Why are YOU Fat?

[SarahinTyler 0]

This was the best thread that I've read so far. I'm new to this site and just discovered it the other day and I can't keep myself off of it.

I'm planning on getting banded this summer and I've always wondered if the band could help me because I'm (like all of you) are an emotional eater. I've dwelled on my weight since elementary school (I'm now 46). I could identify with so much of everyone's story.

I was a pudgy kid and my brother and sister teased me all the time. I guess I learned to turn to food for comfort and it became my friend (even though I've always had lots of people friends). And it has been my friend ever since.

I've worried whether or not the band could help an emotional eater like myself but as I read your stories, I see that there is hope out there for me and that I can do this with the help of the people on this site. I have a three year old and I don't want her growing up with a fat Mom and thinking that it's okay to be fat. I don't want her to grow up with the turmoil that I've felt all these years. Nor do I want her to lose her Mom at an early age because I developed one of the diseases that goes along with being Severely Obese. So I'm praying that the band will help me.

Sarah

not banded yet

current weight 193

5'3"

goal 120 something (never have been there)

[Deewillbethin 0]

ok, here it goes....

I grew up chubby and my lovely sister always called me fatty and other caring and thoughtful words a sibling might say. I guess I took it literelly and made her words truthful. Even when in high school I was wearing her size 5 jeans. But that didn't last long because after she would call me fatty again, I would bloat back up to my chubby self. I allowed her words to dictate how I was going to look and feel about myself.

It is sad that when growing up I was never told that I was a great person no matter how much weight I had on me. I wish I could have been stronger and had some self esteem.

I hate blaming others for my misfortune and I am the only one to blame first of all for stuffing my face and secondly for believing the lies others were saying to me and making what they said, "truthful".

:think

[Maggie63 0]

evertime i come to this thread i become so emotional....i read your stories and look at my own life stories.....how we got where we are today....it is no wonder we are still standing!!!

but we are still standing and have long lives to live. saraintyler, joyceGA and others...i can not tell you what to do, but i believe the band can help you get where you need to be. i was an emotional eater big time!!!!! the band has stopped that for me, the bottom line is, if i try to eat too much, i get sick, so i stop. it is the first time in a decade that i feel like i have control over what i eat. it has literally saved my life!!!!

best of luck to all of you...feel free to pm me if you have any particular questions or just need to talk : )

[JenWillwin 0]

I started getting heavy right before I got married and it was in conjunction with symptoms of polycystic ovarian syndrome. I dont know whether getting PCOS helped me pack on weight or packing on weight gave me symptoms of PCOS. Doctors dont even really know for sure.Add that to my parents divorcing a few years later. The icing on the cake is when I quit smoking 1 year ago. So I have managed to gain about 140 pounds in 7 years. I feel better losing 20 pounds and not smoking then I did when I smoked and was about 50 pounds lighter than I am now.:violin:

[time4change 0]

Because I just went to grab a few do-si-do's before sitting down to type this!

:phanvan

I was always a bit chunky as a kid, wearing size 14-16 by the end of high school. At 5'10", I was about 180 for my wedding. After a few years of marriage, I was close to 200. Then began my struggle with infertility. Three years worth of hormones and other ovarian stimulants, I was about 225 when I finally got pregnant. After a few years more, I could not get my weight under 235, and I did another IVF cycle. Got pregnant with triplets. To feed my flock during pregnancy, I was encouraged to eat alot. So, of course, I did! How nice to eat without guilt!! LOL! Well, after that pregnancy, I have not been under 245, and am currently..... 260. :omg:

I am sick and tired of always dieting. And never losing more than a few pounds, then gaining it back. I cringe at the thought of living the rest of my life this, guilty, embarassed, ashamed, stressed and depressed. So, if I can get insurance approval, I am going for it!

Jen

[syber 0]

Most people here have faced the loss and gains repeatedly over the years. If there is one thing learned is that as hard as you try, you can loose the weight but it will, always come back. I do not think the fight is against weight but rather the fight is against your body or your brain. Your body, your brain has it's own idea as to what your weight should be and if nothing else, it has proved itself effective in beating you every time at the weight loss game.

In most other aspects regarding ones body, Genetic make up plays a crucial role in development and disease. The maintaining of a constant state of over weight may be one more thing attributable to genetics. IT is not to hard to believe that one person may metabolize fats and carbs differently then the next person.

Obesity has been found in certain Indian families and Hawaiian families further proof of genetic findings. The foods you eat play a role but in so far as keeping it off the fight is against your own body and your body usually wins. That's why the band is so useful, it leads your body to think is is the weight it should be.

[divanita2006 0]

I eat more, and move less. I often put other's needs ahead of my own. I end up eating late at night. l usually eat big portions. I don't eat often enough. I take lots of meds that add extra weight, or make me hungry.

I like exercise, but after working out for months at a time and losing 10 lbs, I get discouraged. I feel blessed to have the opportunity to have the band as my helper, my tool.

[mommy2kai 0]

Wow, what an amazing thread! Everyone's story is so moving and inspiring!

My mom was a single parent, and I think part of my problem began as a child. She let me eat pretty much whatever and whenever I wanted. I was never very active as a kid, I preferred playing with my Barbies or reading a book over riding my bike. But despite my mom letting me have free reign of the fridge, she was hyper critical of me. She started putting me on diets at around age 7 or 8. 'You have such a pretty face', or, 'if you lose weight, I'll buy you a whole new wardrobe', she'd say. Other times, the comments were mean. When we went to pick out my first training bra (oh the horror!!), I found a nice, stretchy one that looked comfortable. Best of all, it was one size fits all. I showed it to my mom who looked at me in disgust and said, 'it says one size fits all- not one size fits all elephants!'

I began to slim down some as I went into junior high, and I noticed that the boys were beginning to take notice! I wanted to lose more weight, so in my freshman year, I began taking speed. I dropped another 35 lbs quickly (amazingly, mom didn't notice!), and I somehow managed to keep an A average despite being in a daze and sniffling like a coke fiend all day. This was back in the '80s, and I was doing the '20-minute workout' everyday, and working out with Richard Simmons on his tv-show every morning as well.

After high school, I began working, and was living on fast food, and beer and a ton of mixed drinks on the weekends. My weight would yo-yo up and down, and I'd try any fad diet that came along, because mom was still harping on me that I was fat. At one point (when I was about 35lbs over my ideal weight), she asked me if I was pregnant. WTH?! Anyway, I met Mr.Mommy2Kai, and we got married.

I lost about 25 lbs before our wedding, and then started gaining about 10 lbs for every year we've been married, which has been 11 years. I'm an emotional eater, and Lord knows we've had a lot of stress in our marriage. When I'm upset, I calm myself with food. Food has been my best friend for many years; it's been much better to me than drugs or booze have ever been. And, I don't exercise like I used to. A couple of months ago, I joined Curves and I've gone two times. I'm using the excuse of 'I don't have time! I don't want to get sweaty on my lunch hour/before work/after work!' I'm so busy taking care of Mr.M2K, and my son Kai that I don't ever feel like I have time for me.

At any rate, I'm ready to tell food that it can't be my best friend anymore. Oh, it can be a part of the big celebrations in life, but they won't be centered around food. And it will be there to sustain me and keep me healthy, but it's not going to be my therapist anymore. I want to see my son grow and get married and have his family, and maybe even stick around to see their family! I want to grow old with Mr.M2K, because he'd miss my nagging!

I go to my seminar on May 20, next Saturday. I'm hopeful that after that, I can get in to Dr. Malley soon, and begin my first steps on my journey to reclaim myself.

[jojo41 0]

What a great thread!

I am fat beacause I LOVE food.< /p>

I am fat because I rarely exercise.

I am fat because I eat when I'm bored.

I am fat beacause I eat when I'm stressed.

I am fat beacause I eat when I'm happy.

I am fat because genetically I'm not "blessed" with "skinny genes"....both parents are fat as so are most of my relatives.

I am fat because I love going to restaurants often.

I am fat because being of Italian heritage food is considered a big priority in my family, I can still hear my mama and nonna "manga,manga" (eat,eat) or "have some more!".

I am fat because I have no idea about Portion Control.< /p>

I am fat beacause I think about food morning, noon and especially at night.

I am fat beacause I can't say no.

But I won't be fat forever!

[vinesqueen 2]

I was going to go back and edit my original post, but well, I didn't feel like digging through 16 pages.

I'm fat because I have a brain tumor and gain weight at 1000 calories a day.

[Malice X Girl 0]

I am fat because I choose to eat...over eat and not make healthy choices.

[papaya 0]

Lifestyle more than anything else has been my problem. I had a wonderful

childhood, great mother and family. Up until the last few years I have been very active, played lots of golf and worked 100 hour weeks for 30 years. I was able to do so because I required little sleep and in general was in very good health considering my weight. .

I strongly feel that my problem was that I was on the road a lot and relied mostly on fast food (about 2/3 of all meals). I graduated from high school weghing 180 pounds From 1965 to 1988 I gained about 250 pounds. Since 1988 I am down about 30 pounds from a high of about 475. In retrospect I was gaining about 1 pound a month, that's a little over 100 calories a day.

I have a wife who also is heavy and loves to snack at night, an additional problem since seeing her eat triggered my appetite. Looking back it seems that it would have taken so little to avoid my tremendous weight gain, eliminating a piece of bread, soda etc daily would have made a huge difference.

Since 1988 I have needed to change eating habits to keep from gaining and aditional weight. At first it was eliminating the soda, then late night snacking etc. Now I eat a very heathy diet with very few refined carbs

and that is what is required simply to stay even.

I am due for lapband surgery soon and hopefully I can drop enough weight to start exercising so I can increase my metabolism. As you would expect I have constant back pain and joint problems.

Moving from the midwest to the Northwest has been an eye opener. There is no question that there is more emphasis here on a healthy life style. People are far more active and make better eating choices. I also now have many neighbors from their 40's to mid 80's who are extremely fit. My friends back in the midwest were all heavy, ate lots of unhealthy food and exercised little.

For years I passed the buck and simply blamed genetics and thought that poeple who were thin were simply born with "skinny genes". I am sure that helps, but my neighbors are all very disiplined about exercising and they eat very healthy diets, that more than anything else accounts for difference between us.

So friends, in my case lifestyle and lack of self disipline has been my downfall.

[Iulizbug 0]

I got fat b/c of hunger pains. I have always had an abnormally large appetite and do not get satisfied easily. My weight has fluctuated since I was a little girl but overall I have been heavy. The only time I wasn't heavy was in college b/c I took speed to not eat at all. But the side effects were not pretty and once I got off of the drug I re-gained all of my weight that I had lost plus an additional 90 lbs. My boyfriend and family have heatlhy appetites but they can get satisfied off of normal portions while I needed much much more. When I tried to stop eating when they did I would secretly binge eat about an hr later alone and in shame. That is why the lapband has been such a lifesaver for me. Even though I am not anywhere near goal I have lost over 30 lbs and am not starving all day. I look forward to reaching my sweet spot and not having to worry about gaining all of the weight back AGAIN when my will power runs out. My whole life the only way I could stay at a normal weight before the band is with extreme will-power and self control which made my life miserable. It feels so nice to go to sleep and not have painful hunger all night long keeping me up. I love my band!!

~Liz~

banded 03/10/06

Dr.Ortiz

237/205/150

5'7''

[jojo41 0]

Tricia K.....I have always had a tendency to gain weight "easily"I just assumed I had a slow metabolism ( I always managed to stay within a "normal" weight range through starvation and exercise) then when I was 32 my periods became irregular and I started gaining weight. I went to the doctor who did blood tests and told me my testosterone levels were elevated but it was nothing to worry about.

Between my 32nd and 38th birthdays I gained 100lbs....I had no idea how, but blamed my inactivity and love of food.< /p>

So again I went to the doctor who just told me to lose weight and my periods would get back to normal.

Then one day I was watching a current affairs show that had a story on "Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome"...a lightbulb went off in my head....I had ALL the symptoms. I went back to the doctor and told him all about PCOS, I had tests and it was confirmed I was one of millions of women with dreaded PCOS!

I thought to myself "Hallelujah!.... Now I know why I've gained so much weight, I've got PCOS, I'll have treatment or take a pill and it will go away. I was so excited that there was a "reason" behind my rapid weight gain, lethargy, excess Hair growth, irregular periods and moodswings however this feeling of elation soon subsided when I asked my doctor what I should do for treatment for PCOS and he replied "Lose Weight!" AAAARRRRGGGHHHH!!!!

[Pamruto 0]

Thank-you all for sharing your stories.

I can say I eat for all the same reasons but to be honest I don't really know. I love food, I can't control the amount that goes in, I eat to feel better, I eat to punish myself.

I have been banded and I am waiting for my first fill. I am sticking to the post surgery diet (4 weeks now, 2 to go) but its difficult not to grab a pack of chips or pig out on what my family is having instead of my half cup of chicken and vegatables.

Food for my is an addiction. I have kicked the habit before but then fallen off the wagon and each time its harder to get back on so the weight would come back and each time add more.

I'm hoping the band is a kind of seat belt that won't let me fall off as I don't think I could stand one more failure.

Pam:paranoid