Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Jeff Foxworthy's Wisconsin



Recommended Posts

Jeff Foxworthy on Wisconsin

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 38 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each year because Park Falls is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too pricey," you might live in Wisconsin .

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, you might live in Wisconsin .

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Wisconsin .

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you may not have actually eaten it, but you have heard of Head cheese, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you have either a pet or a child named "Brett," you might live inWisconsin .

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you know how to say Oconomowoc, Waukesha , Menomonie & Manitowoc, you might live in Wisconsin .

If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy, you might live inWisconsin.

If every time you see moonlight on a lake, you think of a dancing bear,and you sing gently, "From the land of sky-blue waters,"....you might live in Wisconsin .

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE WISCONSINITE WHEN:

1. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on thehighway.

2. "Vacation" means going up north past Hwy 8 for the weekend.

3. You measure distance in hours.

4. You know several people who have hit deer more than once.

5. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again.

6. Your whole family wears Packer Green to church on Sunday.

7. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.

8. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings and funerals ).

9. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave bothunlocked.

10. You think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and venison.

11. You carry jumper cables in your car and your wife or girlfriend knows how to use them.

12. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill's Fleet Farmat any given time.

13. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

14. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled withsnow.

15. You refer to the Packers as "we."

16. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.

17. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.

18. You have no problem pronouncing Lac Du Flambeau.

19. You consider Minneapolis exotic.

20. You know how to polka.

21. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.

22. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.

23. Down South to you means Illinois .

24. A brat is something you eat.

25. Your neighbor throws a party to Celebrate his new pole shed.

26. You go out to fish fry every Friday

27. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

28. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

29. You find minus twenty degrees "a little chilly."

30. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Wisconsin friends.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • RacMag  »  bhogue925

      Hi, I’m new here. I’m currently on the liver shrinking diet. So far so good, but I have to say I haven’t found a protein shake I like. Anyone have any suggestions please? My surgery date is September 17th. 
      · 2 replies
      1. BlondePatriotInCDA

        Fairlife Core are by far the best. They taste just as they are - chocolate milk. You can either get the 26 grams or the 42 grams (harder to find and more expensive). For straight protein look at Bulksuppliments.com ..they have really good whey proteins and offer auto ship plus they test for purity. No taste or smell...

      2. BlondePatriotInCDA

        Fairlife has strawberry, vanilla and of course chocolate. No more calories than other protein drinks. Stay away from Premiere, they're dealing with lawsuits due to not being honest about protein content.

    • Doctor-Links

      HGH For Sale
      hgh for sale at our online pharmacy
       
      Human growth hormone (HGH) is a small protein which is made in part of the brain called the pituitary gland. It travels in your bloodstream all over your body to make your body grow.
      HGH is very important in the body. It is needed for children to grow normally. It helps make sure there is enough muscle and fat in the body. It keeps our bones healthy.
      Buy Rybelsus online, Rybelsus tablets
      You can order for wegovy at our online pharmacy
      Check for the prices of 0.25mg, 0.5mg and 1mg at our online pharmacy and buy ozempic.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×