"You're wasting away"

[Spinoza 1,489]

"Unfortunately, so many people think they have a right to comment on our bodies"

I think that's the take home message here.

Some people are well-meaning, some people aren't. Either way it doesn't give them the right to say whatever is in their heads about us without considering what the effect of hearing that might be. I have been beaten into a corner by those both when I was obese and now that I'm not.

The furthest I go with commenting on the appearance of people in my life is to tell them they're looking good. And that doesn't relate at all to their weight. They're almost always looking good to me 🤩

[Lilia_90 604]

I had a colleague come up to me during my coffee break and hovering over my head saying "can I ask you a question?" and I instantly knew what he was going to say, and he goes "are you okay? You look really thin and frail these days" he is a sweetheart and he is someone I have worked with a long time ago and have great rapport with, so I just smiled and told him yes I am okay and thanked him for his concern.

Not a day goes by that I don't receive comments from multiple people on my physical appearance. How thin I look, how awesome I look ...etc. and it's just a multitude of opinions varying from you look awesome to are you sure you're not terminally ill? I asked my husband the other day if he thinks I look like death and he goes you look like a sports illustrated model, which at the end of the day, is the only opinion I value besides my own opinion of myself. People see it as drastic weight loss, I see it as one of the greatest successes of my life, using a tool that helped me lose weight and running with it resulting in great satisfaction and a much healthier body image.

I don't take these comments to heart, I look and feel great, and often think that most of these comments aren't personal, they are probably the byproduct of shock. Yes a fraction of them are ill-intended but then again, why should they matter to me? The good and bad, they're just opinions and they belong to others, not me.

Edited December 10, 2024 by Lilia_90

[ShoppGirl 5,067]

On 12/5/2024 at 2:21 PM, BigSue said:

This is kind of a random anecdote, but I recently went to a new doctor who noted on my chart that I was "ill-appearing," citing "temporal wasting." I had never seen that term before, so I googled it, and it means a hollow look on the temples of the face, which can be a sign of malnutrition (but also just aging and weight loss). Maybe an interesting point that there are some legit signs that doctors look for to indicate illness, and perhaps laypeople pick up on it subconsciously to get the sense that you look unwell.

You remind me of years ago I had to get some medical records to take to another office and I skimmed over it and the doctor had referred to me as a well nourished female. I just thought that was a pretty nice way to say overweight.

[Bypass2Freedom 959]

13 hours ago, ShoppGirl said:

You remind me of years ago I had to get some medical records to take to another office and I skimmed over it and the doctor had referred to me as a well nourished female. I just thought that was a pretty nice way to say overweight.

A well nourished female 😂 I have never heard that one before!