Feelin' down and frustrated need support, please

[jfran 0]

So, I should be thankful and feel fabulous over the 77lb weight loss I have had these past 7 months, but I can only think and worry over the last 40lbs I have to lose. It is like I have to fight for every ounce that comes off my body these days and I am tired. I am physically and emotionally beat down. I am tired of spending 2-3 hours of my life everyday working out at the gym. And, it sucks that my friends can all go out for pizza and mexican and I can't "afford" the calories.

I am very goal oriented and very driven to lose this weight which I guess is a good thing, but I think I am becoming obessive about it. I want to lose 100% of my excess weight by my one year band anniversary in May. That is 5 months to lose 40lbs and I am scared that I won't make it. I feel like I am on a deadline because I guess I have lived so long without really living that I am anxious to start my life as a thin person.

Some of you may say to relax, give it time, and get a fill, but I don't want to get a fill. For me, the band itself has been my motivator and the fills have only been the last result. I have only had 2 fills in 7 months and I like knowing that the weight I am losing is because of my hard work and my healthy choices and not just because I am so tight I can't eat. I like being normal and being able to eat a normal portion of a variety of foods (there hasn't been anything I can't eat---I just don't because of calories). I have told very few people about my surgery and those that don't know don't suspect a thing and are so proud of me for losing the weight.

I guess I just needed a place to vent and some words of encouragement. If anyone has any plateau buster tips I would love to hear about them. It just seem that I am doing everything right and the weight is just not coming off. Instead I just fluctuate up and down

4-5lbs. Thanks for listening and congratulations on everyones weight loss successes (I guess I should include myself in this compliment, but it is hard to accept).

jfran

[OH Juli 15]

Whew girl...slow down.

Yeah you!!! you've lost 77 pounds in 7 months.

You're missing friends.

You're missing your life because you think there is a start and an end to skinny and fat.

Might I suggest that you think of this as a spectrum where once you LIVED at 262 and you are in the process of getting to life around 150. At 185ish you are still the same gal you were at 262 and will be at 150. Cute and fun and motivated. You'll certainly have different goals...and goals are good like wanting to be at 150 by your anniversary, but you are putting so much energy on that you are missing the joy of the journey.

Also, that goal is so weighted that should you not make it your head might just pop off you neck! And what good will that do you?

I don't want to say work out less and be with friends more, learn how to go out to restaurants and still be responsible, because that's not what you want to hear. But what you can do is up your Water consumption and find a different work out. How long has your weight flucuated? I've found that mine no longer is a sharp downward slope of 10 pounds per month but a more generally downward trend of 5 pounds per month. I think things change up after a half of year or so of doing being the same.

You are doing a stellar job! Be kinder to yourself.

[TracyinKS 7]

I agree with Julie!

Don't beat yourself up, because you are setting brain up for failure and a backslide........

You are doing what your supposed to be doing.. give your body a chance to catch up with itself..... and by all means.. GO OUT FOR MEXICAN! chicken Tortilla Soup is one of my favs! LIVE YOUR LIFE! YOU ARE LOOKING HOT.. shakeit shakeit shakeit!

[jfran 0]

Juli and Tracy: thanks for the kind words. I don't know why I beat myself up. I guess I still have some emotional issues regarding my weight.

Juli: my weight has been fluctuating for a month now and I guess I should just get a fill and keep exercising.

[Crishell 0]

Don't beat yourself up.Good to hear that someone else is feeling the same as i am. I think of myself as very goal oriented too and I want to be successful at this venture. My 40th birthday is August 14 and i want to lose 30 more pounds before then. But I have also plateaued weight loss wise (although still losing inches) and it is driving me crazy. Been in a plateau for like past almsot 3 months playing with the same 4-5 pounds same as you. I feel very frustrated and it is a daily struggle for it not get the best of me. I have gone back and re-evaluated my food intake, exercise and all to see what I am doing wrong and I cannot come up with anything major although I have made more of an effort to increase my Protein to see if that helps. My New Year's resolution was to start going out more and obsess less about a pound, protein, etc.While I am happy & grateful for the weight I have lost, seems like the past year my life became the scale, counting calories, working out at Curves, going to work and it never ends. So you and I must make a pact to have some fun, relax and enjoy life.

[OH Juli 15]

Juli and Tracy: thanks for the kind words. I don't know why I beat myself up. I guess I still have some emotional issues regarding my weight.

Juli: my weight has been fluctuating for a month now and I guess I should just get a fill and keep exercising.

I've gotten two fills and am on the same page as you about wanting to eat bits of everything. I don't like being too filled either.

But you might want to think about getting another one. As you get smaller so does your stomach so the band isn't as snug...What exercising are you doing? Can you change that up? Take a different class, set some stupendous goal like running a marathon or something?

You are doing mighty fine. I understand the frustration though. I missed my 199# by 2008 goal...but I have to say 2007 was an amazing year.

[mktzfla 0]

JFran-

I would give anything to be at your place in your weight loss. In fact, can you tell me what you are eating, how often, etc. that would be great!! I was banded on Nov. 1st. I had my first fill on 12/17 and have my second one tomorrow. I lost 18 lbs preop and not only have I not lost any more weight I have gained about 7 back! EEEEKKK. I am hoping my 2nd fill tomorrow helps but I need some guidance. I, too, am down because it has been 2 months since my surgery and nothing is moving on the scale. I can eat like a horse and really want to feel full.

I don't want you to feel down because there are people that are behind you and are looking for your guidance and what you have been doing right all along. Congrats and know that we are all feeling frustration from time to time. We are all in it together.

[juliegeraci 7]

Recommit yourself today. You can do it!

[violeteyes37 0]

Reading your post and the response that you received has helped me also. We were banded on the same day and our weight loss is about the same. Not only that but Im going thru the same thing. I have also plateaued and its driving me insane. I think at this point it has got to be just the bodys normal response to slow down. What we have to do is not lose our focus and remember that this is for life, not just something we are going to accomplish within a year. I have the rest of my life to get into shape and stay that way.

[maryrose 2]

Jfran,

I really feel for you! Give yourself a break and let the band do it's work for YOU for a change. I really think you need to stop beating yourself up...and get yourself a fill...just a small one. It may be just the thing you need.

[jfran 0]

I've gotten two fills and am on the same page as you about wanting to eat bits of everything. I don't like being too filled either.

But you might want to think about getting another one. As you get smaller so does your stomach so the band isn't as snug...What exercising are you doing? Can you change that up? Take a different class, set some stupendous goal like running a marathon or something?

You are doing mighty fine. I understand the frustration though. I missed my 199# by 2008 goal...but I have to say 2007 was an amazing year.

Juli: I am exercising 2-3 hours 6-7 days a week doing the eliptical, treadmill, arctrainer, strength/weight training (3 days) and an occasional aerobics class. I honestly don't know what more I could do. Maybe I am doing too much.

I think I just have to come to peace with it and get a small fill.

[jfran 0]

JFran-

I would give anything to be at your place in your weight loss. In fact, can you tell me what you are eating, how often, etc. that would be great!! I was banded on Nov. 1st. I had my first fill on 12/17 and have my second one tomorrow. I lost 18 lbs preop and not only have I not lost any more weight I have gained about 7 back! EEEEKKK. I am hoping my 2nd fill tomorrow helps but I need some guidance. I, too, am down because it has been 2 months since my surgery and nothing is moving on the scale. I can eat like a horse and really want to feel full.

I don't want you to feel down because there are people that are behind you and are looking for your guidance and what you have been doing right all along. Congrats and know that we are all feeling frustration from time to time. We are all in it together.

mktzfla: I am eating 5-6 small meals a day (around 200-300 calories per "meal") I drink about a gallon or more of Water a day. I eat fruit with 4 meals and veggies and salads with 2-3 of the meals. I limit the carbs to whole grains and eat tons of chicken and fish.

I exercise 2-3 hours 6 days a week mostly cardio with 3 days of weight training. I eat "healthy" 98% of the time and when I eat bad I go to the gym and burn it off. I a little mental about it all. I have become addicted to exercising and when I miss a day I feel guilty and scared that I will gain the weight back.

So take what I say with a grain of salt. Increase the intervals you eat (increases metabolism) and increase the exercise, but try not to become too obesssive like me.

Thanks for your kind words. It makes me feel great to know that I am inspiring others.

[jfran 0]

Violeteyes37: glad to hear I am not the only one in this boat. Let me know if you find anything that works. I am going to break down and get a small fill on tuesday.

Maryrose: I will try not to beat myself up, but being frustrated is frustrating. I am making steps toward positive thinking. I have made 4 dozen signs with positive phrases like "your beautiful", "you are strong" "love yourself" "embrace your success" and have posted them everywhere. Maybe if I read it enough I will believe it.

[jfran 0]

Don't beat yourself up.Good to hear that someone else is feeling the same as i am. I think of myself as very goal oriented too and I want to be successful at this venture. My 40th birthday is August 14 and i want to lose 30 more pounds before then. But I have also plateaued weight loss wise (although still losing inches) and it is driving me crazy. Been in a plateau for like past almsot 3 months playing with the same 4-5 pounds same as you. I feel very frustrated and it is a daily struggle for it not get the best of me. I have gone back and re-evaluated my food intake, exercise and all to see what I am doing wrong and I cannot come up with anything major although I have made more of an effort to increase my Protein to see if that helps. My New Year's resolution was to start going out more and obsess less about a pound, Protein, etc.While I am happy & grateful for the weight I have lost, seems like the past year my life became the scale, counting calories, working out at Curves, going to work and it never ends. So you and I must make a pact to have some fun, relax and enjoy life.

I am going to attempt to have some fun tomorrow. I am going to the movies and I may even have a "little" popcorn? ??!!!!!

We can do this!

[OH Juli 15]

Jfran-

You are beautiful

You are motivational

You are succeeding

You are smart

You are witty

You are loved

And you will continue to be all these things.

Happy weekend,

Juli