I Hate My Band!!!!!!!!

[cookielover 1]

Bandster- I have been right beside you during your journey with the band, as we are part of the Tens. What you have been experiencing with your health has been rough to say the least. (I know all about it, because I read about it on the other board.) I too am a self-pay, and I paid 14,400 for my band. I can only imagine what a disappointment I would feel if I was not losing any weight after shelling out that kind of cash. But I got to thinking, do you think that your tummy issues have anything to do with your weight not moving? The two may be connected.

Your fill is only 2 weeks away- thank goodness. I know it is tough believe me. These bands outta come with complete instruction manuals. For heaven sakes I bought a calculator and my instruction manual is a actual book- I bought this band- and I got a handshake and a "good luck". I am so glad there is LBT, otherwise I would be huddled up in the corner.

Remember we are here for you. We can't fix your money issues, but we can support you.

[Daisalana 33]

Husker has an excellent point!

[bandster_1007 1]

I would like to address what you said about you sleeping on the couch and you and you dh "barely on good speaking terms". No matter how bad it gets, nothing will get better in my home if my dh and I are at odds. When this happens, I don’t care about anything. I don’t care if the house is cleaned, the bills are paid, if I exercise or what goes into my mouth. It will make me sick. You need to work on fixing this. Is there anyway you could have your folks or a friend take your son for a night so you and your dh can have some alone time to talk. When he comes home, meet him at the door, look him in the eyes and say "I love you". Tell him how important he is to you and let him know that nothing else matters but your relationship. Hopefully the conservation will start rolling from there. And no more sleeping on the couch, you belong in the same room as your husband. If you two can work on getting your relationship back where is should be, it would help elevate the "extreme stress" you are under, which in turn should help put everything else in perspective.

Best of luck and know that we are here for you.

thank you..i had already calmed down much this morning, and was thinking of ways to help with things tonight. i know he was surprised of my sleeping on the couch. i'm not one to do that. in hindsight i think that the Migraine i was having was causing me to be sort of overreactive. i am pain free right now (i wasn't when i posted this), and i am already feeling much better.

you are absolutely right, when we are add odds..it seems like the whole world is falling down. we have to learn to talk to each other about what is really stressing us...money, etc., instead of fussing about other things. sometimes it takes us a minute to have a heart to heart (and honestly this is the first time we have ever been this financially tight, so i'm sure it is a learning process).

thank you very much.

[bandster_1007 1]

Bandster- I have been right beside you during your journey with the band, as we are part of the Tens. What you have been experiencing with your health has been rough to say the least. (I know all about it, because I read about it on the other board.) I too am a self-pay, and I paid 14,400 for my band. I can only imagine what a disappointment I would feel if I was not losing any weight after shelling out that kind of cash. But I got to thinking, do you think that your tummy issues have anything to do with your weight not moving? The two may be connected.

yes, i have. i have had a lot of red in my stool (i know tmi), and a lot of cramping, and a lot of fresh blood during movements. i have also been extremely lightheaded..but i'm thinking this will pass and has to do with the previous obstruction. i've heard that if you have backed up bowels it slows down weight loss. it is healing, but it is taking time, so hopefully you are right (and for now i need to cut out the cheese..lol)

Your fill is only 2 weeks away- thank goodness. I know it is tough believe me. These bands outta come with complete instruction manuals. For heaven sakes I bought a calculator and my instruction manual is a actual book- I bought this band- and I got a handshake and a "good luck". I am so glad there is LBT, otherwise I would be huddled up in the corner.

Remember we are here for you. We can't fix your money issues, but we can support you.

you have no idea how much this support means to me. i honestly feel like i just left yoga. sometimes it just takes getting it out...and seeing other's be honest with you and hearing that it will pass. the money issues will be fixed, it's just going to take us time to recuperate, and some serious budget analyzing.

[Daisalana 33]

It's amazing what you discover when you budget!!

I was writing out a budget last month to figure out where our money goes.. and I realized we make a substantial amount a month that is just 'extra money', and yet we never have the 'extra money' when we want it. I still can't figure out where it goes. My only guess is food & cigarettes. I cook more, so we save money from going out to eat, but I swear I spend at least $100 a week getting groceries..and there's only 2 of us!! I'm always stopping on the way home. It seems fresh fruit/veggies/meats that expire, are expensive and have to be replaced so much. I need to come up with a better solution for that.

And I smoke so much more than pre-band, we spend quite a bit of my cigarettes alone.. and DH smokes too, but not as much as I do. If we could kick that habit, we'd be rich hah hah.

[restricted 0]

With all that is going on, it appears what stands out is you aren't benefiting from your band as anticipated. You have my sympathy and compassion. Try to love your husband, without family we really have only ourselves. Beyond that, it appears you require a fill, and no significant weight loss will occur until at least one fill, perhaps more, are provided. The financial stuff will sort itself out, sooner or later, and may be beyond your control.

God bless, and I hope you can find some love and calm in the storm you are experiencing. It sounds as if your husband does love you very much.

[Boysaway 0]

I think you will become friends with your band very son and this time next year you will be posting I LOVE MY BAND!!!

Reconcile yourself to your fill date of 2 January, have a great Christmas and New Year and then knuckle down with your helping hand.

[juliegeraci 7]

This time of the year is especially hard. Please take good care of yourself. Drink plenty of Water, take your Vitamins. Your fill on the 2nd will help. Keep going back as frequently as you need to to find your sweet spot. About the finances. I can relate. I am self pay with my fills which ran me $2k last year. Ugh. My husband is unemployed so it is much tougher on us at $400 a week. He use to bring home $900 a week. I had to take my 6 year old out of daycare, I cancelled the housekeeper and my gym membership. I know it will get better though. I have my band and I eat really healthy so I am very happy. Good luck to you and have a nice Holiday. Julie

[bandster_1007 1]

thank you all for your replies.

sometimes, when you are in the middle of all of the stress the cortisone levels in your body are just so high, that i don't think you think clearly...does that make sense?

i was so stressed yesterday and this morning, and i was thinking all these crazy ideas, and my body was hurting and it was in "fight or flight mode"..haha...then i posted on here...had a heart to heart with a co-worker, and at lunch i went and purchased a card for dh and a package of lifesaver's (cuz he's my lifesaver haha) and took them to his work and put them on his mirror (hope he gets it, i realized he took his key off of my ring because he lost his when i got there). i also called a friend at lunch just to tell her that i miss her and i love her.

and..biggy here..i called my doctor's office and i was in tears on the phone...needing this fill you know.. well, she talked to me for about 7 minutes on the foods that i was eating, and was trying to think of denser stuff. then we talked a bit longer and i said "are you trying to tell me to stop beating myself up and relax"..and she said "yeah, basically. once the weight starts coming off, you won't be able to stop it. be patient, and don't be so hard on yourself, dieting is hard for all of us, that is why we need the band, and your "diet" will not work until you have restriction."...so i felt better.

and i read all of your caring and considerate posts, and i feel better.

[kacee 3]

Dare I say it...it sounds like you hate your life and your band just happens to be the one thing you can blame it on. If you don't follow the "program" you won't lose...period. If you are eating because of stress and you are stressed you guys need to start finding out how to alleviate the stress in your life and stop chewing on each other and pointing blame. Your band is in so you need to start working with it...you made that commitment. If you are finding the whole thing is a big "Oh s&%t" because you didn't anticipate the impact of the payments for it...sounds like you guys should have a lot more pre-planning. It never ceases to amaze me how quickly people find a way to shoot down what they have supposedly been working toward (some for a very long time) and I seem to see more and more folks who within days after getting their bands announce to the world that it was a HUGE mistake and (some) are ready to have it yanked out in the name of "Oh I didn't know it was going to be "like this." Sorry, guys. You can ignore my post. This just gets kindof old to hear all this whining when there are so many people out there who would give their left tit (literally) to be where we are. Nuff said.

[bandster_1007 1]

kacee-thank you for you opinion...

but as i said, i know that i am in a better situation than most..and praise to you if you are always able to keep yourself in the positive light and not fall down into the pits of life. i'm sorry that you feel the way that you do, but it is posts like yours that make those of us who are struggling stay quite.

i said i would rip my band out..but that was due to frustration, and it was a metaphor. if i really was that concerned i would have it removed. i know that this will pass, and i needed the encouragement of others on here that have been through what i have.

i'm sorry that you feel the way that you, and i appreciate your response, but sometimes, i feel like if you don't have something nice -ish to say to someone who is already down...then don't say it.

[new_me_2008 1]

I have to agree with Kacee. I hope that people who are very new in this and are still researching the band take the time to read all the way thru this thread to realize that you were just venting and that you have come out the other side on this one.

From the name of the post it looks as though the band is not working and/or it was a mistake. I have researched this for 2 years and finally took the plunge in October and it is the best thing I ever did. My only regret is that I waited so long. Had I read the title of the post and even your initial words, I may have let the $$$ and other things you mention get me to believe that this isnt the right solution (I am weak and can be easily be swayed by a crowd.)

I am glad that you have a place to vent and share your thoughts and feelings - hopefully next time you will be able to feel this coming on and stop it before it becomes such a huge upset.

I am ready for my probably well deserved flaming at this point....

[WASaBubbleButt 41]

I would like to address what you said about you sleeping on the couch and you and you dh "barely on good speaking terms". No matter how bad it gets, nothing will get better in my home if my dh and I are at odds. When this happens, I don’t care about anything. I don’t care if the house is cleaned, the bills are paid, if I exercise or what goes into my mouth. It will make me sick. You need to work on fixing this. Is there anyway you could have your folks or a friend take your son for a night so you and your dh can have some alone time to talk. When he comes home, meet him at the door, look him in the eyes and say "I love you". Tell him how important he is to you and let him know that nothing else matters but your relationship. Hopefully the conservation will start rolling from there. And no more sleeping on the couch, you belong in the same room as your husband. If you two can work on getting your relationship back where is should be, it would help elevate the "extreme stress" you are under, which in turn should help put everything else in perspective.

Best of luck and know that we are here for you.

Fantastic advice. Absolutely a great idea.

[bandster_1007 1]

i just wanted to say one more thing.

--i did research..and i also made sure that i can afford the band, and i can..but some other things have come up that make the finances stressful, and the band is a new big payment that i'm not reaping results from

i also wanted to say one more thing. i'm sorry that the thread title is misleading, but one should not assume anything until they read it all......and i think the band is glorified too much and people need to know what to expect. this emotional roller coaster has as much to do with the band as anything else. i was thrown into food rehab and i haven't fully recuperated so i'm having trouble dealing with other problems.

it's great that you guys had such a wonderful experience, but not all of us do. it's the fact. anyone researching should know that. i did research..i did know that, but knowing it and feeling it are two totally different things. when i did the research i hoped that i would never feel the things that people say they feel..well guess what..i am feeling them. and newbies (as i am) shoudl know the truth. this whole glorified, omg, never say anything bad about the band, is shit. this forum is for the good, the bad, and the ugly. excuse my cliche. right now, i'm in the ugly. hopefully one day i will be in the good, but i should have every right to post during whatever stage i am in..just as you have the right to respond.

i'm being honest..i can only hope everyone else will be. this is the worse thing i have ever been through and i think that people should know what to expect.

so if i am wrong for putting the truth out there.....then this whole thread is wrong.

[favorite 3]

<p>hang in there</p>