I mean, at this point I give up trying to figure it out...

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,603]

7 hours ago, ms.sss said:

...but how do you FEEL? (it sounds like your med team is not so very concerned..?)

put aside outside (non-medical-professional) comments and opinions, and even your own assessment of what you see in the mirror...

do you FEEL good? do you have energy? can you go about your day physically unhindered or diminished?

if yes, you are probably best served by working on the mental self work vs the physical stuff.

easy to say, i know.

you've done awesome, and in my insignificant opinion, you don't look sickly nor bony to me in your (clothed) pics.

but i just suggested to block out others comments so ignore me! lol

good luck!

p.s. again, in my insignificant (non-medical) opinion: for someone your current height, weight, and reported activity level, 1600-18000 cals at 35g of carbs is weight loss level cals/macros. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'm a lot weaker than I used to be. I've been losing a lot of strength. I'm always tired and super fatigued. I'm losing muscle. I'm losing stamina. I'm getting more headaches. Not to mention how bony and veiny I look. My clothes and jewelry literally hang on me. I'm noticing I'm achy more often, such as muscles and joints. I take my Vitamins everyday. I take an Iron supplement but now need to start my iron infusions again.

[ShoppGirl 4,790]

50 minutes ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

I'm a lot weaker than I used to be. I've been losing a lot of strength. I'm always tired and super fatigued. I'm losing muscle. I'm losing stamina. I'm getting more headaches. Not to mention how bony and veiny I look. My clothes and jewelry literally hang on me. I'm noticing I'm achy more often, such as muscles and joints. I take my Vitamins everyday. I take an Iron supplement but now need to start my Iron infusions again.

Honestly if them iron infusions don’t make you feel a lot better I would just check in with my primary provider. It sounds like the physical symptoms are enough to warrant at least asking to me. I mean you have been on here a while and you weren’t complaining of these physical things the whole time. Assuming they are new or worse and this troubling I think it’s worth a second opinion. You have been through so much I really hope you get it sorted out soon ❤️‍🩹

Edited August 27 by ShoppGirl

[ms.sss 15,585]

1 hour ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

I'm a lot weaker than I used to be. I've been losing a lot of strength. I'm always tired and super fatigued. I'm losing muscle. I'm losing stamina. I'm getting more headaches. Not to mention how bony and veiny I look. My clothes and jewelry literally hang on me. I'm noticing I'm achy more often, such as muscles and joints. I take my Vitamins everyday. I take an Iron supplement but now need to start my Iron infusions again.

ah, then i totally misunderstood. my bad, sorry! i was under the impression you were feeling healthy...i see know that you are totally not.

with all your ailments, i would go back to your doctor and request some help! not sure this is something your nutritionist can take help you more than you doc can with if all your labs coming back satisfactorily..(besides the anemia, but this is par for course as you mentioned...)

(also. maybe cut back on the workouts until you regain your strength??)

[Arabesque 7,245]

I’m wondering if you still aren’t eating enough for your current height, weight, and activity. I eat about 1600 calories to maintain and am shorter & weigh less than you & I’m not active at all. I mean my stretches and resistance band use burns nothing really. So I’d expect I would need fewer calories to maintain my current weight than you yet your non workout days you eat the same. Yea I am making a generalisation and we are different but ut is something to consider.

I’ve linked a BMR calculator below which may give you an idea of the number of calories you may need to be consuming and it maybe something to discuss with your nutritionalist.

I get the looking tired and unwell. My uncle told my mum I looked like death when I first stabilised. A few months later he was telling me & my mum how great I was looking. Give it time.

PS - I too was wondering if you need to take a break from your workouts like @ms.sss suggested or reduce the frequency or intensity.

https://www.calculator.net/bmr-calculator.html?cage=45&csex=f&cheightfeet=5&cheightinch=5&cpound=175&cheightmeter=180&ckg=60&cmop=0&coutunit=c&cformula=m&cfatpct=20&ctype=standard&x=Calculate

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,603]

17 minutes ago, Arabesque said:

I’m wondering if you still aren’t eating enough for your current height, weight, and activity. I eat about 1600 calories to maintain and am shorter & weigh less than you & I’m not active at all. I mean my stretches and resistance band use burns nothing really. So I’d expect I would need fewer calories to maintain my current weight than you yet your non workout days you eat the same. Yea I am making a generalisation and we are different but ut is something to consider.

I’ve linked a BMR calculator below which may give you an idea of the number of calories you may need to be consuming and it maybe something to discuss with your nutritionalist.

I get the looking tired and unwell. My uncle told my mum I looked like death when I first stabilised. A few months later he was telling me & my mum how great I was looking. Give it time.

PS - I too was wondering if you need to take a break from your workouts like @ms.sss suggested or reduce the frequency or intensity.

https://www.calculator.net/bmr-calculator.html?cage=45&csex=f&cheightfeet=5&cheightinch=5&cpound=175&cheightmeter=180&ckg=60&cmop=0&coutunit=c&cformula=m&cfatpct=20&ctype=standard&x=Calculate

I only work out 2 days per week now because I work on my feet as a medical assistant 5 days per week, but I think I'll back off those for a bit and see if that helps at all. I hadn't even thought about that, to be honest, because I was working out 5-6 days per week and had to cut back to 2, so I figured that was already a huge drop. But being on my feet all day moving and working with patients is probably enough right now.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,603]

1 hour ago, ms.sss said:

ah, then i totally misunderstood. my bad, sorry! i was under the impression you were feeling healthy...i see know that you are totally not.

with all your ailments, i would go back to your doctor and request some help! not sure this is something your nutritionist can take help you more than you doc can with if all your labs coming back satisfactorily..(besides the anemia, but this is par for course as you mentioned...)

(also. maybe cut back on the workouts until you regain your strength??)

Nothing to apologize for at all. I've been complaining about how I feel AND look, so you didn't really misunderstand I was feeling great for quite a while, but as my weight continued to drop, I started to feel worse. Once I went below 180, it really started to go downhill. But i was ok at around 182-185, which is why I wanted to get back to that weight. But nothing I do gets me there. I think I'll demand my doctor really listen to me and do some additional testing. I've been saying all of this to her and I feel like I'm talking to a wall for all the good it's doing me.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,603]

2 hours ago, ShoppGirl said:

Honestly if them Iron infusions don’t make you feel a lot better I would just check in with my primary provider. It sounds like the physical symptoms are enough to warrant at least asking to me. I mean you have been on here a while and you weren’t complaining of these physical things the whole time. Assuming they are new or worse and this troubling I think it’s worth a second opinion. You have been through so much I really hope you get it sorted out soon ❤️‍🩹

I get the iron infusions yearly because the anemia is chronic due to my lupus. Been this way since I was a teenager. I don't feel a lot different after them, but it is what it is. I felt good when I weighted between 182-185, but once I went below 180, that's when I started feeling like crap. And no matter what I say to my doctor, it's like I'm not saying anything at all. She isn't taking me seriously because my labs are fine. It's really irritating me!!

[ShoppGirl 4,790]

5 minutes ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

I get the Iron infusions yearly because the anemia is chronic due to my lupus. Been this way since I was a teenager. I don't feel a lot different after them, but it is what it is. I felt good when I weighted between 182-185, but once I went below 180, that's when I started feeling like crap. And no matter what I say to my doctor, it's like I'm not saying anything at all. She isn't taking me seriously because my labs are fine. It's really irritating me!!

Yea. Sometimes you get a doctor that just doesn’t really listen for whatever reason. For me at this point I would give them one last chance and ask what tests they were referring to earlier just in case they are specific to the surgery. Then say okay let’s do them. If they won’t then speak with another Dr and see what they say they think it could be. I wouldn’t tell them what The other Dr thinks until after you get their opinion. Then say you would like to know if they think the other tests are warranted and ask them to do both. Sometimes you have to tell them that you are over it and want to just do the tests and be done with it. I’m really sorry that you are not being heard when you tell this person how you are feeling. I can only imagine how infuriating this must be for you. Just don’t give up. Advocate for yourself as you would for one of your patients. I really do hope you get to the bottom of it soon. You deserve to enjoy the life you are working so hard for.

[MrsFitz 440]

1 hour ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

I get the Iron infusions yearly because the anemia is chronic due to my lupus. Been this way since I was a teenager. I don't feel a lot different after them, but it is what it is. I felt good when I weighted between 182-185, but once I went below 180, that's when I started feeling like crap. And no matter what I say to my doctor, it's like I'm not saying anything at all. She isn't taking me seriously because my labs are fine. It's really irritating me!!

Silly question but have you been checked to make sure that your Lupus is behaving?

[Lilia_90 450]

2 hours ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

I only work out 2 days per week now because I work on my feet as a medical assistant 5 days per week, but I think I'll back off those for a bit and see if that helps at all. I hadn't even thought about that, to be honest, because I was working out 5-6 days per week and had to cut back to 2, so I figured that was already a huge drop. But being on my feet all day moving and working with patients is probably enough right now.

Do you track your daily steps? If not maybe you want to wear a sports watch that gives you an idea of what your daily step count is? Walking over 8000 steps a day generally results in expedited weight loss for people in a calorie deficit.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,603]

7 hours ago, ShoppGirl said:

Yea. Sometimes you get a doctor that just doesn’t really listen for whatever reason. For me at this point I would give them one last chance and ask what tests they were referring to earlier just in case they are specific to the surgery. Then say okay let’s do them. If they won’t then speak with another Dr and see what they say they think it could be. I wouldn’t tell them what The other Dr thinks until after you get their opinion. Then say you would like to know if they think the other tests are warranted and ask them to do both. Sometimes you have to tell them that you are over it and want to just do the tests and be done with it. I’m really sorry that you are not being heard when you tell this person how you are feeling. I can only imagine how infuriating this must be for you. Just don’t give up. Advocate for yourself as you would for one of your patients. I really do hope you get to the bottom of it soon. You deserve to enjoy the life you are working so hard for.

Thank you!!! I love evrything about this. I feel like you heard me, and it feels good. I literally got so frustrated trying to explain it to hubby last night that I started to cry, and I NEVER cry. He kept saying "well, just eat more, move less, and try not to think about it so much". I threw a pillow, 2 stuffed animals, and a paperback book at him and told him not to "help" anymore.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,603]

6 hours ago, MrsFitz said:

Silly question but have you been checked to make sure that your Lupus is behaving?

Actually....no. I know my MS is ok right now, but I honestly didn't even think about my lupus being stupid!!! I'm going to call my rheumatologist today. THANK YOU!!!!!

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,603]

6 hours ago, Lilia_90 said:

Do you track your daily steps? If not maybe you want to wear a sports watch that gives you an idea of what your daily step count is? Walking over 8000 steps a day generally results in expedited weight loss for people in a calorie deficit.

No, I don't. I didn't think about that, either. I'm going to look into getting one of those next payday. Now that you mentioned it, I'm curious what my daily steps are. I hadn't given it a single thought. Now I wonder how much actual "working out" I'm doing 5 days per week at work....

[NickelChip 1,215]

19 minutes ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

I'm going to look into getting one of those next payday.

In the meantime, a lot of phones have a step tracking app available, so if you carry your phone with you most of the time, that can be a good estimate. I've compared my Fitbit count to my friend's phone app (hers is one that comes with her iPhone) when we've gone for a walk together and the results were very similar.

[ShoppGirl 4,790]

1 hour ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

Thank you!!! I love evrything about this. I feel like you heard me, and it feels good. I literally got so frustrated trying to explain it to hubby last night that I started to cry, and I NEVER cry. He kept saying "well, just eat more, move less, and try not to think about it so much". I threw a pillow, 2 stuffed animals, and a paperback book at him and told him not to "help" anymore.

I’m assuming he either got the point or a little dizzy 🥴 Poor guys- they really just don’t get us sometimes. They try, bless their hearts, sometimes they just really suck at it. I tell my best girlfriend stuff mine does all the time and sometimes question how my marriage would work if not for her sticking up for him when I go to vent.

One thing I picked up somewhere is that when you talk to your significant other sometimes it’s best to tell them up front if you are just venting and don’t want any solutions. Sometimes we just need someone to listen and give us a hug and that’s really enough. I have told my husband that and he honestly looked relieved that he didn’t have to try and figure out how to respond. 😆