Complex trauma/ developmental trauma

[Gen71 2]

I'm scheduled for surgery December 16th and I'm having second thoughts. I had a traumatic childhood (I am in weekly therapy) so control over food is important to me. I'm not a binger not do I necessarily eat too much, I gain weight because of what I eat. Will I be able to eat any foods I like after I'm through the post-op liquid/puree stages? I can't handle eating only low fat Protein and veggies now and that seems to be what others are eating on chat groups. Should I not have the surgery or have others with emotional eating issues been ok? I really appreciate hearing from anyone willing to answer, especially those with psychological food reliance issues. Also, I'm told no caffeine, ever again. Is that what you guys follow?

[Postop 409]

One of the beauties of the TDS is you can eat anything. Just not as much. And if you eat things like too much sugar or simple carbs, you’ll most likely have foul smelling gas and/or stool.

Of course, you can have caffeine.

You’re also able to take NSAIDs & all other medications - which was important to me, in case I ever needed them.

TDS 2005.

Edited November 11, 2021 by Postop

[Jaelzion 1,125]

@Gen71, you have more than a month until your surgery date, so you have time to explore this a bit. If I were you, I'd go to your bariatric program and explain your concerns and how you are feeling. Maybe they can set you up with a psych session just to make sure it's a good idea to go forward with the surgery. I know you said you are in therapy, but not every therapist understands bariatric surgery and how it affects people. It sounds like you are asking whether you will still be able to use food as a coping mechanism and to me that indicates you might not be ready for such a radical change. We've seen an uptick in the number of people who say they regret the surgery and some of them have complained about not realizing what a huge change it was going to be. Best wishes, whatever you decide.

[Gen71 2]

Thank you both. I am glad to hear that the type of food is not a huge limitation.

As for not being ready and asking my surgical group for support... I agree I may not be ready but asking for support isn't an option. The program I'm in which is government funded and paid for, does not offer any psychological support and it was extremely difficult to get them to approve me. I was struggling and being honest but they felt I wasn't making progress fast enough and were on the verge of kicking me out so asking for support will just get my surgery cancelled. I felt punished and threatened not supported, which frankly is the worst thing for a trauma survivor. That's why I'm trying to explore on my own if I'm ready and what the pros, cons and risks are.

[amberstevens87 0]

I am scheduled for the same surgery and same date as you! I’ve had the same concerns. What’s helped me is searching out other people on social media (IG, TikTok, etc). So many people are here to help and don’t mind answering questions!

[Guest]

Hello! I have some of the same concerns as you. I've felt it helpful to regard this surgery as a tool to pivot away from using certain types of food as an emotional crutch. Will I be able to take a big bite of a donut after surgery? Yes. However due to unpleasant side effects I may no longer want to. This is one of the attractions of this type of surgery for me.

[Guest]

On 11/12/2021 at 9:02 AM, Gen71 said:

I felt punished and threatened not supported, which frankly is the worst thing for a trauma survivor

Unfortunately, this is the way a lot of medical systems deal with obese people, and it's heavily internalized in the obese themselves. Just browse around these pages for a bit.

Based on what we know about the causes for a high weight set point, childhood trauma is always #1 on the list. It's not very surprising a stressed body does what it can to survive, including driving you to stock up for worse times. Unfortunately, we don't lack access to calories at almost any stage in our lives, so this mechanism will lead to obesity.

You probably never had a chance. This surgery could be that one chance to correct something that is not your fault in the least bit.

Then why are you being met with this kind of punishing attitude? Ignorance. Really, that's it. There's still a lot of people who see obesity as some sort of moral defect. Those people should pipe down real fast, trust me the future won't be kind to them (think blackface).

Take pity in them, step back and look at getting to the surgery as merely a way to further your healing. That's a healing that cannot come from surgery, as you know. It'll come from therapy while you get another chance at a body that isn't clinging on to every calorie for dear life.

Oh, and beware: for every malabsorptive surgery patient here, there's 15 sleevers who think we all have the same surgery.