This surgery is bullshit...

[Tony B - NJ 642]

On 12/13/2021 at 4:55 PM, Blueslily said:

Sorry, I cant imagine getting any type of surgery done without knowing what I would need to do afterwards. I used to read these boards a lot when preparing, but post surgery and at goal now, its disheartening to read some posts on here so I'm here a lot less. People not doing what they were advised to do but rant and rave anger here. Seems so silly. Surgery is a tool. That's it. I knew that going in and I knew it during. And, if the surgery team is not giving you enough info, sorry, but there are tons of places online to get it. I never research just using one source. Nor, did I just meet with one surgeon. I get it that some folks have challenges after surgery. No problem. Our bodies are different and react different. But, if someone is not willing to make lifestyle changes, this is not the surgery for them. I'm off to take a break from this site again. Stuff like this is annoying. I dont take it personal, but it just feeds into the negativity out there about having WLS. All the best everyone!

I agree 100% with that. To be honest, I think there is more at play though. I think the people ranting and being negative are either those who were simply not able to follow directions and control their urges or someone who just flat out did not have the surgery or even knows a spouse who wants to and are trying to create negative content to change their minds. There are a lot of people who have partners or spouses that are dead set against the surgery.

[Tony B - NJ 642]

On 12/18/2021 at 10:14 AM, goodmanje said:

Well I’ve been logging my meals since I originally posted this and following the doctors advice to the T and I still haven't lost a single pound. Every visit he acts like he doesn’t believe me when I say I’m staying at 800 calories a day. So I’ve been told a million times by my doctor and people on this forum that the surgery is just a tool. I get that. But a tool for what? How do you use the tool? I don’t ever feel full, I’m always hungry, I’m not losing weight…. What a useless tool.

I tend to agree with your Doctor. It is scientifically impossible to consume 800 calories per day and not lose weight, especially if you are walking and/or exercising as recommended. It could be that you are not accurately recording your calories, not counting things like butter, oil, Snacks, calories from sugary drinks etc, etc. Read about it...it is just not possible.

[Tony B - NJ 642]

On 12/11/2021 at 2:18 PM, SleeverSk said:

Exactly, which is why the op and many others feel like this. My observations and experience on this journey has lead me to believe to succeed long term with this surgery you need to be the type of person who would succeed with normal diet and exercise programs and if you can do that why would you need surgery. Surgery is a kick start caused by the early after surgery effects where you physically cant eat and your body is forced to survive on a low calorie diet. But once the body heals and you can start bringing in "normal" foods that is where you need will power and commitment and this is where it fails as some of us are lead to believe that the Portion Control side of things is what looses the weight. I have been very surprised by the amount and types of foods i can actually eat ! I feel that perhaps the op may experience the same. Its not the fault of the op for being disappointed and to have feelings of being misinformed. My dietian told me prior to surgery and again after surgery that I could eat as I did pre surgery and loose weight because of the Portion Control side of things.... false. My surgeon told me AFTER surgery at my 3 month post op appointment that the effects of the sleeve last 18 months to 2 years at the most and what happens after that is entirely up to you. So yes if you look at it like that why are we cutting pieces off a perfectly healthy vital organ for short term benefit. Studies now show that gut health plays a huge roll in weight control among other modern health issues so maybe that is another solution that should be looked at before surgery as I dont even know if we are able to do what it takes to get out gut health right after surgery. That is something i plan to look into.

I don't agree with your correlation between those who are successful with the tool could lose weight without the tool. I do not agree at all. The restriction is HUGE for me. When I feel the restriction I stop eating. I am getting better at stopping before restriction, but without that restriction, I do not think I would have been successful in the first 3 months after surgery. The restriction also prevents you from deciding....well it is "name a holiday or special day" and I am going to cheat this one time. You simply cannot without a lot of pain and getting sick. Once you start cheating for special occasions, you will find more occasions and you will gain weight. the sleeve restriction prevents those slip ups from happening.

[BayougirlMrsS 3,934]

On 12/12/2021 at 2:53 PM, SleeverSk said:

But whats the point if you are miserable 🙁and for some its given them reflux Personally I am physically hungry all the time I cant seem to get that feeling of satisfaction. Plus the reflux

what is your process? If you had to write a step for step, what would it look like?
Exp: 1. remove one egg from fridge. 2. put one tsp of oil/butter in pan. 3. scramble egg with pepper. 4 pour egg into pan...... you get the point. There has to be some disconnect going on. I know mine was not portioning/weighing my food... I was "eye-balling" it. Well, my visual is not accurate at all. What looks "normal" to me is not, its much more. When I took the time to really weigh what I was eating I was so shocked. Also, I have to wait 30 min after my last bite. As soon as i drink..... I'm hungry again. I have a set plan for the day and even if i am hungry, i stick to it.....
Breakfast at 830-9
snack at 1030-11
lunch 12-1
snack at 3-330
dinner 6-630............that's it end of the day and no more food, no matter what. I have purged my home/car/office of all items that are "junk". I'm a person that if i know it's there, I NEED IT!!! So, if it's not there i can't. Can't eat what you don't buy.

[BayougirlMrsS 3,934]

On 12/18/2021 at 10:40 AM, Jaelzion said:

Now that you are logging your intake, can you post a sample of what you eat in a day? Between all of the folks here, there are decades of experience with post-bariatric weight loss. Maybe someone will be able to spot something that could be derailing your progress.

100% agree.

[huskymama 149]

I have a spouse who doesn’t want me to have the surgery. I’m having the sleeve tomorrow and today I am 5’7 and 211. I am a severe diabetic and to the point I have to have this even though I’m at a 34 BMI due to the diabetes and health issues with that my insurance is paying 100% of the surgery. But Mr has brought me my favorite things, tried to take me to dinner and get mad when I say no during the liquid phase. The closer to surgery the more insecure he is becoming (married 20 years) I am seeing my therapist more the past week then my entire life. I will choose life and health over his insecurities and sabotaging me. I lost my very healthy thin father to diabetes when I was 17. I want to be here for my kids and grandkids. If you want this, you want life and choose, as someone here told me yesterday, to learn to love yourself then this will work and you will be successful. My sister had bypass 25 years ago and still maintaining her weight loss, her daughter had it 3 years ago maintaining her weight loss. I could go on and on but I won’t. I think the first step is seeing a therapist to find out why you are killing yourself with food. Because that is what is happening. It’s a tool, it’s up to you to succeed. And I am fighting against all odds with my Hubby but I will choose life and make this successful if that means leaving my 20 year marriage. If he loves me he will support me and help me - period

[Robert S. Libberton 22]

Delay the survey fix the marriage or not prior to another life change, it takes 2 to tango and your own part is ignored in your post.

[Guest]

16 minutes ago, Robert S. Libberton said:

Delay the survey fix the marriage or not prior to another life change, it takes 2 to tango and your own part is ignored in your post.

No. Sorry, but super no. Medical intervention to save one's life isn't a two-to-tango situation.

[Jaelzion 1,127]

2 hours ago, Robert S. Libberton said:

Delay the survey fix the marriage or not prior to another life change, it takes 2 to tango and your own part is ignored in your post.

I respectfully disagree. Severe diabetes is an imminent threat to your life. You can work on your marriage without delaying surgery. Many here have done so and eventually got to a better place with regard to both health AND their marital relationship.

[Jaelzion 1,127]

4 hours ago, Tony B - NJ said:

To be honest, I think there is more at play though. I think the people ranting and being negative are either those who were simply not able to follow directions and control their urges or someone who just flat out did not have the surgery or even knows a spouse who wants to and are trying to create negative content to change their minds.

This has crossed my mind as well. There's no way to be sure, so I decided to answer the questions as if they are being sincerely asked; however, I do notice that this individual is not willing to invest any time or effort in getting help (for instance, by posting intake for a sample day). People who really want help getting on track are generally willing to engage with others and provide the info we would need to help troubleshoot.

[huskymama 149]

Thank you for the two of you for your support