Let's Talk GRIEF! An ongoing thread about bariatric grief!

[Bypass2Freedom 926]

I grieve the connection that food brought between myself and my boyfriend. I didn't even realise how much of our relationship was based around eating together - from ordering dinner in and just cuddling & eating, to him remembering my favourite Snacks and getting them for me on a weekday.

I miss that side of things!

But...now I just need to find other things to enjoy. The snacks he bought me have changed from chocolate to soft drinks (non-fizzy 😂)!

[Mspretty86 393]

43 minutes ago, Bypass2Freedom said:

I grieve the connection that food brought between myself and my boyfriend. I didn't even realise how much of our relationship was based around eating together - from ordering dinner in and just cuddling & eating, to him remembering my favourite Snacks and getting them for me on a weekday.

I miss that side of things!

But...now I just need to find other things to enjoy. The Snacks he bought me have changed from chocolate to soft drinks (non-fizzy 😂)!

Love this! Lol now you all can do healthy cuddle and Chill! Babe bring me a celery stick 😂😂😂. I get it tho!

[Bypass2Freedom 926]

Just now, Mspretty86 said:

Love this! Lol now you all can do healthy cuddle and Chill! Babe bring me a celery stick 😂😂😂. I get it tho!

Oh lord the day I am caught eating a celery stick is the day that it is OVER for me 😂😂

[BlondePatriotInCDA 544]

1 hour ago, Bypass2Freedom said:

Oh lord the day I am caught eating a celery stick is the day that it is OVER for me 😂😂

Lol I tried telling this exact same thing when my dietician suggested celery for when I'm missing a "crunch snack." Yeah...sure thing.

[ms.sss 15,748]

10 hours ago, Lilia_90 said:

I love travel, I love food, I love culinary experiences and I am adamant to not let WLS get in the way of it. It is a tool that should be used to build good habits, which include Portion Control, daily movement and workouts but also freeing your mind of food fear and anxiety.

👆🏼Nailed it! esp the bolded part.

in a way, its the never ending angst and shame spirals (and all the things they bring on) that are the death of us. not the food.

[ms.sss 15,748]

1 hour ago, Bypass2Freedom said:

Oh lord the day I am caught eating a celery stick is the day that it is OVER for me 😂😂

funny raw celery is probably the one thing i purposely pick out of salads or veggie trays just never took to them pre or post wls! i can, however, eat/lick celery salt like its going out of style.

aside:, cooked celery is an abomination and i don't even like to talk about it🤢

[AmberFL 964]

I am in a similar boat as @ms.sss and @Lilia_90 I still enjoy all the foods, Desserts, Mexican food, Chinese, ice cream. Everything in moderation for sure, and I stay very active, I do track all my food and stay within my macros during the week for the most part. But I do eat ice cream every night LOL mostly my Protein ice cream made with my ninja creami but sometimes I will eat off my hubbys Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream. My relationship with food has changed and I worked/ am working really hard to not abuse food like I have before. In my mind this is a life long journey and my life long journey does not look like salads and chicken till I die LOL I am in the same bought with how food brought me and hubs together, getting fast food after the kids went to bed and stuffing ourselves while watching a movie, he is slightly jaded by that and make comments "well you cant eat that anyways, or your going to have bite and waste it" But we have our own thing going on since I have lost all this weight. Anywho! yea! it doesn't have to be so strict forever, but slider foods are a thing and making sure to stay active is important I think.

[Lilia_90 566]

I am nodding my head at all the wisdom above while eating cheesecake (the real deal, not the gross yogurt things they call cheesecake nowadays 🤣🤣).

[AmberFL 964]

18 minutes ago, Lilia_90 said:

I am nodding my head at all the wisdom above while eating cheesecake (the real deal, not the gross yogurt things they call cheesecake nowadays 🤣🤣).

yummm!!!! The greek yogurt cheesecake IS NOT THE SAME! I have made two different kinds and no just no

[Mspretty86 393]

One day I will be as strong as you all, I'm just so happy yall are strong! My Addiction to food was no different then that of one on meth/crack. I'm scared to even indulge 😂🤪

[FifiLux 541]

I miss a stack of pancakes with bacon and maple Syrup, it would always be the Breakfast I would order if staying in a hotel. My favourite food day of the year, after Christmas Day, is pancake Tuesday

I have made my own Protein Powder or oats and banana based pancakes and they have been fine but really miss the crispy bacon 😋 I think I will try one when I am on holidays later this month and see how it goes down.

A big grief of mine at the moment is not being able to trust my stomach at times, in that food may not go down well whereas the same thing was no issue a few days before. It has made me much more wary when eating out.

[BlondePatriotInCDA 544]

2 hours ago, Mspretty86 said:

One day I will be as strong as you all, I'm just so happy yall are strong! My Addiction to food was no different then that of one on meth/crack. I'm scared to even indulge 😂🤪

Same! I worry about the extreme sheet of ice, not just a slippery slope but a full out avalanche watch me tumble and break my neck covered in powdery snow buried in the gaining the weight back full on Mount Everest climb slope!

[BlondePatriotInCDA 544]

6 minutes ago, FifiLux said:

I miss a stack of pancakes with bacon and maple Syrup, it would always be the Breakfast I would order if staying in a hotel. My favourite food day of the year, after Christmas Day, is pancake Tuesday

I have made my own Protein Powder or oats and banana based pancakes and they have been fine but really miss the crispy bacon 😋 I think I will try one when I am on holidays later this month and see how it goes down.

A big grief of mine at the moment is not being able to trust my stomach at times, in that food may not go down well whereas the same thing was no issue a few days before. It has made me much more wary when eating out.

Yes! Its the sneaky unpredictable mood swings of the stomach! Why oh why will it tolerate and dare I say it "enjoy" my avocado one day and the next day its throwing a tantrum?😡 No one ever explained my stomach would suddenly become afflicted by manic mood swings!

Edited September 3, 2024 by BlondePatriotInCDA

[FifiLux 541]

7 minutes ago, BlondePatriotInCDA said:

Yes! Its the sneaky unpredictable mood swings of the stomach! Why oh why will it tolerate and dare I say it "enjoy" my avocado one day and the next day its throwing a tantrum?😡 No one ever explained my stomach would suddenly become afflicted by manic mood swings!

Exactly. I was told some foods may no longer be tolerable but I didn't realise it would change from one day to the next, even one bite to the next.

[Born in Missouri 1,264]

I had my bypass in 2018. Many foods still don't taste the same. My sense of smell and taste never really returned. That alone is worthy of mourning.

I have a problem getting enough Protein and calories. I am currently suffering from anemia (my hemoglobin had dipped to 5.2 at one point, requiring hospital admittance and blood transfusions.) The cause was determined... two ulcers slowly bleeding out.

Eating is a chore... very little pleasure left.