of cake, she has to run to the tiolet and has the runs really quick.. like the sugar just goes right through her..

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I have finally felt real restriction at my second fill, stopping me from eating too much. But you don't have to mourn food, that is the good thing about the band, you can eat regular food in moderation. Even a piece of chocolate now and then.

In fact, had a small piece of ice cream cake from Carvel today and felt the restriction after about 5 bites. Am I upset? Absolutely not. I had some ice cream, and felt satisfied, instead of sitting there watching others enjoy it and wishing for it. I got my small taste of it and the craving is over.

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I firmly believe that you must be ready for this surgery both physically as well as emotionally. If you truly want to change your life forever, and do what it takes to make those changes last, then the band will be a tool to assist you in those endeavors.

But if you just want a quick fix to your life long struggle with obesity then you will most likely not succeed. I have two people that I work with who both had RNY one fours ago and one 3 years ago. They are both gaining back their weight, one has already topped her highest weight and the other one has regained 50 pounds. Y you ask? Because they refused to eat with the pouch. You cannot overeat ever again with WLS. This means you cannot choose to eat over the size of your pouch if you do, you will sabotage the whole process.

They eat enormous amounts of food again. I can hardly believe it , when I am sitting there with my measly three ounces of food. Sad to say but they know they are doing it.

WLS is not a bandaid to cover up our emotional eating problems, it will not repair them at all......we have to do this all on our own. We have to work through those issues as to what makes us eat when we are NOT hungry.

I have not had any real hunger since being banded....and I have not had a FILL yet. I am one of the few.....but happy!!

Whatever choice you make......go with it and let no one deter you from your goal. Let no one sabotage your effort......the band will help you reach every goal you set.......but you are the one in control NOT the band!!

Good Luck with your adventure!! We are all here for you.

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Isn't it awesome when you actually begin to lose pounds?? I mean, I couldn't get a pound to come off to save my life before and now my Band is just my miracle!!

When I hit a plateau, which has happened a few times (like right now), I just come into here to my "friends" and get all the encouragement I need to continue doing all the right things for me--and not to go down that old road again.

Isn't LBT just the best?!!! :cursing:

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First of all, and I would let Karl (your 'friend')I don't know if Karl is a banded person or not, but it is a really, really wrong thing to critique another persons progress (or lack thereof) That is the biggest issue with bandsters - that nobody seems to understand that the band gives SLOW GRADUAL weight loss - it is designed that way. Everyone is used to gastric bypass, and when they don't see band patients losing like GB patients their first thought is that the band isn't working. He doesn't say whether the failures he is reporting are people who were banded a year ago or six months ago. I suppose to many outsiders (ignorant people who don't understand how the band works) I look like a failure. I had surgery 10/26/07 and still don't look visibly different. I have only lost 18 pounds. That is because my doctor is very conservative with fills and I never felt any restriction whatsoever until my 4th fill, which was three months after surgery. To me, losing 18 pounds in four months is nothing short of a miracle. I have never been able to lose that much weight in that time before. I am absolutely thrilled over every single one of those pounds! And all it takes to totally burst my happiness bubble is a buzzkill like Karl making an insensitive comment like he made. Karl needs to worry about Karl, not about how other people are doing. Don't let comments like he made sway you in your decision to have this surgery. If you follow all the instructions your doctor gives you and are committed to working this thing, you will succeed. You can be assured (once you reach proper restriction) of losing 5-10 pounds a month if you faithfully do what you are supposed to do. The band works in such a way that it is easier to do what you need to do. As you read the posts on this sight you can always find people who are losing twice as much weight as you and people who are losing half as much as you. Some of the non-losers are not losing because they aren't following the program. Some of them are just not where they need to be yet. But all of them are human beings who have had a lot of crap thrown at them already in their lives because of being overweight and this sight should be a place where they get encouragement and support. Please don't be discouraged or fearful about the band working, just have realistic expectations. And maybe find a new friend! (sorry Karl!)

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Crystal,

Right after before my pre-op appointment, I started to go through the quite a sad stage, then I didn't want to go through the "last meal" phase, and that lasted a few days I felt even worse. It was the fear of the unknown, the fear of never pigging out again on the "good stuff", and I realized that my life will not be over, I will be gradually be reborn. We have the same surgery date, and I have only a 2 day pre-op diet, I'm not freaking out anymore, I just want the 25th to come. I know that once I taste success of more than 5-10 pounds, I will want more. And I can deal with that, it just getting there. We can be buddies, pm me if you'd like.

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Everyone is used to gastric bypass, and when they don't see band patients losing like GB patients their first thought is that the band isn't working. He doesn't say whether the failures he is reporting are people who were banded a year ago or six months ago. I suppose to many outsiders (ignorant people who don't understand how the band works) I look like a failure. I had surgery 10/26/07 and still don't look visibly different. I have only lost 18 pounds. That is because my doctor is very conservative with fills and I never felt any restriction whatsoever until my 4th fill, which was three months after surgery. You can be assured (once you reach proper restriction) of losing 5-10 pounds a month if you faithfully do what you are supposed to do. The band works in such a way that it is easier to do what you need to do. As you read the posts on this sight you can always find people who are losing twice as much weight as you and people who are losing half as much as you. Please don't be discouraged or fearful about the band working, just have realistic expectations. And maybe find a new friend! (sorry Karl!)

Thank you so much! no, Karl is not banded, but the group of friends I have are mostly obese people, so a lot of us have had WLS of some kind or are thinking about it. I keep telling people that this isn't like the bypass and that I would be happy with 4-5 pound a month weight loss. But, on me, it will be hard to really see a difference until I get down like 35 pounds or so.. I just hope nobody starts asking why it doesn't look to be working or something.

Crystal,

Right after before my pre-op appointment, I started to go through the quite a sad stage, then I didn't want to go through the "last meal" phase, and that lasted a few days I felt even worse. It was the fear of the unknown, the fear of never pigging out again on the "good stuff", and I realized that my life will not be over, I will be gradually be reborn. We have the same surgery date, and I have only a 2 day pre-op diet, I'm not freaking out anymore, I just want the 25th to come. I know that once I taste success of more than 5-10 pounds, I will want more. And I can deal with that, it just getting there. We can be buddies, pm me if you'd like.

Thanks Valvinnek!! I've been really happy on the South Beach diet and finding cool recipes. Last night I made the best spinach egg quiche my husband has ever tried apparently and there are so many other meals.. it's pretty amazing! That's so cool we have our banding dates to be the same. I'll have to look at your ticker to see what you are starting with.. (weight wise).

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Cool just wanted to say, the 2nd thoughts are normal. They will likely double after your surgery, before you get adequate restriction. But anywhere from 2-6 months post-op when your fills are kicking in, 92% chance you'll be pretty darn happy. This forum is key for me in success. Anytime I feel like I'm doing things wrong, or am just down right discouraged, there's people here to support you.

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My surgery is in two days and I"m feeling pretty good about it. My pregnant and banded friend Dawn even sent me flowers with a wonderful message on it telling me good luck. All of my family and friends have been pretty supportive, so a few are scared I'm going to die (they keep thinking about the bypass horror stories) and so forth, but other than that, they have been great.

I have been very impressed with this south beach diet my doc put me on. My husband wanted to do it with me and my sister got interested in it too and she has already lost 4 pounds in a few days and I've lost like 9 pounds since last saturday.. and my hubby has lost the same. I feel good.. and lighter and happier already. I'm ready to do this!

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