Need help with husbands post op eating

[ms.sss 15,725]

Often people (regardless of gender) who don’t ask for help won’t be open to unsolicited advice, however well-meaning it is provided.

Ongoing unsolicited advice, especially when all previous advice has already been ignored, can be construed as “nagging”. Which is unpleasant for everyone involved.

You have voiced your loving concern. He has chosen to do his own thing. If he was a child or some other type of dependent, one could make a case to further persist and/or intervene. But he is a grown man and can make decisions on his own.

Yes, he *may* have undesirable effects from his choices (but so far so good, though, I understand?). And his outcome, however good or bad will be his, and his alone.

Sometimes the best way learn something is to learn it yourself.

And this is not to say that he is destined to hurt himself. Maybe the lesson to be learned is that what he’s doing is fine for HIS body. And then again, maybe its not. Only he (and his body) can say.

That said, i agree that bacon and eggs at 2 weeks post op is not part of the food transition plan than even i was given. But he seemed to have tolerated it well and he would not be the first person i’ve heard/read who did not follow the plan and came out unscathed (health-wise, at least…)

Good Luck! ❤️

[Afrankrn 27]

It sounds like he needs therapy to both learn how to cope with the dietary changes and address communication around something that he is likely insecure about.

A good therapist can be difficult to find. It took me a couple of tries until I got one that I feel actually helps.

I would worry about what path he is on. It sounds like he may be on the "I can eat what I want because I got wls" instead of on the "I need to use my wls as a tool to develop better eating habits". As someone else said on a previous thread: you can out eat any diet or wls.

My therapist had me write a list of why I was doing this journey previous to my surgery. That way I can look back at that list during difficult times and refocus my goals. Maybe he can make a list for himself and use it as a reminder?

[MyDogsLoveMe 27]

Let his surgeon know and have the Dr. tell him how bad it is.

Scared but excited.

[Bettyboop56 33]

I think I would approach him that in your education on the set stages of eating that bacon would be week 7 or 8. That you are concerned about his health but would not be supportive when he gets dumping or complications.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,673]

How are things going? Has anything changed/improved?