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Spouse Obsessed with Food



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59 minutes ago, lizonaplane said:

I think you can't expect everyone in your life to change everything in THEIR lives because you are having surgery. He was trying to give you a day off from cooking, but it felt more stressful to you. If you're going to start resenting his way of handling food, you're going to have a hard time moving forward, especially if you know he doesn't appreciate your responses (snarky comments - no one likes those!).

FWIW, I eat out like 90% of my meals because I travel for work most of the week and sometimes for 2 weeks in a row. You can eat out, you just have to think about what you're going to eat. I eat fish and veggies, or chili, or pulled pork, or a burger minus the bun. Or basically anything I want - even pizza if nothing else is available. I just don't eat very much of it and I try to limit the carbs (pizza is very rare, but sometimes it's what everyone else is having and I don't like being left out or being a party pooper).

Don't worry about every single meal being perfect - that's a way to set yourself for failure. Just aim to eat well 80-90% of the time, and you'll do great!

Perfectly said!

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3 hours ago, lizonaplane said:

I think you can't expect everyone in your life to change everything in THEIR lives because you are having surgery. He was trying to give you a day off from cooking, but it felt more stressful to you. If you're going to start resenting his way of handling food, you're going to have a hard time moving forward, especially if you know he doesn't appreciate your responses (snarky comments - no one likes those!).

I don't expect EVERYONE to change their lives. I don't think it's too much to expect my spouse who supports my decision to have surgery to accept when I say "No, I don't want to go out." He argued with me after I said no to the point that I relented and went.

I don't resent how he eats; his body his choice...I do want my choices respected and don't want to be put in the situations where every part of our lives revolve around food either.

As far as my snarky comments, it is just who I am. I understand that I'm not everyone's cup of tea and that's okay. We've been married for 16 years and we communicate just fine snark and all.

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