For those with BMI 35-40?

[girlie2shooz 0]

We all get different reactions from different people, but typically others opinions are a reflection of themselves. I am of the mindset that I tell anyone who asks. I am the one who has had to live this life on a rollercoaster of weight loss and gain. i am the one who has thought about every bit of food i have ever eaten or didn't eat. i am the one who if it could be done, i would have done it, who wants to be fat? if I could change I would have done it years ago. i have tried it all and it HAS NOT worked. so I am doing something that does work. Until someone walks in my shoes they really shouldn't judge. I am ecstatic about having surgery. I am going to finally get the monkey off my A$$. I know what good meal planning is and i certainly am no stranger to exercise so having a tool that completes the circle for me is just what I need. I don't know about the rest of you but I can eat and not ever really feel full/satisfied. So this is just right for me! If others are unsupportive then so be it, don't judge what you don't understand!!!I will be banded 3/5/08!! I can hardley wait!G2S

[chell1957 2]

Hey, I went to an introduction of the surgery this past Monday, I am 5'4" and weight 225 with BMI of 38. I felt like a lightweight and I know some of the larger men and women looked at me like I didn't belong there. But I do. I have TypeII diabetes, and joint problems and sleep Apnea.

If any of the nurses or other say anything I will most probably tell them politely that they are NOT me. Don't pass judgment. The staff seems to be very supportive. So I hope no problems with them.

I can relate to how you fee. I too am 5'3" and weight 210 ish...my BMI is 37 (should be 24!) and I have Type 2 Diabetic, High B.P., High cholesterol, a bad back (had spine surgery). So I have alot of reasons to want this. I agree with you in telling them to mind their own business. How heavy and sick should we be to meet someone else's opinion of needing the surgery? Why wait till we are even sicker? O.K. I will get off my soap box now.

[Jachut 487]

Oh it gets worse! I went to a seminar last night as my surgeon asked me to speak at it. My DH was also attending as he wants to be banded. So we did both on the same night. As a "normal" weight person, I got some of the filthiest looks you could imagine for just being there - even in support of someone else, and my DH has a BMI of about 35 like I did at first so he was easily the least obese person there.

Then when I was introduced, suprise surprise, suddenly everyone's face is open and friendly. Like I had gained acceptance now that they know that I used to be "one of them".

Quite confronting really.

[socalgal3 4]

That's too bad that happened to you Jacqui!

As far as people's comments, I think they just don't know what to say. If you tell them you are getting surgery and they say "good for you!" They may think they are saying "you need it!" If they say, "Oh, you aren't that big", they are really saying, "we love you the way you are". Well, that may not be true, but it might-just trying to think positive. You know-they don't want to insult you by agreeing with you that you need surgery. But, also, in America, so many people are morbidly obese, so we have become accustomed to bigger people. So, someone who is just "overweight" seems normal sized to us.

[Shamrockgirl60 1]

I would rather get stares when I am normal weight again, I get an occasional stare now, usually from very skinny young people, most of the time when you are overweight your invisible. That sucks also. Very interesting your getting dirty looks from the very overweight people. Seems there is jealousy and discrimination for everyone which is rather sad.

[chell1957 2]

I just had my surgery last week,i only weigh 246 before surgery i had the the same experience. i am african american and carry weight in my thighs and butt, so i often get your not fat. i have chronic back pain and heart disease runs in my family. but i know i made the right choice because my father died of a massive heart attack the day after my surgery last week. i know i did the right thing.

OMG! I am so sorry for your lose! Losing a parent is never easy.

[chicagogayle 0]

Hi, I was just wondering what your experiences have been as far as when you told people about your upcoming surgery. I feel like if my BMI was in the 50's it would be easier for people to understand and or be supportive of wanting to get this done.

My BMI is 39 as of today and I finally had the nerve to tell my best friend and she was totally not supportive and basically blew it off and said, "just join weight watchers, your not that big to have to go get a surgery". A friend at work told me basically the same thing too, "oh you aren't fat ha ha ha your so funny". But to me I am fat.......... obese......... whatever you want to call it. Just to name a few things, my knees and back hurt, I have no energy and this is so embarrassing to say but if I sit on the toilet to long my legs and feet fall asleep and I know that's from all this weight (242) I am carrying around. If weight watchers would work I would do it but obviously it dosen't nor does/did all the other 20 diets I have tried :cursing: . I just feel like I have to really explain myself like when I was telling her I kept saying but I'm so unhealthy, if I wasn't unhealthy then I wouldn't do this, my Dr. thinks it's for the best, etc......

UGH, why can't people think this is great, be supportive, and be happy for me?

Don't listen to them. I have a BMI of 35 with 3 existing medical conditions. People told me the same thing. After two years, my insurance approved my surgery. It's been 11 days since surgery and I am so glad I had it done. I am 51 years old and have 6 grandchildren. I want to ride a bike with them this summer and travel with them. I tried Weight Watcher's 7 years ago and lost 50lbs only to have all the weight and then some return within 5 years. If you want the surgery - go for it and get support through others. Good Luck.

[Blund 0]

I'm going for it too. My BMI is 36 and I am 5'8' so I get told I "carry it well" whatever THAT means! Yeah, I'm tall AND fat! I have some comorbidities so I'm hoping for BC approval. The surgeon's office said it looks good.

My best friend seems afraid to say too much when I talk about it. She's struggled with her weight all her life too. From what she HAS said, I dont think she wants me to do it, but would be supportive. She says things like "if we just try to do this together and make it work" or "when summer comes, we can excercise more..." Well, I'm tired of trying over and over and over. I need more help than I've gotten so far, and now I'm "middle aged" and I want to feel better. I've tried so many things like everyone here, and I've lost and gained enought weight throughout my life to make several extra people! lol!

Crossing my fingers! I know what I want, now its up to BC

[Shamrockgirl60 1]

I think our friends who are also overweight are either scared or jealous or both. They may want to do the same thing but are too scared to do it.I have a best friend who is more overweight than me, she's skeptical of the surgery. She has more medical problems than I do.

I just got off the phone with my PCP's secretary "Inga" well I got a letter today saying that I need to go to Weight Watchers...HELLO!!!! I tried that a few times years ago. Lost and put on again, it's a cycle. I called her and she had no idea there was a Weight Surgery Clinic. I have never met her she's always in the "back room" at the hospital, but I would bet a million she's skinny LOL.

I told her I wanted a letter from PCP to send to BC/BS saying I need this surgery. She checked the records and said. "Oh, your already signed up for this....I said sure but I need something to send BCBS letting them know I need this for my overall health. DUH!!!! she finally "got it" and said he would send a letter to me to forward to BCBS. Now how hard is that. Geez. LOL

Oh I don't think there will be a problem with your insurance. The clinic people said it's one of the easiest to get permission from.

Some don't even cover it no matter what.

[Blund 0]

Yes, I think we're lucky to have BCBS. I think things are on my side so far. Had my psych appt today, and he'll have the report to the surgeon in a week.

Now my BC is in California (but I live in Michigan) and they require I use a "Center of Expertise" that is a provider. Have you checked on this? My "Center of Expertise" is taking care of all my paperwork and keeping track of what BC needs. Your nurse sounds like a ditz. If you have your old weigh-in cards from Weight Watchers, you may be able to send copies in to BC to prove you've done it already. My BC card has a special 800 phone number for pre-service reviews. You may want to call it yourself to get the criteria. I can't tell if you already know all this or not, so I hope I don't offend you.

:eek:

Barb

[Lana24 10]

Hi everyone,

I have a bmi of 37 and I hear it too..."your not big enough to have WLS"...well poo to you is what I say. This fat miserable body belongs to me and I get the final say!! Good luck all...this process is hell for me this week I hope the rest of you are having an easier go of it

[jfromsd 0]

I'm so glad to hear everything you all have to say about getting banded! It's always reassuring to hear of others with your same concerns. I'm 29yrs old, 5' 7.5" and have a BMI around 35.5-36. I have BCBS Ins, but w/o any serious medical conditions (comorbidities) YET, they're not gonna fit the bill. Oh well, I say! Enough of this losing some, gaining more, feeling-crappy about my body, and feeling tired all the time nonsense. I've decided that if anyone is gonna fix this "problem" of mine, it's gotta be me! So, as a self-pay and a bit of a lower-BMI patient, I just set up my appt for April 11th in Mexico. I'm so excited to have the help (I obviously need, or I wouldn't have spent the past 10yrs overweight!?!) to get myself healthy again! And the fiancee is incredibly supportive and just wants me healthy and happy:)

I'm so happy about all the comments on who to tell about your LBS as well. I've only told my boyfriend (well, fiancee after yesterday--yay!!) :eek: and my parents. I think it's a personal decision and that it's likely a lot of people just wouldn't understand. And I love the idea of just telling people at work, for instance, that I'm just really trying to eat small portions. (I work at a dental office, and the topic of weight has been a daily discussion for the past year at least--damn women!!) :thumbup:

Anyway, I'm sorry if I've created a snooze-fest on this one (got a lil' long winded), but keep the threads going... They're so helpful to us newcomers!

:biggrin2:

Oh yeah, and I just have one question for anyone that has done their banding in Mexico.. How was it finding a Dr to do fills close to home?? Any issues with that??

[lisa 717 0]

I'm getting banded in mexico on Feb 26. Supposed to be on a totally non fat diet, mostly yoghurt, grilled chicken, fish and veggies for 2 weeks prior. So nervous that I keep cheating and putting the fat free diet off til "tomorrow." I'm hoping that because my BMI isn't so very high that my liver won't be too slippery and fatty (this is the reason I'm told for the pre-op diet.) Any one else failing at such an early stage? I now have only 10 pre-surgery days left.

[Jachut 487]

By pure chance I had had a liver ultrasound just prior to my first consult with my surgeon. When I went to my GP, and asked him for a referral to a lap band surgeon, he sent me off on a barrage of tests (which actually saved a lot of time for me), one of which was a liver ultrasound. So I knew that my liver was within normal limits, therefore my surgeon told me there was no need to do the Optifast.

Well, I thought I'd get a head start on weight loss, after 3 days I was passing out, lol. I kept fainting. Cheating on Optifast isnt failing! YOu need to try to stick to it for obvious reasons but its hard hard hard and absolutely no indication of how you will do after surgery. I couldnt stick to it unless I had a gun to my head, knowing my liver was OK for surgery, well there was no way I could stick to it!

[COSkinnyGirl 0]

It's funny... My BMI is 'only' just over 37. I have only been to the seminar thus far. I meet with the surgeon on 3/5. I told a couple of my girlfriends I was thinking about it, the ones I thought would support me. I basically got a half hearted responses from all of them and frankly, none of them have even remotely bothered to mention it again. Not one of them has even bothered to ask me how the seminar went? Frankly, I don't intend to tell anyone else. I am honestly not even sure I want to tell my mother.