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having second thoughts



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I am scheduled Feb 7th to have lap band. My son is not real happy with my decision and I am not 100% confident my husband is ok with this. Now i am wondering if I should cancel my appt. Any advice?

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I haven't had mine yet so I can't really advise you....but think about it and weigh the good and bad. I think the good will win you over.

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Why would you cancel something you are doing for yourself and your health for your husband or son? If you needed a kidney transplant and your son said no, would you not do it? I know that sounds more dramatic, but what you need to do is find out exactly WHAT kind of reservation he has about this whole thing? How old is your son? You need to have everyone in your family IMFORMED and EDUCATED so they don't go off half-cocked with wild notions about what is going on with you. Forwarned is forarmed. What exactly has your son and husband said?

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We all go through this. Here is my post when I got my surgery date:

Seriously Thinking About Backing Out I am totally freaking out... I have been thinking about this for two years. When I finally decided to do it, after much reading and research, my insurance changes and I am able to get approved in less then a month. I am scheduled to have surgery 11/09 and have the time to take off from work (although I really need to be there because things are crazy).

I guess I did not expect things to go so easily, and I should feel ashamed of myself when there are so many self-pays or people with difficult insurances who are absolutely sure this is the right thing for them. I feel that I have not had enough time to say good-bye to food. I know it really isn't a true good bye, but it could be if my body does not acclimate to the band like some others on this forum. I actually think I could live without cake the rest of my life, but the thought of never eating asparagus or broccoli or steak again, I am not sure if I can live with that.

What in the hell am I doing? Am I undermining my long term health if I back out? The idea of the surgery is freaking me out, the idea of not eating a normal diet for 6 weeks freaks me out. And ironically it sounds like when the band does not work, it makes eating those foods that got me here so much easier than eating the truly healthy foods that I like but eat to much of…Lord help me figure this thing out...

Now- I am 4 weeks post op. It is and had been hard, and we will always be battling this curse of weight, but now I have some backup in helping me manage it better.

You have to make the decision for yourself, not for your son and not for your husband, but for you. Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

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Here's what I tell ANYONE who has doubts: go to an informational seminar--if you have already, go again but this time take your husband and son with you.

Ask questions--any question you can conceive--of the professionals there, and weigh all your options. Only then can you make an educated informed decision.

And read, read, read--everything you can find on the surgery--good AND bad.

Without the surgery (and I don't even know your BMI, history, etc) your quality of life is going to go severely downhill in the future. Yes, you can try to diet and exercise but if you are like the rest of us, you will fail time and time again--it's just built into our fat cells!

The very best to you and the decision you must make...

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I have my surgery Dec. 17th. They actully moved it up and I have been having those thoughts. Should I do it? I know more than anything I want this. I think it's the addict in me.... im not an addict to drugs or alcohol, I am however and addict to food. I cannot live like this, I carry my weight well and people wonder why I am doing this I couldn't possibly weigh enough. But little do they know I am 320 lbs. I sit here and think hmm no more soda, no more candy which is fine, but the meat and potatoes and gravy dear lord help me! I know however this is the right thing. I think it's the anticipation that is getting to me. I have even went as far as saying... hmm do I really want to drive 4 hours just to get my band filled. When you live in Wyoming.. things are few and far between. Just another excuse. I am on the countdown now... and I need to be around for my children as they grow! I know how you are feeling though.

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I am scheduled Feb 7th to have lap band. My son is not real happy with my decision and I am not 100% confident my husband is ok with this. Now i am wondering if I should cancel my appt. Any advice?

Hi Cindy,

My surgery is 4 days after yours. I've had 2nd, 3rd and even 4th thoughts-lol. But now all i feel is excitement. i know it will be hard at times but i'm sure in the end it will be worth it. We can do it!

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Hi Cindy,

My surgery is 4 days after yours. I've had 2nd, 3rd and even 4th thoughts-lol. But now all i feel is excitement. i know it will be hard at times but i'm sure in the end it will be worth it. We can do it!

still trying to get this ticker thing right:faint:

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I am scheduled Feb 7th to have lap band. My son is not real happy with my decision and I am not 100% confident my husband is ok with this. Now i am wondering if I should cancel my appt. Any advice?

I agree with make 33, take your husband and son to an informational seminar with you. My husband wasn't keen on me having lap-band surgery, but he went with me to the informational seminar and then he supported me 100%. A lot of people hear "weight loss surgery" and think it's all drastic like the bypass. The seminar will help answer their questions and calm their fears.

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I am scheduled Feb 7th to have lap band. My son is not real happy with my decision and I am not 100% confident my husband is ok with this. Now i am wondering if I should cancel my appt. Any advice?

Cindy - this is totally up to you - how old are you, how long have you been overweight, do you have any co-morbities, how much overweight are you - why did you want the lapband in the first place.

I'm 52 - 5'4 starting weight 250 - weight today 4 months after banding 196 (results not typical but I am working really hard - i eat healthy 98% of the time & exercise 5 days a week) - I have ton of more energy - I feel so much better - I am off one of my blood pressure meds (was on 2) I am in a size 14 - was 22/24 tops and 18 bottoms - I can now buy clothes in the womens dept

The choice is yours - the reasons are yours - Good Luck ...

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I am so...... glad i did it. I can only speak for myself, but it has given me back my life. Best thing i ever did that was just for me. Well this and college, both for me, both smart decisions for me. Donna

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Thank you all for you advice. I do appreciate very much. I plan on sitting my son down so we can talk about the procedure. I have struggled all my life with weight. Thanks again all. I will take advice.

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