Still no sex drive. What's wrong with me?

[Candle 11]

I got my band in August and have been really successful so far. -78lbs!!!

I noticed, or rather my BF noticed, around the beginning of the summer that my sex drive had really decreased. I chalked it up to my weight and used that as one of the selling points of the band. That put him on board - lol!

Everyone talks about how with weight loss their sex drive increases tenfold but that hasn't been the case for me. I have almost no interest in sex any more and it seems to be getting worse. It's really bumming me out.

My BF told me today that he talked to his therapist about it because he feels like I'm just not attracted to him any more. I've explained a million times that that's not the case. I'm not even masturbating any more. His therapist told him (and not for the first time) that she really thinks I need to be in therapy as well but that it may be something chemical going on inside me. She also said maybe my brain just hasn't caught up to my body’s weight loss yet. Which is true - I don't feel like I look any different even though I'm at the lowest weight I've been at in over 10 years!

Anyone else in the same boat or have any advice?

PS. I do agree that I need it and plan to start therapy soon. It just sucks that it isn't covered by my insurance. I have a therapist that I liked (the one I saw for surgery clearance) but $100 a pop is a large pill to swallow. Am I even going to get anywhere only being able to afford to go once or twice a month?

Thanks for listening. I actually got a little teary eyed typing this, knowing that my BF thinks I'm not interested in him any more.

<O:p

<O:p

[BRANDYK 0]

I also thought my sex drive was going to increase, it's been 7 months and 63lbs and still no change. I keep thinking once I get to goal I'll be feeling more frisky.

[Candle 11]

At least I'm glad to hear it's not just me! lol! And we're the same age.

Ugh - it's never easy, is it? If it's not one thing ... it's another.<!-- google_ad_section_end -->

[SuzanneG 1]

Waaaaaa, I was hoping this will help mine as well. Now I'm not so sure. I've been telling DH for a while now that feeling sexy is saying "look what I have that you want". Not exactly possible when feeling bad about myself because I'm fat and can feel my stomach between us (major buzz kill), not to mention the fact that I can't breath during because he's on crushing my fat into my lungs. Not a good scene.

I've also heard that fatigue is a major labido killer. Perhaps you are running too low on energy to think about it.

Here's hoping that things will improve for all of us over time.

[cattiff 1]

Well I feel for you I felt that way too all the way up to about a month agoI cant explain it but it just happened one day and now I cannot get enough. That doesn't mean I still don't feel sexy but I think it has finally hit me that I don't care what my DH thinks of how I look I just want it and I want it all the time. Give it time it will happen for you too.