Should I stay or should I go?

[badonkadonkbutt 1]

marimaru, awesome metaphor. I never thought of it that way but that is exactly what it is....at least in my experience. Thank you!

[Cgailee 1]

I agree with the counceling advice. Like someone earlier that spoke of her parents divorcing when she was a kid, mine divorced when we were all grown they stayed in it for us. I have to tell you that it may have been better to see them happy growing up. Now, they are both so much happier and it's nice. Also, I think it may have been a little bit more peaceful growing up. I have mixed feeling about it. I had to go to therapy afterward, I think it is difficult anytime. You have to do what is best for you in the end. Your daughter will understand and love you through it all. That's the way kids are.

[minpinmom 2]

I hope you go to counseling. My job is working for Michael and Amy Smalley, the Smalley's pioneered Marriage counseling in the 70s and continue today. I handle their Marriage Intensive Program for couples in crisis. Most of our couples are already going through a divorce when they attend our intervention. However counseling of any kind is the answer, whether you end up staying or leaving. You will be able to tell your little girl that you tried everything. Trust me, if you leave or stay, counseling will help.

[lovingheart 0]

Only you know deep down inside what you really want and what you really need-and wahtever that may be I wish you the best of luck in making this descion.

I am not a Dr and dont claim to be- and I think you have some ideas where you can start- and where you can end-

Just remember to stay strong and hold you head up high-

In some cases a spouse will say that their husband or wife is cheating because- They are cheating or they want to cheat or they already have So in that case just remember if you havent cheated then that issue lies within the accuser- for one reason or another- (mostly insercuites) for whatever reason- Do not blame yourself-

And sometimes counsling can help even if its just to vent---

I wish you the best-- Take care of yourself no matter what and your child.

[AUSSIECHIK 0]

and i agree with wat every 1 said, but only u know if u wana stay or go.. i also have horses dogs cats n as much as i love them i wouldnt stay just so i can keep them, ur child is the most important.. and at the end the day if u wana leav take ur child n go be happy u only live once...

[S@ssen@ch 745]

I agree, counseling.....even if it's only for you would help you. It helps you understand yourself, see the picture and make your own decisions.

It's amazing how many people are in situations just like this. I think men just don't know how their behavior affects us (and vice versa). Their own fears and weaknesses come out in this negative way but essentially push us away. My husband does exactly the same things you described. I've been accused of sleeping with more people than I could count, wearing perfume or sexy clothing to "turn so and so on". I've been told I'm worthless, lazy, etc. but yet I'm so desirable every man is screwing me!

Only you can make this decision, but you have to reach a point where you KNOW it's the right one. By asking us, I don't think you're sure. Seek counseling. They won't decide for you, they'll help you understand yourself and your situation better so that you can feel good in making the right decision for you.

[betrthnever 107]

So sorry to hear about what you've been going through. I more then understand. Something to consider, from my experience as well as many others: The person who accuses the other of having affairs is often the one who is having the affairs. Also, it sounds like your husband might have a psychological problem (is he really up in the clouds and then upset/depressed? These cycles can happen over the course of a couple of days or much quicker then that). And emotional abuse is abuse. Sometimes things aren't meant to work out.