Shrinkin' Violets- Part 2 Read Here

[Suziecat 379]

Sister and I were just talking about how after I questioned my nephew and he denied all, how we haven't seen him since. If he was so innocent, why hasn't he come back even to just visit. She texted him and she hasn't heard from him either. On GMA this morning they were talking about this very problem and that how more teens are getting into the heavy drugs and stealing from anybody they know. It was very scary.

I just hope and pray that he comes to his senses before anything bad happens.

[Haydee 2]

Hi girls! My appointment with Mary Jo was great today. She is very very personable and makes you feel like you're talking to your best friend. She says she's got my back and that we're going to do this together all the way. I can call her at any time and can email her at any time that I feel I need to... How awesome is that? Anyhoo, first thing that I needed to share... She asked me what I binged on. I told her that it was ice cream, cake, Cookies and candy. So, she said that anytime I was reaching for any of that stuff that instead of that I needed to fill a shot glass full of vinegar and hold it in my mouth for a full two minutes then spit it out. That I needed to do this religiously. EVERY SINGLE TIME. She said that after awhile that my brain will connect cake cookies and ice cream with a bad taste in my mouth and I won't want them anymore. !!!!!! I hope I hope I hope that's true. Can't hurt to try. Also another thing is that when I work out I mostly do cardio. She says that I need to do only 20 min of cardio and 40 min of weights. Three times a week. She says weights burn fat faster. So, I'm gonna start on Saturday with free weights and see what happens. She says that if I vow to do these two things religiously then by the time I see her again in 4 weeks I will be 20 lbs lighter.

On another note... she almost guaranteed me that if I keep seeing her that more than likely I'll end up terminating my relationship with Juan. She asked me if I was okay with knowing that upfront. She says that once my self esteem and my self worth are where they are supposed to be that I won't tolerate the bullshit that Juan's been feeding me all these years... I didn't know what to say to that. That's not really what I was hoping to hear but she's brutally honest and she has a mouth like a sailor! LOL, I loved her!

Okay, off to bed now. I've got another long weekend ahead of me. Packing packing packing...

[Suziecat 379]

Haydee, that's a lot to think about. I know you have a lot of feelings about you and Juan but that even scared me reading that. Just take your time and really think. Just know that we will back you all the way. You too special.

[TerriDoodle 6]

Wow, that's really interesting, Haydee! She sounds refreshingly honest. Where's her office and how much does she charge??

Vinegar, huh? 2 minutes, huh? Vinegar's pretty freakin' nasty!! I wonder if I could do it?!

[kity 2]

i am willing to do the vinegar thing starting Monday! I need to have no pressure this weekend. Gonna psych myself into working out every day next week. Just need to self-destruct a bit this weekend...how is that for brutally honest!

Haydee~ She sounds like a keeper. Honestly...it is what I need too...someone who doesn't put up w/ my own bullshit! Enjoy the lesson...whatever the outcome honey, it will be what is best for you.

peaceout

[Daisalana 33]

Hey girls on way to tunica and. Usibg new phone to get on. Lbt how cool now ill always have my vs with me! Text my cell and entertain me I got 3 hourts to go

Thanks for sharing haydee I'm going to try the vinegar keep sharibg her gems with us!

As for juan I was telling u that but I realized u didn't want to hear it so I backed off

Ok vs txt me!

Lovies

[Daisalana 33]

Although I do luv vinegar and could easily drink it lol

[Kat817 19]

Good Luck in Tunica Laura!!!

Haydee, I am glad you felt good about your visit with the Dr. I will be totally honest with you here---I find the prediction quite sad. Yes I do feel Juan owes you more, and that you deserve nothing but the very best, but you have also mentioned many qualities he has that show him to not be all bad. I get that she thinks she can boost your self esteem to a point of not taking any more crap----but could an equally good Dr, not make the negatives of Juans into positives too?

I am not anti divorce---obviously, I have done it twice! But I also see that a good relationship is worth fighting for. Only you can decide if it is worth fighting for, and she has never met the man.

I fully believe in any situation there are 3 sides, yours-his-and the real issue. Not to say you or Juan are not being honest, you ARE, you are telling her how you see it your way. Which is how it should be----but at the same time, no one is hearing how he sees it.

I have no doubt he has issues, and that you have them with him! We all do----Rick has got onto every last nerve I had today! But just like you are re-training yourself to dislike the thought of cake and ice cream using the vinegar.....maybe you BOTH need tools to make it work instead of one of you getting tools to get out.

Now that said, I may be all wrong, it would not be the first time. Just please keep your mind open, do not allow a woman you don't know that does not know you, make you rush a decision that could affect the rest of your life.

We kept Connor tonight, Ali had a class to attend, and we were not sure our son should be left in charge of a wild 2 year old! He is hurting pretty bad today---so we sent him home to take a pain pill and we brought the boy home with us. He fell asleep on the drive home, and slept until about 15 minutes before his Mom come----he was no fun!!!

Tomorrow we are going to go cut a load of wood, and then tomorrow night we are going to the fair, I think Hiway 101 is playing---and old band, but hey it is free!!! LOL!! Make my DH dance with me, since we can shine belt buckles again!!! I have not worn a belt in so long it just feels wierd!!!

Y'all enjoy your vinegar!! I am not that brave. I used similar ideas, when I got the cravings that had me hitting the kitchen---I made myself do minimally 5 minutes on the elliptical----eventually it was easier to say nah I don't really want it, so I did not have to get on the damn thing!!!!

I did see HUGE body changes with the free weights. Rick made me this thing that I really need to use again to tone my arms. You take a handle they sell for like a hatchet replacement---or a dowel rod about as big around as a hammer handle. You drill a hole in the middle of it, all the way through. Then take a piece of soft rope about 3 foot long and tie on the handle, and on the bottom of the rope tie a 5lb weight. Hold your arms straight out in front of you with the weight hanging down, and slowly and methodically roll it up til the weight is between your hands, then slowly unwind it back down---do not let it spin down on its own. I could barely do it one time when I started!! Now I can go up and down 3 times in a row. Within a week you will see tone in your lower arms---you can see the muscles working as you do it, and you can feel the burn!!!

WELL worth the work to build it----it was originally made for Rick by a trainer in Denver. I love the results it made!

Haydee, please don't be angry over my honesty. I just know Rick and I both have our faults, but together we have worked through a lot. And we came into this with TONS of baggage each!!!

Hugs!!!!

Kat

[janiebug 0]

Haydee that is interesting what she said. I think it is really nice when someone is on your side like that. My Dr. that did my lap band was on my side and with me. The one that took her place could care less, actually I think he wants me to fail then he would have one less patient. I go to a counselor, to deal with all sorts of things, but I have really been trying to work with her on my weight issues, and I just don't think she knows how. Plus right now she is off till the end of October for maternity. I feel we all need someone in our corner (besides the ever HELPFUL AND WONDERFUL violets!!

I wish you luck Laura in Tunica! I would text you but it takes me sooo long to text. So good luck!!!

I think I am going to visit Kat for a lot of work. It sounds like you are always so busy!! I need you to whip me in shape. Then I am going to go to Judys house and her backyard!! I think over the winter I am going to Pam's house for some warmth. Then in June of next year hopefully we will all get together and see a svelte, relaxed, and warm me!!!

Jane

[Teachlady 3]

Gooooooooooooood morning, Violets!!

It's 5:34 a.m. here and I've been up for an hour already. I'm showered and spiffed up and ready to hit the road to get the grandkids. The Bobster has a funeral tomorrow so he has to be back at the funeral home this evening. It's gonna be a really long day for him. We should be back at Kris's by 1ish and back here by 3. Then I need to make the deviled eggs and baked Beans for tomorrow's cookout. And also chocolate mousse for our fellowship time after church on Sunday.

Everyone have a great day. Catch you all later!!

[Suziecat 379]

:smile:Good Morning Girls,

I stayed up real late last night to watch the girls win Gold and Silver.

Kat, What you told Haydee was exactly what I was thinking.

Looks like we might be able to get into the pool this weekend, it's supposed to get into the mid 80's on Saturday.

Everyone have a great day and I will check in later.

[janiebug 0]

It was exciting to watch those gymnasts do their thing!!! Wow!!

Not real super busy today at work, but tomorrow is crazy!!!!

Good morning Suzie, Haydee, Michelle, Tracyks, TracyK, Judy, Laura, Denise, Jenn, Terry, Pam, and Kat!!

Have a good day!!!

[mdrai 3]

Very interesting, Haydee... thanks for sharing w/us! I'll add "big honkin' tub o' vinegar" to my shopping list!! 20 lbs in 4 weeks?? I'll bite! I don't do weights... guess I should start!

Have fun in Tunica, Laura!

Janie... I think your travel plans sound great! We certainly do have the country covered!

Judy... Enjoy the grandkids!

Hi Suzie, Terri, Tracy, Tracy, Jenn, Kat & PamELa!!

Another day, another list of things to get done... bbl...

[Haydee 2]

Kat - no! don't ever think that I would be angry at ya'll for telling me your honest opinion. Like I said, her prediction took me by surprise. She said that we were going to work on ME and that all she cared about was ME and that sometimes when people start working on themselves and getting to feeling like they matter a whole lot then you start making radical changes in your life. She just wanted me to be aware of that so that I'm not surprised when I start having these feeling of empowerment. I honestly truly do want to make things work with Juan, but only if he's willing to to. We both have issues and luckily she is a intimacy counselor too. She said we would bring him into our sessions later on but for now we will work on ME. One thing that I have noticed though is that since I am slowly changing my attitude, his has changed too. So that's a big plus!

Suzie - yes, it scared me too. I wanted to cry. But I'm keeping an open mind and not rushing into anything... I love him with all my heart but one thing she did tell me is that I have to love myself just as much or more...

Terry - her office is in the village. Kirby and Rice Blvd. She charges $120 per hour. You would like her. She reminds me of you. No bullshit.

Jane - you really should try to find someone that's available now to help you. You know we're all rooting for you here but sometimes we listen better when it's one on one.

Laura - I did want to hear it! I just didn't want to follow your advice, he he he. But that is one thing that I am exploring with Mary Jo. Why I continue to stay even though I've been treated like this for so long... She thinks I'm addicted to him. She just touched on that because she said we weren't going to get into Juan too much for a few more sessions...

I'm going to get another book. Someone on here mentioned it before. Face the fear or something like that?? I'm going to look for it on Amazon...

[TracyinKS 7]

GOOD MORNING!

Haydee: WOW! How cool! I love MJ on the show, but the part they show is her being more mushy and not so straightforward. I think she said all those things for the shock value, much like the shocking taste of Vinegar... GOOD sugestion.. I may well try it too! FUNNY that Laura our picky eater LIKES vinegar.. ROFLAO!

I am considering going into a degree completion program.... scares me to death, but I know that I need it, so that more doors will be open to me. I am not really good at the online stuff because I get more stimulation from class interaction but one of those ONE DAY, ONE NIGHT, Saturday Alright, might be the ticket.. a blended approach....

I LOVE and I mean LOVE my hair!

Gotta go for now...

KISSES to EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!