Trying to get out of my head....

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,620]

So update: I found a therapist and had my first session with her. It was good, but I have to be completely honest with her, which is hard. I can find ways to justify my thoughts and behaviors, but not with her. I started using MyFitnessPal. I was told it would be helpful, but it just freaks me out more. I see 900 calories and panic and cut my food in half or substitute things so what I eat is lower in calories. I've been staying around 20-30ish carbs a day, 80ish grams of Proteins per day, and 20ish fats per day. I was told by my surgeon's office not to worry about counting calories at all, but here I am...counting them anyway. Now that I'm using that app, it's really messing with me more. I don't know what to do, but I really think I'm going to stop using that app. I think it's more for those who are needing help staying accountable and not eating too much or eating the wrong things, and not for those of us not eating at the levels we're supposed to because the idea of doing that freaks us out.

[loli_lotus 64]

3 hours ago, SleeveDiva2022 said:

So update: I found a therapist and had my first session with her. It was good, but I have to be completely honest with her, which is hard. I can find ways to justify my thoughts and behaviors, but not with her. I started using MyFitnessPal. I was told it would be helpful, but it just freaks me out more. I see 900 calories and panic and cut my food in half or substitute things so what I eat is lower in calories. I've been staying around 20-30ish carbs a day, 80ish grams of Proteins per day, and 20ish fats per day. I was told by my surgeon's office not to worry about counting calories at all, but here I am...counting them anyway. Now that I'm using that app, it's really messing with me more. I don't know what to do, but I really think I'm going to stop using that app. I think it's more for those who are needing help staying accountable and not eating too much or eating the wrong things, and not for those of us not eating at the levels we're supposed to because the idea of doing that freaks us out.

I'm glad you've found a therapist!! I agree, MyFitnessPal is the devil for those of us who find themselves stuck in the anxious restriction cycle!!! That's gonna be a hurdle for me too when I get to where you are

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,620]

1 hour ago, loli_lotus said:

I'm glad you've found a therapist!! I agree, MyFitnessPal is the devil for those of us who find themselves stuck in the anxious restriction cycle!!! That's gonna be a hurdle for me too when I get to where you are

Have you had your surgery yet? If so, which one? I see you've lost 55 pounds. That's awesome!!!!

[loli_lotus 64]

5 minutes ago, SleeveDiva2022 said:

Have you had your surgery yet? If so, which one? I see you've lost 55 pounds. That's awesome!!!!

No, I'm scheduled for sleeve in September, the 55lbs is total loss from my highest weight over the last 4 years with the last 10lbs being since my first meeting with the surgeon in April and trying to eat in a more "bariatric style" mindset, therapy, and more exercise.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,620]

57 minutes ago, loli_lotus said:

No, I'm scheduled for sleeve in September, the 55lbs is total loss from my highest weight over the last 4 years with the last 10lbs being since my first meeting with the surgeon in April and trying to eat in a more "bariatric style" mindset, therapy, and more exercise.

That's really smart. i didn't bother to do that and I should have. I went into my 2 week pre op diet and was completely shell-shocked at how hard it was. I definitely should have started early to get my mind and stomach ready lol

[DaisyAndSunshine 303]

I know exercise should be part of the routine but everytime I tried to incorporate more intense workout, I used to stall. So I kinda gave it a rest and relied mostly on my 45 mins of daily walk for exercise purposes.

So may be, go easy on the workout routine especially this early in the weight loss phase. Once you're more settled with a certain number you can always build your physique as long as your mindset is on point.

For me personally, stalls pressured into negative thinking of *what if this is it* and I won't lose anymore. Or that I'll lose slowly and then bam done losing at a weight I am uncomfortable with. This fear always hovered about and I didn't want to work against my sanity. So I decided to take lose with intense workouts. And focused mostly on eating and losing. I am at a happy place for now. And once I have reached about 120, my mindset will be so much better to form a good workout routine even if I had to up my calories.

Bottom line is, try easing your workout routine.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,620]

18 minutes ago, DaisyAndSunshine said:

I know exercise should be part of the routine but everytime I tried to incorporate more intense workout, I used to stall. So I kinda gave it a rest and relied mostly on my 45 mins of daily walk for exercise purposes.

So may be, go easy on the workout routine especially this early in the weight loss phase. Once you're more settled with a certain number you can always build your physique as long as your mindset is on point.

For me personally, stalls pressured into negative thinking of *what if this is it* and I won't lose anymore. Or that I'll lose slowly and then bam done losing at a weight I am uncomfortable with. This fear always hovered about and I didn't want to work against my sanity. So I decided to take lose with intense workouts. And focused mostly on eating and losing. I am at a happy place for now. And once I have reached about 120, my mindset will be so much better to form a good workout routine even if I had to up my calories.

Bottom line is, try easing your workout routine.

That's what I'm seeing, too. It seems like when I work out more, I stall. So I was trying to just stay with what I had, and I'm still stalled. So now I'm going to ease my work outs and just walk. Hopefully that will help.

[Mamasita2022 3]

It's so hard isn't it! I'm glad you found a therapist, because it is absolutely a control issue.

I would also suggest a different lunch. You could mix the hummus with greek yogurt for example, it would up the Protein and volume and actual work on the hunger part. Your daily intake definitely doesn't look like enough for 2 workouts a day! I've printed out lists of protein Snacks so that I can choose a higher protein=y option. If you will focus on anything, focus on your Water and protein numbers to start.

Another thought - are you taking anti-acids or ppis? If I don't take mine, I feel like I'm ravenous all day. I've read that the acidity causes our brain's response to make us feel like we are hungry.

Finally, my loss is exactly like yours. down a bit... waits a bit... down a bit... waits a bit. I feel like I only "lose" every 10 days or so. It's bizarre!

oh, and finally for sure On FB there's a group called Bariatric Beast. It's tough love but I've found the most direct and straightforward support there. No waffling hehehehe. Might be worth a look.

Girl - YOU GOT THIS!

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,620]

8 hours ago, Mamasita2022 said:

It's so hard isn't it! I'm glad you found a therapist, because it is absolutely a control issue.

I would also suggest a different lunch. You could mix the hummus with greek yogurt for example, it would up the Protein and volume and actual work on the hunger part. Your daily intake definitely doesn't look like enough for 2 workouts a day! I've printed out lists of Protein Snacks so that I can choose a higher protein=y option. If you will focus on anything, focus on your Water and protein numbers to start.

Another thought - are you taking anti-acids or ppis? If I don't take mine, I feel like I'm ravenous all day. I've read that the acidity causes our brain's response to make us feel like we are hungry.

Finally, my loss is exactly like yours. down a bit... waits a bit... down a bit... waits a bit. I feel like I only "lose" every 10 days or so. It's bizarre!

oh, and finally for sure On FB there's a group called Bariatric Beast. It's tough love but I've found the most direct and straightforward support there. No waffling hehehehe. Might be worth a look.

Girl - YOU GOT THIS!

I'm on Omeprazole daily. And as of today I actually gained 4 pounds!!! Like, how?? Why??? It's so demoralizing because I didn't have these issues when I did Keto. I steadily lost, I didn't have a fear of eating, I only had 1 short stall. My issue was that I couldn't keep it off once I lost 100 pounds (in 9 months). I'm finding it's 10x harder to lose weight after this surgery than it was with just doing keto. Only now I can't do keto again because I had the surgery and I have to have low fat instead of high fat (both require low carbs, low sugar, and high protein). I thought maybe if I did keto again, then it would be easier to lose and the surgery would help me keep it off. But then I read that you can't do keto once you have the surgery. So I ended up afraid to eat because it seems like everything causes weight gain....and now here we are. *sigh*

[Splenda 257]

On 7/18/2022 at 3:12 PM, SleeveDiva2022 said:

I'm on Omeprazole daily. And as of today I actually gained 4 pounds!!! Like, how?? Why??? It's so demoralizing because I didn't have these issues when I did Keto. I steadily lost, I didn't have a fear of eating, I only had 1 short stall. My issue was that I couldn't keep it off once I lost 100 pounds (in 9 months). I'm finding it's 10x harder to lose weight after this surgery than it was with just doing Keto. Only now I can't do keto again because I had the surgery and I have to have low fat instead of high fat (both require low carbs, low sugar, and high protein). I thought maybe if I did keto again, then it would be easier to lose and the surgery would help me keep it off. But then I read that you can't do keto once you have the surgery. So I ended up afraid to eat because it seems like everything causes weight gain....and now here we are. *sigh*

Here is my considered reaction to the people who say, "You can't do keto once you have the surgery"

"Says who?"

I am a firm believer that in the days and weeks after the surgery, you need to listen to your surgeon and be conservative with what foods you try -- you don't want to cause any complications. But the further you get from surgery, the more you have to find a healthy routine that works for you.

Now, post-surgery keto probably wouldn't look exactly like pre-surgery keto. The fats you can tolerate will be different. Your Protein goals would be more important than your macros. It would be a process of trial and error. It may turn into a dirty/lazy keto diet (that's what my wife does. She eats whatever she wants as long as her net carbs stay below 20 per day). Your current way of eating like a bird and working out like an athlete isn't doing you any good. You are stuck in stalls because your metabolism is trying to account for not getting enough calories while you are burning like crazy.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,620]

3 hours ago, Splenda said:

Here is my considered reaction to the people who say, "You can't do Keto once you have the surgery"

"Says who?"

I am a firm believer that in the days and weeks after the surgery, you need to listen to your surgeon and be conservative with what foods you try -- you don't want to cause any complications. But the further you get from surgery, the more you have to find a healthy routine that works for you.

Now, post-surgery keto probably wouldn't look exactly like pre-surgery keto. The fats you can tolerate will be different. Your Protein goals would be more important than your macros. It would be a process of trial and error. It may turn into a dirty/lazy keto diet (that's what my wife does. She eats whatever she wants as long as her net carbs stay below 20 per day). Your current way of eating like a bird and working out like an athlete isn't doing you any good. You are stuck in stalls because your metabolism is trying to account for not getting enough calories while you are burning like crazy.

I asked my dietician in the group zoom 3 month check in yesterday and she said "because we don't do that. It's not recommended after surgery" so I asked her "ok, but why? Will it make me sick? Will it hurt me? I know the bariatric diet says low fat but my body responds better to high fats, very low carbs, low sugar, and high Protein. Is the fat going to hurt me? I don't do all eggs and bacon and all that, and my cholesterol is always perfect. What is bad about it?" and I still got the same response of "because it's not recommended for after surgery". So I never actually got a real answer for why keto isn't allowed after surgery.

[Splenda 257]

3 hours ago, SleeveDiva2022 said:

I asked my dietician in the group zoom 3 month check in yesterday and she said "because we don't do that. It's not recommended after surgery" so I asked her "ok, but why? Will it make me sick? Will it hurt me? I know the bariatric diet says low fat but my body responds better to high fats, very low carbs, low sugar, and high Protein. Is the fat going to hurt me? I don't do all eggs and bacon and all that, and my cholesterol is always perfect. What is bad about it?" and I still got the same response of "because it's not recommended for after surgery". So I never actually got a real answer for why Keto isn't allowed after surgery.

You asked precisely the right question and they didn't have an answer for you. The nutritionist is not your mother -- "because I said so" doesn't work as an answer.

Try keto, see what happens, adjust your diet based on how your body responds. I am 11 months out -- at a certain point, it becomes less about what the nutritionist says and more about you finding a healthy way to live your life.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,620]

2 hours ago, Splenda said:

You asked precisely the right question and they didn't have an answer for you. The nutritionist is not your mother -- "because I said so" doesn't work as an answer.

Try Keto, see what happens, adjust your diet based on how your body responds. I am 11 months out -- at a certain point, it becomes less about what the nutritionist says and more about you finding a healthy way to live your life.

You're right. I've been trying so hard to follow their directions to the letter that I haven't been listening to my body. I know I can't go crazy with the fats, but more than 50 per day is needed for keto. I used to hit around 100-120g of fats per day, so if I look at maybe 75g of fats per day, while still keeping my carbs very low (the bariatric diet is 50 or less carbs per day, when I did keto I stayed under 35 per day) I'll see if it works well or needs to be adjusted again. And I always stayed around 80 or so grams of Protein per day. And I went on sugar free and very low sugar when I did keto to begin with and just always kept it. The fats are really the biggest difference. So we'll see how it goes. Worse comes to worst, I can just go back on the bariatric diet and do a "pouch reset" and start again.

[Splenda 257]

11 hours ago, SleeveDiva2022 said:

You're right. I've been trying so hard to follow their directions to the letter that I haven't been listening to my body. I know I can't go crazy with the fats, but more than 50 per day is needed for Keto. I used to hit around 100-120g of fats per day, so if I look at maybe 75g of fats per day, while still keeping my carbs very low (the bariatric diet is 50 or less carbs per day, when I did keto I stayed under 35 per day) I'll see if it works well or needs to be adjusted again. And I always stayed around 80 or so grams of Protein per day. And I went on sugar free and very low sugar when I did keto to begin with and just always kept it. The fats are really the biggest difference. So we'll see how it goes. Worse comes to worst, I can just go back on the bariatric diet and do a "pouch reset" and start again.

One tip, if you haven't tried them already, is to incorporate Keto Chow shakes. They have a ton of flavors, 26g Protein per shake and a ton of vitamins/minerals. They are designed to have you add the fat of your choosing to them (heavy whipping cream, butter, MCT, whatever) so that you can hit your macros. Congrats on taking charge of your nutrition!

[ms.sss 15,601]

On 7/15/2022 at 9:17 PM, SleeveDiva2022 said:

Now that I'm using that app, it's really messing with me more. I don't know what to do, but I really think I'm going to stop using that app. I think it's more for those who are needing help staying accountable and not eating too much or eating the wrong things, and not for those of us not eating at the levels we're supposed to because the idea of doing that freaks us out.

While tracking certainly helps and appeals to those of this mindset, there is another side-benefit to tracking: data collection and discovery of trends.

I am one of those regular food trackers and daily body weighers and all-around spreadsheet lover (almost 4 years now and still going). By looking over the historical data i can easily figure out what foods/days/activities (or lack thereof) /macro combinations/eating schedules/etc work for or against whatever state i am looking to be in.

You can see on your screen that these many calories don’t make a diff to your weight loss rate, or that those many carbs leads to stalls or swooshes. Or that these amounts of sugar make you eat less the next day. So much info! Lol

I realize this may seem like a lot of effort to some, but (1) i like doing it, and (2) honestly takes less of my actual time than i spend on this forum, lol.

I get that seeing black and white numbers may scare you cuz u are “getting to close” for comfort to your already accepted max goals, but maybe its better to be aware of facts than to live in angst of the unknown?

Kinda like when we (or at least *i*) would not get on the scale in my pre-op days cuz I didn’t want to freak out over the number i would inevitably see. Then next thing u know, oopsies i gained 25 lbs.

But yes, i get it, easier said than done. Hopefully your continued work with your new therapist will help you trust yourself and your abilities to peacefully face whatever comes your way, regardless if they meet your expectations or not.

Goof Luck! ❤️

Edited July 21, 2022 by ms.sss