Family Intervention-LapBand Bulimia

[BandaCat 1]

My family just did an intervention on me today. They are very concerned that since getting the LapBand I have become bulimic. I can't say I completely disagree. I'm writing this post because I searched for others in the same situation and mostly just found people who were justifying all the PBing and vomiting. Maybe there are others in my same situation?

Here's my LapBand journey:

Banded 10/05/06 at 252lbs.

By May 07 was at 192lbs. I spent most of March and all of April and May throwing up daily. Living off of spoonfuls of mayo and chocolate. The only things that would stay down. I knew I needed an unfill but my life was soooooo super busy I didn't choose to see my doctor until June.

June 07 I had most of my fill taken out and spent the whole summer enjoying and maintaining. I had immediately gained back 10lbs once I was able to start eating again. But I didn't care because I was feeling so much better. I maintained at 203 all summer. Only occasional vomiting.

August 07 got engaged and the stress/excitement made me super tight. Vomiting and Reflux for 5 days. Went straight to doctor for complete unfill.

November 07 Got a little fill again and was immediately back to my old ways of vomiting regularly. I kept ignoring it because I knew it was my fault for not following the rules and was certain my band wasn't too tight.

December 07 Reflux started again really bad. Started vomiting blood. That's when I really knew I was going to have to do something serious to get ahold of the vomiting.

I've been on liquids and mushies for 5 days. I haven't vomited for 3 days. Good progress, but I'm gaining weight from the mushies.

So here's what I know:

*I have spent the majority of my 14 months banded vomiting.

*I still eat too fast, overeat, and use food to deal with things.

*My body is getting the effects as if I were bulimic because of all the vomiting.

*I'm not binging and purging on purpose. But I've vomited so much that my body does it without me trying.

I'm not ready to give up on myself with the band, but my family wants me to get it taken out. I've agreed to go to counseling because obviously there are somethings that are keeping me in this destructive behavior. I still have at least 50lbs to lose and I really want to get there. Hopefully the counseling will help me use the band correctly and get through the emotional stuff that is keeping me stuck.

By the way.... I've been on every diet you can imagine since age 8 but NEVER did anything close to bulimia before being banded.

Anyways, just wanted to share. Maybe there are others out there who have felt the same???

[juliegeraci 7]

Bandacat, I don't like the thought of you throwing up blood. I would tell your doctor and have him to a barium swallow to make sure your band is okay. You can have an erosion if it is too tight all the time. You can also get a slip. When I'm tight I vomit sometimes on a daily basis. But I got .3 taken out and only vomit 1-2x a week now. I haven't lost any weight but I am much happier being able to eat healthier. I would stay on liquids, then mushies and solids. I would definitely get into some type of therapy. I can relate about the vomitting. All I have to do is run to the bathroom and it just comes up. When I brush my teeth I can vomit too. I would first heal for a few weeks then go in for a slight adjustment. The key for you will be to eat like a bandster again. Taking very small bites (the size of an eraser or M&M) and eating very slowly. If you do those 2 things you can pretty much tell when you are getting full. Hopefully this will eliminate the need to PB. Also, there is nothing wrong with losing weight slowly. If you can be unfilled and lose 1 lb per week I would stay there. You really risk the chance of a slip when you vomit so much. Hope this helps. Good luck. Julie

[OH Juli 15]

counseling is important.

I'd not give up the band just yet, but you've got something serious going on and need to address that.

In the mean time try to get some real nutrition in you.... Sorry I don't have more to add.

[BandaCat 1]

Things got really bad over the holidays. I've learned that my band gets REALLY tight when I fly and doesn't get better for a few days. I got a complete unfill at the end of December. The doctor recommended not getting filled again until after my wedding which was in February. It's May now and I still am unfilled. I've struggled with gaining weight but the vomiting has drastically improved!!! (I've gained about 5 lbs. Not terrible but I get really nervous watching the scale go up instead of down.) I have struggled with reflux still but not nearly as bad as in the past. My chiropractor put me on some Vitamins that started helping immediately and I can almost say that I'm free of the reflux now! It's awesome. The vitamins help to strengthen my diaphragm which she thinks has gotten all out of whack from all the vomiting and that's where the reflux has come from. Well she must be right because I feel sooooo much better! I am thinking about getting a small fill again to start losing weight again. But we are flying at the end of the month and I know that doesn't work well for me so I will wait until after we get back. So anyways, that's the update. I don't feel like a bulimic anymore. My family still doesn't like the band, but they aren't as concerned as before. I'm still hoping for positive results. For now I just want to get back into Onederland!!

[MerryHearted 20]

I'm so glad to hear things are better!

Have you jumped in on any of the exercise challenges? That might help with maintaining or even losing while not focusing on the food.

Have fun on your trip!!

[jetti 2]

Banda

Its good to read that you are doing much better now. Im sure the weight gain is hard but it probably your body adjusting to eating more and keeping it in. do you work out? that may help you start losing again. you will probably also notice that once your body adjusts that you may start losing again.

good luck with everything

[TulipStar 2]

Hi Banda,

I am glad to hear you are doing better too. Eating disorders and the lap-band is a controversial topic.

My rule of thumb is that if you aren't "planning" to binge and purge and you just PB then it is not the same. With bulimia it is a process of planning what you are going to eat/when, etc and then how/when you are going to purge it. PB's just happen and should be pretty infrequent if you are following the rules.

I hope you can get a slight fill to help you start back on the downward trend

[westcoastmom 3]

It scaries me so much when I read about people PBing and throwing up so much. I hope you can get this under control. I know we all did this to lose weight for our health - but getting healthy has to be the real reason. Total health cannot include all these other things.

Juliegericie - it also scares me that it sounds like you are implying that it is good that you are down to 1-2x per week with these occurances. I just can't imagine that is good for your body either.

These kinds of things make me wonder about the choice of having a lap band. I know getting the weight off if really what I need, but again, we also need to be concered with our overall quality of life.

I don't think these things - even once a week could be good for our body. We have to be careful that we don't sacrifice other things in the pursuit of weight loss.

[BandaCat 1]

Ironically before I got the band I had done 2 triathlons (at over 200lbs) and after the band I haven't exercised barely at all. I just started back at the gym last week and am hoping that will be the key to losing again.

Not sure though. I played competitive sports until my twenties and still struggled with my weight. I mean you would think I would have lost weight while training for the triathlons??? But now that I have the band, maybe the exercise will work since I'm not able to eat as much.

[MerryHearted 20]

These kinds of things make me wonder about the choice of having a lap band. I know getting the weight off if really what I need, but again, we also need to be concered with our overall quality of life.

If it makes you feel any better, I'll hit my 3 yr bandiversary at the end of August and I've never PBd even once so far.

Of course, now that I've said it, I've probably jinxed myself.

Sometimes it just happens though. I agree, if it's a regular occurence then something needs to change. Most people use it as a learning experience to figure out what to do differently, and PBing a few times along the way is considered part of the learning experience of having a band. For most people, there is no stomach acid involved, so it's not as harmful as real puking as far as eroding tooth enamel and whatnot.

[jetti 2]

banda

when you were training for the triathlons were you trying to lose weight? you may have been adding more muscle and that will keep the numbers from going down on the scale. Im a believer in working out with the band helps more then anything. you just have to find something that you enjoy so that gives you a better chance of sticking to it.