Why are YOU Fat?

[BJean 16]

This is me to a tee!

I switched to a mostly whole foods way of eating while I was pregnant with my first over 7 years ago, so that I would have those habits well in place when she was born. My kids have really great eating habits and love healthy food as much as I do. And fortunately, they have Portion Control.< /p>

I don't.

I can sit down and eat half a baked chicken, 2-3 cups of brown rice, and at least 2 cups of broccoli in one sitting, no problem. I can down an entire bag of puffed wheat and half a quart of milk, a huge bowl of oatmeal, or an 8-egg omelette without batting an eye. I can easily eat a couple of pounds of sashimi, most of a wok-ful of stir-fry, or a healthy salad meant to serve an entire family with leftovers. And then I can do it again within an hour or two, easy.

Between my kids, I took off 100# through diet and exercise alone. I did WW, but completely failed at their no-points "Core" program because my portions were so out of whack. By counting points and being hungry ALL the time, I eventually whittled off the weight.

It took me 3 years, and I was hungry and miserable every day. I got pregnant again, and put back on most of it. My appetite increased with breastfeeding and I put back on the rest. The idea of going through all that AGAIN brings me to tears. The idea of being hungry for the rest of my life brings me to my knees.

So, while I was on the fence for the last several months about getting banded, I have decided that I am going to take this step. I have been ultra-compliant through my 90-day diet and am continuing it until we go on vacation next week. I'll try to keep things sane while on vacation, but won't be able to track with any sort of accuracy. Then, when I get back after Memorial Day, I start back with my pre-op diet for two weeks.

I'm scared, but I think it's the right choice for me at this time. I've already made all the other right decisions relating to food for myself and my family. I just want some help in tackling this last obstacle.... the portions. The band looks to be the perfect tool to do that with me.

You and Leigha have at least learned to eat good food. Maybe the band is really the best answer for you. It was not for me. If you have lots of determination and will power and conviction, I have no doubt that you can make it work for you. I sure didn't have those things and they are absolutely necessary with the band - that and exercise.

My best wishes to you for amazing success.

(Anybody besides me looked forward to pregnancy so they could gain weight with abandon?)

[sarah723 0]

I don't even know the name of it or the channel it was on. I didn't know that it had more than one episode. I want to get the courage to watch it, but I may not be ready so soon after the surgery. But do you mind telling me the name of it and I can do a search and Tivo it?

BJean, Ruby comes on the Style Network.

[BJean 16]

Thanks Sarah!

[MaggieGT 0]

Hello Again,

I'm kind of scared.:smile:

I had tough last 3 weeks of my masters course. No exercise and I ate junk food, grandmas sandwich Cookies, donettes, diet coke. I've gained 7# since my lowest.

Now I can't seem to turn it off. Why is it junk food goes down fine with the band. :smile2:

Todays Plan:

I'm going to get up from my desk every hour, work out at lunch and 2 hours afterwork. Hopefully that will get me back on track.

Any suggestions??

Good Journey,

Maggie

[BJean 16]

Hello Again,

I'm kind of scared.:thumbup:

I had tough last 3 weeks of my masters course. No exercise and I ate junk food, grandmas sandwich Cookies, donettes, diet coke. I've gained 7# since my lowest.

Now I can't seem to turn it off. Why is it junk food goes down fine with the band. :biggrin:

Todays Plan:

I'm going to get up from my desk every hour, work out at lunch and 2 hours afterwork. Hopefully that will get me back on track.

Any suggestions??

Good Journey,

Maggie

Oh man, do I!!!!

Maggie your plan for today is the best thing you can do. Get moving! And remember carbs, especially simple carbs, i.e., junk food, will always go down easier than real food with the band. The doc said that the reason for that is because junk food is loaded with fats and they break down quicker beginning in your mouth. So by the time they hit your band restriction they are already mushier than foods that take longer to breakdown and subsequently digest.

And very importantly, remember that carbs are addictive. The more you eat them, the more you crave them. They're toxic and they cause you to retain Water because your body is trying to dilute them. Eating them is so totally counter productive to your plan.

And last but not least, you must love yourself and care about yourself and be good to yourself. If you're using self-destructive behavior, it is because you aren't caring enough about YOU.

We get distracted with outside crapola, like stressing over exams, friend or spouse disagreements, too much work piling up, sadness, whatever! But what we have to do is separate those things from how we manage our health and beauty.

You are worth the effort to wean yourself off the simple carbs again. Do your best to eat Protein first. Get all your water in. And love yourself. Not necessarily in that order.

Take it from someone who's done it all wrong and now is getting it right - take care of yourself baby, you're the only one you have and you're totally worth it. If you love yourself everyone else will too and everything begins to fall into place when you put yourself first!

[MaggieGT 0]

Thank you, Bjean.

[BJean 16]

You're sure welcome. I just noticed you're from Tulsa - my former hometown.

And I noticed that you've done really well with the band and you're getting your master's. What an accomplished woman! You should be very proud!

[HiMow 0]

your advice was great and very helpful. But, I have to say, a lot of people would agree that carbs are not toxic, and people should eat the right kind of carbs in moderation.

[BJean 16]

Well I certainly agree that complex carbs are not toxic and in fact, we need them to have a well-balanced diet.

What I meant to say was that the very simple carbs, the junk foods like candy, Cookies, cake, jellies, jams, sugery drinks, etc., are often toxic to our bodies. We can use some of the highly refined sugar for energy but otherwise, they aren't good for anything and in fact, can be toxic and addictive.

Too much of anything, even if it is a good food can be toxic in the wrong quantities, like meat, milk, eggs, chicken, and porky the pig.

So I think what I am trying to say is that a well-balanced meal plan, that includes everything but the highly refined simple carb junk foods, are not only good for us but the answer to having a very healthy body.

Wish me luck. I'm someone who has existed for years on junk foods and I am definitely an addict. So I'm working hard to not only figure it out but I'm trying desperately to get healthy and happy. I know I deserve better than to stuff myself with crap just because I'm unhappy, happy, alone or with too many people or any other temporary mental state whre I've allowed myself to justify eating like a hog or a goat.

[djbabe 0]

I am starting to think maybe I am a food addict. I think about food all the time and I eat for all kinds of reasons, hunger, cravings, boredom the list goes on and on. Something I am going to have to investigate for myself.

Lisa,

I KNOW I am a food addict which I why I got a band...the alternative was sewing my mouth shut and I am hesitant to think that even that would work. I still think about food all the time - now I just can't eat like it. I have the same issues as you: hunger, boredom, depression, hate my looks, cravings without the pregnancy to take the blame, you name it and I have it. I never did recreational drugs, not a big drinker as an adult but set a pizza down in front of me and sister, keep your feet and hands inside the car or they may be in jeopardy.

My mom blames herself. Says if she hadn't fed us "boarding house" style then I wouldn't have these issues....I tell her all the time that that is BS. I finished my plate because there where starving kids in Africa....whatever. I ate because I wanted to, loved the taste and instant gratification, the ceremony of dinner out etc. Not my mom's fault, I would blame genetics maybe but not that she made me dinner at night.

Didn't mean to ramble. Best of luck to you on your new journey!

[ngory07 22]

My mother died when I was three of a Heroin overdose. I was sent to live with my gradparents. Everytime I cried about my mom they would feed me. Then my dad died when I was 8 and again when I was sad they would feed me. I was sent to a boarding school at 6 where I was raped by a worker and I again got feed instead of getting therapy. food has always been there for me. When everyone leaves food is still there.

[BJean 16]

You're saying that food is the drug that you used to feel better. I know that feeling. That was true for me as well. However it got to the point where it was harming me so much I had to do something or die.

I finally decided that I care about myself. It finally doesn't matter whether anyone else cares about me or not. I care about myself. I want to be healthy and happy and food no longer could do that for me. So I'm giving it up and I have never felt better about anything in my life.

[StrangeDz 1]

My mother died when I was three of a Heroin overdose. I was sent to live with my gradparents. Everytime I cried about my mom they would feed me. Then my dad died when I was 8 and again when I was sad they would feed me. I was sent to a boarding school at 6 where I was raped by a worker and I again got feed instead of getting therapy. food has always been there for me. When everyone leaves food is still there.

That's the saddest story I've ever heard (read)... :tt1:

[anthonynelson 0]

I am fat because i have excessive drinking habits!!! And i am here to get motivated to slow down on it.

[Tazwella 39]

:thumbdown:im fat because i over eat.

dont exercise enough.

hate healthy food.< /span>

This is so me. But I can add "I can't stand to feel deprived". I'm so glad this thread is here. I've read almost all 50+ pages and it's helped me to understand my own weirdness. :biggrin:

I got my band in 2006 and originally lost 36 pounds. I was 206 at my highest, but had diabetes, high bp and high cholesterol all caused by my weight. But I never really understood the reasons why I got fat to start with. I thought the band would be a miracle cure that wouldn't require me to do anything. I was wrong.

I found ways to eat around my band because I would think it wasn't fair to be deprived if I wanted something. I'm not sure where that came from. I'm sure it has to do with growing up without much or not having a father. Whatever. The statute of limitations on that ran out a long time ago and I need to deal with this problem I've created.

I got unfilled while I was pregnant in 2008 and just haven't had the heart to get it tightened much since. I'm angry sometimes that I can't just eat what I want. It's not fair. That's the whole deprivation thing I guess.

I'm going back to my doctor on Tuesday 9/28/10 to find out how I can start over. I want to learn it the right way this time. I have a 2 year old now and I'm a single mom and I want to be around for him since I'm all he has.

Good luck to you all!

Stacey

Edited September 26, 2010 by tazwella