I mean, at this point I give up trying to figure it out...

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,637]

Ok what??? HOW??? I was staying between 177-179 for the last few weeks so I thought I was FINALLY at the place my body was setting at. Apparently not!!! I've even increased how often I eat. But it seems like the more I eat, the more I lose. The less I eat, that's when my weight stays pretty much the same. And that seems pretty messed up to me. So I have to starve myself to STOP losing weight but if I eat well I'll keep going lower??? What??? I don't WANT to go lower. I was supposed to stop at 190!! Make it make sense, cuz the math ain't mathin. Just had blood work done. Other than being anemic (thanks lupus!!) everything was normal, including my thyroid.

My nutritionist and I got my calories up to 1600 per day when not working out and 1800 when I am. Protein up to 90g on non work out days and 120g on work out days. Carbs are trickier since I'm super sensitive to them, but we got them up to 35g on non work out days (up from 20-25) and 45g on work out days (up from 35). Healthy fats we upped to 70g on non work out days and 100g on work out days. My fluids are always good. Normally I drink around 80 fl oz on non work out days and 100+ on work out days, which 20 of those being an electrolyte drink like Prime hydration, Propel, or Gatorade zero.

Being that I'm 2 years and 4 months removed from my 1st surgery and 1 year and 2 months removed from my revision, she's really surprised that I'm still losing. I said "You and me both, lady. Now how do I make it stop?" She said to just keep doing what I'm doing and hopefully my body will eventually hit it's set point and stop on its own. Um...what?? I'm now 15 pounds below my goal. I understand the whole "bounce back weight gain" or whatever it is, but that can't happen until my body finally picks a weight to settle at.

I really don't like how I look at this point, and it's frustrating that nothing fits...again. I know it seems crazy to complain about this kind of thing, and believe me, I never EVER thought I would be the one doing it. But something's gotta give, you know? I'm really starting to look sickly, and in my line of work, that's not a good thing at all.

Edited August 25 by SleeveToBypass2023

[NickelChip 1,255]

I think the experience you're having emphasizes that a lot of this not as much in our control as we think it is. Which I'm sure is no more comforting for you than it is when someone is following every single rule and staying stalled at a higher weight than they had hoped. If it helps, remember that this stage is temporary. You won't keep losing forever, and when your body reaches its new set point, whatever it is, how you carry that weight is going to change. I know you probably look in the mirror and think what have I done, I'm going to look sickly forever, but it's temporary (and probably something you notice more than other people do). Whether your weight increases in the next year, or if it just turns out that your new, lower weight begins to look more natural to you as fat gets redistributed, this is only a brief point in the journey. The clothing not fitting part must be particularly frustrating, though, since it costs money to fix. I hope you're able to find an inexpensive solution, especially for your work clothing. You're sure to find your equilibrium soon.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,637]

1 hour ago, NickelChip said:

I think the experience you're having emphasizes that a lot of this not as much in our control as we think it is. Which I'm sure is no more comforting for you than it is when someone is following every single rule and staying stalled at a higher weight than they had hoped. If it helps, remember that this stage is temporary. You won't keep losing forever, and when your body reaches its new set point, whatever it is, how you carry that weight is going to change. I know you probably look in the mirror and think what have I done, I'm going to look sickly forever, but it's temporary (and probably something you notice more than other people do). Whether your weight increases in the next year, or if it just turns out that your new, lower weight begins to look more natural to you as fat gets redistributed, this is only a brief point in the journey. The clothing not fitting part must be particularly frustrating, though, since it costs money to fix. I hope you're able to find an inexpensive solution, especially for your work clothing. You're sure to find your equilibrium soon.

Thank you It's frustrating because for nearly 26 years, all I wanted in the world was to be thin an healthy again. And now that I am, I'm complaining because I'm too thin. But I'm getting a lot of comments about looking sickly and boney and too skinny. And I agree. I can see and feel my bones sticking out. My husband and kids hug me and they feel my bones and tell me I feel like I'm gonna break if they squeeze me because I feel fragile now. I look like I'm losing muscle, and frankly, I feel really weak compared to how I use to feel. I have permanent circles under my eyes. My hands and feet are boney and veiny and my skin literally hangs off my body, including my face. I'm always tired, even though I get plenty of sleep. And my clothes and rings literally hang off me. Nothing fits at all. I'm always hungry, no matter how much I eat, no matter how often I eat, and no matter WHAT I eat. I'm just praying that things start to even out soon. This is a really slippery slope, and I could find myself in disordered eating territory really easily since I only seem to hold on to weight when I restrict my eating. I don't want to get into doing that and have that become my new norm.

[ShoppGirl 4,879]

Have you been to your family dr to make sure that they tested for everything they should have? The biggest part of me thinks that your body just wants to be at a little lower weight than you want it to and that you will get settled at a new set point soon but if you truly feel like something isn’t right, maybe it doesn’t have to do with the surgery. It seems like something would pop up in the normal labs but maybe there is something that your surgeon is missing that needs a specific test. It may end up being fruitless but it’s just a thought.

[MrsFitz 441]

It must be really difficult to get your head around at the moment, especially if you’ve had a past where you could put weight ON with no effort and now you’re at the opposite end where you’re getting weight off with no effort either 😮

I can feel your frustration with this part of your journey and I wish I had an answer for you. Have lots of hugs and I hope that your body will stop causing you stress and will finally settle down.

[Lilia_90 493]

I think for your height, you can afford lose more and not have a health problem (meaning being underweight or under BMI 18.5). I am now at a BMI 19 and my weight loss is going strong no matter what I do (mind you I am 24 lbs under goal), so I gave up trying to do anything about it 🤷‍♀️

The more I try to stop it the more it doesn't lol, so I don't really stress about it much and I am letting my body do its thing because I know while losing weight is a breeze and unintentional now, it won't be in a few years so a little cushion and wriggle room isn't bad, unless I drop to BMI lower than 18.5 then I will do what is needed and see my surgeon.

I say, let your body do its thing as long as you're healthy, eating well, working out and your blood work is fine. Congratulations on your success ❤️

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,637]

3 hours ago, Lilia_90 said:

I think for your height, you can afford lose more and not have a health problem (meaning being underweight or under BMI 18.5). I am now at a BMI 19 and my weight loss is going strong no matter what I do (mind you I am 24 lbs under goal), so I gave up trying to do anything about it 🤷‍♀️

The more I try to stop it the more it doesn't lol, so I don't really stress about it much and I am letting my body do its thing because I know while losing weight is a breeze and unintentional now, it won't be in a few years so a little cushion and wriggle room isn't bad, unless I drop to BMI lower than 18.5 then I will do what is needed and see my surgeon.

I say, let your body do its thing as long as you're healthy, eating well, working out and your blood work is fine. Congratulations on your success ❤️

I'm definitely nowhere near an unhealthy bmi ON PAPER, but I also know my body. I can see and feel my bones sticking out. My husband and kids hug me and they feel my bones and tell me I feel like I'm gonna break if they squeeze me because I feel fragile now. I look like I'm losing muscle, and frankly, I feel really weak compared to how I use to feel. I have permanent circles under my eyes. My hands and feet are boney and veiny and my skin literally hangs off my body, including my face. I'm always tired, even though I get plenty of sleep. I'm one of the curvy, big bones girls. I carry my weight in such a way that I can weigh more but not look like it. So right now, I look sickly. But more importantly, I don't feel right. I feel not great, which is the opposite of what I wanted when I started this journey.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,637]

6 hours ago, ShoppGirl said:

Have you been to your family dr to make sure that they tested for everything they should have? The biggest part of me thinks that your body just wants to be at a little lower weight than you want it to and that you will get settled at a new set point soon but if you truly feel like something isn’t right, maybe it doesn’t have to do with the surgery. It seems like something would pop up in the normal labs but maybe there is something that your surgeon is missing that needs a specific test. It may end up being fruitless but it’s just a thought.

I just had my 1 year blood work done for the bariatric surgeon, and everything came back normal except the fact that I'm anemic (that's nothing new, thanks to my systemic lupus). Here's what I had done:

Vitamin D, 25-HYDROXY

Vitamin B12

Vitamin A

TSH

VITAMIN B1 (THIAMINE), WHOLE BLOOD

LIPID PANEL

PREALBUMIN

Iron PROFILE

HEMOGLOBIN A1C

FOLATE

FERRITIN

COMPREHENSIVE METABOLIC PANEL

CBC WITH DIFFERENTIAL

My PCP also got the results and said she was happy with them and set me up with another iron infusion (I have to get them twice per year). My surgeon was happy with the results and said sometimes our bodies just do what they're going to do and we're along for the ride. He said if I get tot he point that I physically can't function because of the weight loss, then he'll look into ordering additional testing, but as of right now, while it's unusual to still be losing at this stage, it's not unheard of so he's not particularly concerned. It's nice that HE'S not, but nobody seems to take into account that I AM. I keep explaining how I feel, how I look, how I don't have energy or strength, how I'm losing muscle, how I'm always so so tired, how I can't shake the circles under my eyes or make my skin look healthy no matter how much collagen or serum or cream I use and nobody seems to care. He literally commented on the fact that he could see and feel my bones, ribs, etc... I said "yes, I know. That's my point. Look at my hands and feet. They are bones and veins. No fat at all." And he said it would even out in time. But all that's been happening is I've been getting smaller and smaller the more time goes by.

Edited August 26 by SleeveToBypass2023

[NickelChip 1,255]

To speak to the bones sticking out part, I am roughly the same size as you (5'6" and 180 lbs) and yes, when I run my hands along my abdomen, I feel my ribs. And I can see my collar bone prominently. The last time I was this weight I was about 23 years old. And I remembered the other day as I felt a rib and said what the hell is this--that I used to be able to feel my ribs, see my collar bones, feel my hip bones, etc. all the time. Up until my thyroid quit on me in my mid-20s and my weight got into the 190s and then 200s. Associating that with being frail is more a comparison to how your body used to feel because most average weight women have bones that can be felt and no one thinks of them as delicate. Although, have you done a DEXA scan at all? I've been curious to do one to see how close my smart scale is to reality when it comes to muscle mass, fat percentage, etc. Maybe that would either put your mind at ease or give you some data to sway your doctors into running different tests? They're a little pricey, but I was thinking I might do one at my 1-year surgiversary.

As for the tiredness and the circles under your eyes, I have that too. But I've also noticed that every other woman I know has the same, no matter what her weight. I'm not sure about your age or how much you have going on in your life right now, but I'm 50 years old with two teenagers who participate in enough after school activities that it's a part time job just to drive them there. Plus, I'm a single parent the past four years and their father has been unemployed long-term, so the stress is way up there. After almost 6 months of no caffeine, I started drinking tea in the mornings again and my brain fog is doing much better. So, while I would definitely be diligent in advocating for tests to figure out what is going on (especially since the universe seems to have chosen you pretty frequently for "almost unheard of, weird medical side effects") I'd also take stock of the stuff going on in your life that would make anyone feel run down and not their best.

All of which is to say, hopefully you can find the balance between worrying about the things that need worried about and letting go of the things that will sort themselves out in time.

[catwoman7 11,216]

it should stop. Mine kept dropping until I was in the 130's - and I was really getting scared. But it stopped and I quickly bounced back into the mid-140s. It gradually increased during years 3 and 4 until I was around 170 (have lost some since then - intentionally because I was afraid it would keep heading up, and I already was looking heavier than I wanted to). It'll eventually stop - and you're very likely to have a rebound (most of us do), and you'll probably end up about where you want it to - and/or where your body feels most comfortable.

[catwoman7 11,216]

also, even before you have a rebound, your fat is going to redistribute, making you look better - less skeletal.

[ShoppGirl 4,879]

2 hours ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

I just had my 1 year blood work done for the bariatric surgeon, and everything came back normal except the fact that I'm anemic (that's nothing new, thanks to my systemic lupus). Here's what I had done:

Vitamin D, 25-HYDROXY

Vitamin B12

Vitamin A

TSH

Vitamin B1 (THIAMINE), WHOLE BLOOD

LIPID PANEL

PREALBUMIN

Iron PROFILE

HEMOGLOBIN A1C

FOLATE

FERRITIN

COMPREHENSIVE METABOLIC PANEL

CBC WITH DIFFERENTIAL

My PCP also got the results and said she was happy with them and set me up with another Iron infusion (I have to get them twice per year). My surgeon was happy with the results and said sometimes our bodies just do what they're going to do and we're along for the ride. He said if I get tot he point that I physically can't function because of the weight loss, then he'll look into ordering additional testing, but as of right now, while it's unusual to still be losing at this stage, it's not unheard of so he's not particularly concerned. It's nice that HE'S not, but nobody seems to take into account that I AM. I keep explaining how I feel, how I look, how I don't have energy or strength, how I'm losing muscle, how I'm always so so tired, how I can't shake the circles under my eyes or make my skin look healthy no matter how much collagen or serum or cream I use and nobody seems to care. He literally commented on the fact that he could see and feel my bones, ribs, etc... I said "yes, I know. That's my point. Look at my hands and feet. They are bones and veins. No fat at all." And he said it would even out in time. But all that's been happening is I've been getting smaller and smaller the more time goes by.

Yes your PCP is happy with those results but did you tell them how you feel? They don’t know to test for something unless they hear the symptoms. I still believe that it’s possible that it is the surgery and that it is going to take some time for your body to adjust and your mind to wrap around the fact that your body is going to have a happy place that may not be exactly where you want it to be. Just as much as some of our bodies stop losing short of our goal no matter how little we seem to eating.

i wouldn’t worry so much about how you look sickly as so many have explained they looked like that for a while too and it stabilizes . BUT, only you know How fatigued you feel and just how off this all is for you. If it’s truly not right then maybe it’s time to “run some more tests” that your surgeon mentioned doing if you can’t function.

If that is what you are trying to describe and he just isn’t listening to you then it’s time to ask another provider and get the tests. Your PCP knows your history better, has more likely had more experience with stuff that is outside of bariatric surgery, and should be willing to do further testing if it’s warranted.

If you don’t feel there is any major issue and just want to vent about how you don’t like the way you look and the comments you are getting that is perfectly fine and we are here to support you in that too, but if you are trying to say that you know it’s not right and he is dismissing you then my suggestion is to look elsewhere for someone that will Help.

Edited August 26 by ShoppGirl

[AmberFL 817]

I have no where near the same amount post op but I am finding if I eat more I still lose. If I don't eat as much I lose, I upped my carbs as well. Nothing. I am so thin...I feel like I can I wash my laundry on my ribs. I am in the same boat. I am not trying to actively trying to lose more I am trying to maintain but I just wanted to say solidary girl. I hope you find your answers and feel and look the way you want! ❤️

[Lilia_90 493]

4 hours ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

I'm definitely nowhere near an unhealthy bmi ON PAPER, but I also know my body. I can see and feel my bones sticking out. My husband and kids hug me and they feel my bones and tell me I feel like I'm gonna break if they squeeze me because I feel fragile now. I look like I'm losing muscle, and frankly, I feel really weak compared to how I use to feel. I have permanent circles under my eyes. My hands and feet are boney and veiny and my skin literally hangs off my body, including my face. I'm always tired, even though I get plenty of sleep. I'm one of the curvy, big bones girls. I carry my weight in such a way that I can weigh more but not look like it. So right now, I look sickly. But more importantly, I don't feel right. I feel not great, which is the opposite of what I wanted when I started this journey.

Are you consistently taking your Vitamins? What about Iron? I felt extremely exhausted until I started my iron supplements although I wasn’t anemic or anything, on the lower side of iron reserves. Also, make sure to take your Multivitamin and Omega 3 daily as they really made a difference in how I felt. I used to literally feel dizzy as soon as I’ve gotten up. I also eat every 1.5 hours if I’m not busy. I would also suggest upping your carb intake slowly because carbs make all the difference in our energy levels. I really hope you find your sweet spot, but also don’t fight it too much! I wish you the best ♥️

[ms.sss 15,668]

...but how do you FEEL? (it sounds like your med team is not so very concerned..?)

put aside outside (non-medical-professional) comments and opinions, and even your own assessment of what you see in the mirror...

do you FEEL good? do you have energy? can you go about your day physically unhindered or diminished?

if yes, you are probably best served by working on the mental self work vs the physical stuff.

easy to say, i know.

you've done awesome, and in my insignificant opinion, you don't look sickly nor bony to me in your (clothed) pics.

but i just suggested to block out others comments so ignore me! lol

good luck!

p.s. again, in my insignificant (non-medical) opinion: for someone your current height, weight, and reported activity level, 1600-18000 cals at 35g of carbs is weight loss level cals/macros. 🤷🏻‍♀️