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sex drive??



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Hi all,

Anyone have any ideas to rescue a libido that's been killed off by anti-depressants? This is a problem I've been dealing with for quite a long time, but I thought I'd bring it up to my new "cyber friends" (I was banded 11/2/07 and doing well with that).

A little history: I have been playing musical medications for depression for about 7 years, and being sexually dysfunctional the vast majority of that time. The combination of drugs I am on right now (Lexapro, Seroquel, Wellbutrin) has the depression largely at bay, but the complete lack of sex drive is so pronounced that I wouldn't care if I ever had sex again. I love my husband with all my heart and we don't have marital problems. I feel so badly for him that I could cry. He's pretty good about it most of the time, but I know it bothers him a great deal - and who could blame him? He's only 35 (I'm 37) and in a very low-sex marriage. I try to "take care of him" as often as I can, but don't feel like doing that either. But I DO try to make the effort.

It's like I can be turned on in my head, but the connection between my brain and my "privates" is disconnected.

Hopefully this was not TMI for anyone. If anyone has suggestions or (God willing) SOLUTIONS, I would love to hear them.

Thanks in advance,

Robin

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Oh yeah - see lots of people going off their antideps to avoid this issue, which is a really bad idea. Here's part of an article you may find helpful:

Get the Zing Back

You may find that the sexual side effects improve within 4 to 6 months of beginning the antidepressant as your body adapts to the medication. If not, here are the most effective strategies to kick things up a notch and still effectively treat your depression.

Add an antidepressant that increases dopamine. This helps rebalance the neurotransmitters. Dr. Rosenberg recommends Wellbutrin (buproprion) or Remeron (mirtazapine). Serzone (nefazodone) is another option, but there are concerns about liver toxicity.

Switch to an antidepressant known to have fewer sexual side effects such as, again, Wellbutrin. (A new antidepressant called Cymbalta-expected to receive FDA approval late this year or in early 2003-may offer another choice.) This can be tricky, according to Dr. Rosenberg, because your depression may not respond as well to another medication as it does to your current one.

Ask your doctor if you can gradually reduce your dosage since sexual side effects are dosage related. Dr. Rosenberg cautions that reducing your dosage may cause a relapse of the depression.

Talk to your doctor about Viagra if your antidepressant causes a delay in or leaves you unable to have an orgasm. There's evidence that it helps some women with this SSRI-induced problem.

You may want to try the herbal supplement ginkgo. Case reports and a few studies showed it to be somewhat effective. Dr. Rosenberg recommends 120 mg twice a day.

Mention it to your doctor. I know it can be personal/embarassing, but I promise you're not the first one to ask about it. Probably not event he first person that day. :eek:

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Wheetsin,

Thanks for your quick response and advice. Unfortunately...

*I have been on my current combo. of drugs for over a year, so I don't hold out much hope that the side effects will correct themselves.

*I already take 2 of the 3 dopamine-increasing drugs mentioned.

*I tried Viagra and all it gave me was a bad headache!

*I've discussed the problem with my Dr. ad nauseum. That's one of the reasons I've tried so many different drugs - to try and find something that doesn't cause this side effect AND allows me to act like a human being! We've obviously not found the answer.

I've never tried the gingko. It's worth a go. I had already decided this morning to decrease my dose of the Lexapro to see what happens. My husband is usually pretty good at spotting if I start growing horns and need to increase it again!

Thanks again for the effort. What else ya' got???????

Robin

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Robin, the only thing I could suggest would be to try Celexa instead of Lexapro-but sounds like you might have already done that. For me, that has been the antidepressent with the fewest side effects, including lack of sex drive/ability to orgasm.

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My sex drive actually RETURNED after getting on Wellbutrin .

Hubby and i had some marriage problems abotu 4 yrs ago and we had NO Sex life , im talking MAYBE 3 times a yr , add that on top of my PCOS and weight and mild depression and I could have cared less.

I got on Wellbutrin and BOY HOWDY did that change and the more weight I loose the more my sex drive is amped up !

So def, talk to your doc see what he can recommend

HTH

Mindy

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sorry i did not read the well enough . have you thought about something like Acupunture ?

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uh....porn movies?? :biggrin: Works for me! (shhhhhhhhhh...it's a secret)

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i concur...try porn...and toys. my dh bought me a small vibrator type thing that slips on his/my finger...small to start, nothing scary...it has adjustable speeds and different sleeves you can put on it...different textures...worked great. while i hadnt entirely lost my interest in sex on cymbalta, i had lost my ability to orgasm for some time.

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Odd as it may sound, I've also heard (and experienced) that having sex can increase your sex drive. Waiting until you are "in the mood" may not be the right answer, because you might never "feel" in the mood, but you might enjoy yourself once you get started.

My husband and I also have a 'porn and toy' collection. We don't use them all the time, but sometimes when we want to "make a night of it". :unsure:

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Yep I agree with Marimaru-------the more ya get-------the more ya want!!

For a set amount of time make sex part of your schedule. Do your best to enjoy it--use lubrication as needed--the theory behind this is, that once you trigger the reaction, it kicks itself back in.

My best friend has the issue--and she has done all of the above---toys--movies (which btw Terry--she give me a word to the wise--avoid porn on the big screen TV, she says there are just some things you do not need to see on a 60" screen!!!!!) And then the Dr. had her try the prescription sex!

She said she does think it triggered something in her-but also her DH got off her back about getting some, and since he was happy about getting it often, he picked up his feet and began doing things that she believes might have also helped trigger. She said they suddenly found a reason to have sex again whether her mind and body were always in it together or not.

Kat

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If my husband and I don't have sex in more than 3 or 4 days, I make sure to initiate, because we've had the "You never initiate" conversation, and I told him I'd make a point of it if he didn't. Even if I'm not in the mood particularly, we can have at least a quickie before bed.

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Thanks everyone, for the suggestions. I reduced the amount of Lexapro I take, so we'll see if that makes a difference. I'm sure my husband would be on board with the suggestions of having MORE sex to kickstart things!

Thanks again, all of you.

Robin

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