Post-op: So depressed... so lost

[adorkbl 156]

Ugh, I am really struggling with my depression right now. I went off meds last March and have been doing well managing it. Now that food has been taken away, I am so lost. So frustrated. I am so bored. I realize now just how often I ate when bored or blue, and now I am so lost as to what to do. I know I need to get outside and go for a walk, but I just cannot get myself to move.

Did anyone else have issues with depression rearing it's ugly head post-op. I am not suicidal, just want to curl into a ball and sleep forever. I do not want to have to go back on my meds. I am not ever sure if I can??? *sigh* I just needed to vent. Find someone who can relate? Not sure.

***UPDATE 1/26**

I just want to say thank you to everyone who responded. It got worse before it got better last night. Hubby came home and started cooking in front of me and I got upset so I went to the bedroom so I didn't have to smell it.

He didn't even come to check on me. In all fairness I just glared at him and went to our bedroom, so my communication skills with him were inappropriate. Needless to say we had a little tiff by the time he came to bed four hours later. I was so upset that he completely ignored me all night after I had emailed him how depressed I was. I was a crying mess and my poor stomach was sore by the time I calmed down. I hope I did not do any damage by being so upset.

We have worked it out, and I am feeling better this morning. I still have some of my antidepressants left, so I think I will try going back on them gradually. The kind of behavior I was exhibiting last night was not fair to my husband and was a past indicator of when things were heading downhill.

Anyone here take Zoloft? I think if I start off on half a pill again I will be good until I can get in to see my Dr. I think half a pill will be small enough to swallow.

Thanks again everyone. Today is a new day and I plan on pulling my bootstraps up and getting back in the game.

[NukeChik 1]

I'm sorry that you are feeling down L.A. I can't really relate, I guess I've dealt with it in a different way. I have started an organizational attack on my home. Every day when I go home I organize something. It started with my closet, I organized all my clothes (ranging from size 20-12) in descending order. This is how I have always dealt with what would be called depressing situations, I just keep myself busy so I don't have to think about it.

Just know that I'm here for you if you need to vent or anything else!! I have gone through bouts of depression in my life. I've been on several different types of meds. I guess I never figured that the depression was as bad as the side effects of the meds I was taking. Try and feel better in knowing that soon the weight will be dropping off!

[adorkbl 156]

Thanks Nikki. I go back to work tomorrow so I am sure that will help. Sitting home alone all week is depressing.

Today is the first day I actually feel hungry and I want to eat something. I am so sick of liquids. Think that is a large source of the frustration.

I should organize and clean, but I don't want to overdo it so soon after surgery.

[travelgirl 3]

Well, first of all, here's a ((((((hug)))))) for you.

You just had surgery 9 days ago, right? You are probably still on a post-op diet, I'd guess, maybe on mushies? So, if that's the case, then I'd be surprised if you didn't feel a little depressed. I'd love to tell you that it will pass as you progress to real food, but it might not. Depression sucks.

I was first put on anti-depressants after I quit smoking. I would cry about nothing at all, and it frustrated me, and frustrated the hell out of DH. He'd ask me what was wrong, and all I could say was "nothing" which was sort of true, or that I didn't know, because I truly didn't know. I felt like I'd lost a close family member or friend, and there was just nothing that helped. Cigarettes were my crutch. They were always there when I needed them. If I got mad, light a cigarette. I was happy, light a cigarette. I was bored, light a cigarette. You get the idea. It ruled my life, much the way food did up until my surgery.

I imagine that might be similar to how you feel right now. I don't really have any advice to offer except that if you continue to feel this way in the next few weeks, talk to your doctor. I was on anti-depressants when I had surgery, and was able to take them without a problem right after surgery, so don't worry about that aspect of it too much. Just make sure that if your doc does prescribe something that it's something that can be cut up if need be, and not a time-release pill.

Here's another (((hug))), and I hope you start feeling better very soon.

[Daisalana 33]

I can relate, and I think sitting at home is just highlighting the problem.

I was going to see a shrink, but it was a 3 month wait list and then near time, they had to cancel it. So I gave up on that..

Keeping busy is the solution for me. If I sit around with too much time on my hands, I will get depressed.

But I work full time, student full time, and when I go home, I clean my house, clean my animals, cook dinner (i've REALLY gotten into cooking since banding). I love making gourmet foods, trying new recipes, trying things I've never done.. like lamb roast! Take up a new hobby. Cross stitching, crochet, painting, writing, whatever. The weekends are my down time, and I play a lot of video games too (FFXI mostly) which is very time consuming. And cook and clean.

[nadean 0]

I now exactly what you are feeling and I didn't stop taking my anti-depressents. I feel like I have lost my best friend. I don't know what to do with myself now that I can't eat when I get bored or upset. I never realized how sick of an addiction to food I had until I got banded. I'm going to try and find a hobby that I enjoy but it is difficult because I am a stay at home mom with 3 kids, on a strict financial budget, and living in a city that I don't know anyone. I enjoyed food so much and now that it is gone I feel like I might feel better if I find something else to replace it that I enjoy. I just don't know what that is. You sort of lose yourself when your time is always about your DH and kids. I am sorry you are feeling like this and I hope that we both get better.

[Bandme08 0]

sorry to be off topic, but how do I get a ticker?

[Sunshine08 0]

Hi L.A.

I just wanted to let you know that you can be on meds with the band. I have been on Cymbalta for anxiety and depression for over a year, and I still take it - I was banded just over 2 weeks ago, and I just open up the capsule and put it on the back of my tongue - so it can be done. I can definitely relate. This surgery really makes you stare your food problems in the face - whether its boredom, emotions, you really learn alot about yourself.

I am SO sorry you are feeling down, are you still in pain?

[dianegoe 0]

Hi LA,

Last week I was feeling sad because I was so hungry. Now that I have been eating mushie stuff I feel better. But if you need medicine for depression I would take it because it's not a sign of weakness. Studies show that people who don't get a handle on dealing with loss of food as a crutch will overspend, drink, gamble or use other substitutes that are not healthy. You need to get back on your medication and talk to a counselor about how your feeling. This is very important. Please talk to your Dr. and tell him that you are depressed. A little medicine will make you feel better and then you will have more energy to go for a walk with will help. Hope you take care of yourself. The surgery is only the first step. Diane

[judyprude 0]

Sorry you're feeling down; it IS a huge change, huh! I've tried twice in my life to wean off antidepressants, only to slowly sink into the bottom of a big black hole. So I've decided that quitting antidepressants when you need them is a stupid as taking the cast off your broken leg before it's healed! If my brain chemistry requires prozac to function properly, then Prozac it is! I look back at the lives of 2 of my aunts and feel so sad to know that if they'd just had access to antidepressants they would have lived MUCH happier lives! Thank God for modern medicine! ;o}

[MissMom24 2]

Hey LA~

I was feeling down to, but I am taking my meds and honestly feel so much better!! I figure I need to get rid of one thing of a time...that begins with eliminating LOTS of the food that I was eating and as I get used to that I can hopefully get off my meds. IF I CANT, then that is OK too. Just remember this is new for alot of us, and sometimes it is just harder to cope than others.

Exercize will make you feel better. Even if you just go down the street and get some fresh air!

{{{{{HUGS}}}}

Brandy

[thistledo 0]

sorry you're having a rough time. i know what it's like. im an antidepressant user as well, but i havent taken them since the op.

the onlysuggestions i have are hard ones... try ringing a friend, or pm-ing one of us. i have had a few days where i hve just cried and cried, then yesterday i felt quite bright. it's not easy.

ringing someone is the last thing you feel like doing but if you have someone who will understand, it is worth doing. i forced myself to do it, and it helped a bit.

i hope today you are doing a little better. (((hugs)))

t

[heidisue 0]

I'm sorry you feel depressed L.A. I know how you feel, I suffer from depression too. I am on an antidepressant that has helped me tremendously though. I'm on Lexapro which has been the best one for me so far. Just try not to overdo things & get plenty of rest.

[Hopping To It 25]

Hopefully it will help to let you know I had the same problem for a few weeks after surgery up and down up and down I got very concerned but please know it goes away and life is wonderful!!!!!!!!!!!

Hugs

[shortgal 5]

If you were taking medication and stopped it suddenly, that could be part of the problem. People on antidepressants should be weaned off of them.

The whole surgery process could be making you feel a little down as well. are you getting enough Protein in everyday? At least 50 to 60 grams?

Please try walking. It can be hard to start but once you get out and do it, it will make you feel so much better. If you can get out during the daylight hours, it is even better for the brain!

Surgery and a change in diet is a lot for the body to handle, you just need some time to re-adjust.