Do you think there is discrimination against obese people?

[gweniper 0]

I was pregnant and obese, took a girl that I took care of with me out to Breakfast, this young lady is pretty disabled, age 15 at the time with mentality of a 18 month to 2 yr old. my pre-pregnancy weight was 272 lbs, size 24. I was 5 or 6 months pregnant and so was getting larger. (only gained 29 lbs over the whole pregnancy and most of that was in months 8 and 9). We were seated and brought drinks. then started the half hour of waiting for our order to be taken. I watched 3-5 more tables be sat and all the orders taken. Finally I got up, when asked what was up by one of the staff I said I was tried of waiting while others that were seated ofter me ordered and were served their meals.

I went to the register, the manager was there. the only thing he was going to do is give me our drinks for free. I paid for them as I did not feel that I should condone their discrimination by accepting their non-apology of a free drink. never went back to the restaurant until I moved to a new city.

[Chrisann 0]

Well I have to say that I am offended by the gaudy, couch looking materials on clothes that are for sale in the stores for overweight women.

But I can honestly say that I have never felt discrimination. Maybe I have led a charmed life. Maybe because I have self confidence, and never let my size get in my way. I feel sorry that so many of you had to experience that.

[famouslastwords 0]

I hate "plus size" section in stores, like seriously they are disgusting and so ugly and they defend me. I think that Lane Bryant is the only one who does "plus size" right. I hate Old Navys. All of their clothes are unflattering on my body.

[destined2befree 0]

I have been discriminated by a heavier person than myself. My neighbor was at the support group meeting at the local hospital where I was going to have my surgery. Unbeknownst to me, she had just had gastric bypass surgery the week of Thanksgiving and had a leak in her pouch and had to be opened up and ended up spending 11 days in the hospital. I walked up behind her and her husband say me and said hello, she turned to look at me and says, (VERY LOUDLY) WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE???? so loud that everyone standing in line, looks over at me. I responded with, I am looking into having the lap band, she says, really???? I couldnt beloieve she did that to me! especially because during the 7 years that we were neighbors, she saw me have 2 kids, walking, do diet after diet after diet and talk with her about my weight troubles...so its true that fat people discriminate against lesss fat people. I have since had surgery and since we no longher live next door to each other, we dont talk much, but i wish her the best and told her so after the last meeting I saw her at.

[coolcrystal 1]

so its true that fat people discriminate against lesss fat people. I have since had surgery and since we no longher live next door to each other, we dont talk much, but i wish her the best and told her so after the last meeting I saw her at.

This is very true.

I have a lot of large friends and some slim friends and for my wedding I had asked the girl I knew the longest since we were kids to be my maid of honor.. well, she happens to be in really good shape and about 125 pounds. After she left my big friends made derrogitory comments about her being a "skinny waife" and "no wonder she's your maid of honor, becuase she's skinny".. like insinuating that I only picked her for that reason, even though the other girl I picked was 215 pounds. It had nothing to do with weight! Many times my bigger friends have done this towards skinnier people.

[gretchens4 0]

Wheetsin,

I was 240 for my last 3 pregnancies and had no issues (I was 25 with my 1st and started at 223). I am 5'5". I gained a lot of weight after I had my last baby (I was 34) and ended up getting banded last year in Feb. and have gone from 292-214. I got pg very easily every time and had no health problems, so it is possible. I had my 3rd baby around your age. Good luck!! You should do great.

[Linds 0]

Like many of us I lacked confidence and any negative remarks would send me straight to the comfort eating zone. I always watched my weight from a child and struggled with it and the comments it brought but the one that really sent my eating disorder spiralling into space was when I had literally just spent 19 hours in labour with my first baby and the nurse given the job of bathing me whispered in my ear "why have you let yourself go like this? you have a lovely husband and baby and you look like this"

I weighed 210lbs then but soon ballooned to over 400lbs thanks partly to my "angel" nurse. Don't get me wrong, I take full responsibility for the food I put in my mouth and the lack of exercise I take but we each and everyone of us should think of the impact that everything we say or write could have on anyone.

I have heard people who have successfully lost their weight through WLS say cruel thingsabout big people and all I can say about them is that perhaps they themselves deserved to be big....or am I just being horrible.

[Cherlita 0]

I don't keep a record of rude and discriminate behavior that I have been subjected to, (the list would be very long) but I do recall certain incidences that make me chuckle. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, I just ignore them, and certainly don't want to waste my precious time dealing with their feelings of inadequacy.

One incident I'll share: When I was 17 I was in the state bowling finals. We bowled 3 games against one other person, who, in my case was a skinny girl; I was all of 180 lbs at the time. After the 1st game, which I bowled over a 200, she decided to tell the score keeper to use her "nickname" which she said was Fatso. The scorekeeper was the father of one of my friends. He was mortified at the request, but I told him to go ahead and put it down. See, what she didn't know is that if you piss me off, I do much better. Well, I bowled better games than the 1st game, all well over 200 pins, and ended up taking 2nd in state that year.

I have been overweight all of my life. The discrimination started in my own home with my father calling me names and telling me that no one would ever love me for being fat. I was the lucky one who got all of the fat cells in my family, everyone else was skinny or "normal". Anyway, I learned at a very young age that the only opinion that truly matters is my own.

Y'all have a great day

Cherlita

[snowbird 2]

What I am finding interesting is a difference in how sales clerks and others in public treat me now I am approaching "normal." I am finding that people are friendlier and much more likely to greet me with a smile now. What's up with that? My money is the same as it was before. When I was heavier it was always someone else in the group of friends who would be greeted first; now it is often me. People are so strange.

[NanaRenan 0]

and one more gripe...why are some booths in resturants so damn tight??

This comment made me think about the numerous times -- and my husband, family and friends can attest - that a dinner party at I am in will be ushered to a tight booth, EVEN when there is a perfectly adequate table open in the immediate vicinity.

Also, many times, although no one in the group ordered a diet soda, I am 'accidentally' given one.

If these things occurred a little more rarely or randomly, but its as if it's some form of subliminal punishment/motivation.....as if I didn't know I'm obese! I used to be bitter about it. Now, I just smile sweetly, act as if it's all innocent and never happened before and silently pray that they REMEMBER this if/when they are ever obese somewhere down the road. Cause y'never know....

I think that's why people do mock/ridicule/discriminate.....they're suffering from a deep, internal fear that they, too, could end up this way someday.

[LynneB 0]

Wow all these stories are so sad! I answered yes to the poll for numerous reasons. The one that stand out the most are:

High school, I was on the drill/dance team and I was the only one out of a team of 25 to have to weigh in before each performance and if I hadnt lost 2 pounds since the previous week I wasnt allowed to perform even tho I was one of the best dancers on the team. At that time I weighed between 140-160 at 5'1". I finally got sick of the humiliation my junior yr & quit the team.

At the age of 21 and the weight of 180, I applyed for a hostess position at a Lonestar Steakhouse. They at the time had all employees line dance in the aisles about once an hour. I had danced all my life & taught line dancing for 2 yrs so I knew my stuff and I told them that on my resume. They never auditioned me but my anorexic skinny friend who had never danced in her life was auditioned and told they could teach her how to dance since she looked good in their skin tight blue jean uniforms. I called to check on my app after she was hired & was told I didnt meet their "requirements". When I asked what requirements, they said they had weight limits due to uniform sizes. What they dont make jeans and white button down shirts in my size???!!! I shoulda slapped 'em w/ a discrimination lawsuit!!

More recently, I have had people ask me when I was "due". Like being fat means you are automatically pregnant?

And yes, I have had skinny salespeople ignore me and walk right up to a skinnier person who came up there after me knowing I had been waiting longer.

There are so many more times too. It doesnt matter what your confidence level is or how you are dressed, some ppl are just plain insensitive and ignorant!

[Fanny Adams 7]

You know, I can honestly say that I have never experienced this form of discrimination. While I wasn't fat in my teens or twenties, I've been fat for going on 15 years now (roughly 30-45), and I can't recall ever thinking I missed out on a job or wasn't served in a shop because of my weight. Sure I've had a few insults here and there, but never experienced actual discrimination. I don't know if I've just been lucky or if I'm just really unobservant and haven't noticed being ignored in a shop. When my daughter was in her late teens, I spent a lot of time in boutique shops, where I couldn't fit their largest item of clothing on one arm or one leg, let alone all of me, yet never got that impression from the sales people. Maybe it was just obvious I was shopping for someone else?

[wombat712 2]

I was turned down for a job that I was completely qualified for. I already worked at the company. They hired a cute little girl with of course a lovely figure as well. She was not qualified for the job and had to ask me for help. Very frustrating!!!

I didn't do anything about it nor did I leave the company for another 4 years.

[anonemouse 1]

I hate "plus size" section in stores, like seriously they are disgusting and so ugly and they defend me. I think that Lane Bryant is the only one who does "plus size" right. I hate Old Navys. All of their clothes are unflattering on my body.

You aren't kidding. The plus size section absolutely sucks. But I personally hate Lane Bryant, too. When you're fat and short (and I'm barely under average height), clothes shopping is the pits. At Lane Bryant, they apparently think that as women get wider, they also get taller. I can't even wear their petite stuff; it's 4 inches too long. Their shirts don't fit right either; the arms are too long, the neckline's too wide, etc.

I have been discriminated by a heavier person than myself. My neighbor was at the support group meeting at the local hospital where I was going to have my surgery. Unbeknownst to me, she had just had gastric bypass surgery the week of Thanksgiving and had a leak in her pouch and had to be opened up and ended up spending 11 days in the hospital. I walked up behind her and her husband say me and said hello, she turned to look at me and says, (VERY LOUDLY) WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE???? so loud that everyone standing in line, looks over at me. I responded with, I am looking into having the lap band, she says, really???? I couldnt beloieve she did that to me! especially because during the 7 years that we were neighbors, she saw me have 2 kids, walking, do diet after diet after diet and talk with her about my weight troubles...so its true that fat people discriminate against lesss fat people. I have since had surgery and since we no longher live next door to each other, we dont talk much, but i wish her the best and told her so after the last meeting I saw her at.

Seriously, I got the most flack about having the surgery from women that were much heavier than I was and who had already had surgery. They apparently couldn't see that while I wasn't as fat as they were, I was still fat and qualified for insurance coverage.

[restrict2008 0]

I think I may have blurted out "gee, I guess the diet is working, cause they can't see me"...and probably threw in some expletives.:biggrin:

omg that is so funny! you go girl!