Surgery Scheduled and Telling No One

[Highly_Undermedicated 55]

I am 14 months post RNY. I told my Mom (but she had Alzheimer's and was not aware), Dad, Sister, Partner and kids prior to surgery. Of course my sister and Dad tried to convince me not to go through with it stating they heard this or knew of someone that...etc. I did not listen. My partner of nearly 24 years was very supportive and totally on board as too were my kids. Of course my sister told anyone and everyone else...family that I have no contact with or have not seen in a decade or longer until my Mom passed away 6 months ago. So I could've cated less. My partner told a couple of our close neighbors and one of his friends. And then of course afterwards the girls at the pharmacy started taking notice when the weight was dropping and I was no longer needing meds...so we told them. I was a bit embarrassed at first but now I feel silly for even feeling that way. I tell anyone and everyone that asks me how I lost weight. I have nothing to hide. It wasn't an easy task either. I lost 10 lbs a month or less sometimes, had a few complications, some support, some not, exercise like crazy and have to be OCD about my intake and tracking. It's a lot of work. More so than just a diet or exercise routine. It's a lifetime commitment and you have to put in the hard work to get out of it what you want. If you miss junk food, sweets, chips..find better alternatives, make better choices or choose to take steps backwards out of your progression. But whatever you do, you do it for you and only you. And there's nothing to feel guilty or ashamed, embarrassed about. And it's definitely not taking the easy way out. Because there's nothing easy about the road we are all choosing to travel down. Some just reach their destination a lot quicker than others while some enjoy the journey a little bit longer. So tell whomever you want or don't want to. But eventually the secrets gonna be revealed in around 6 months post op. Up to you what you want to share..your life, your body.

[Kikikayaker 11]

What you wrote is exactly how I feel! I’m 6 months post. I shared my news with my family and just a few close friends. My transformation has been huge and for people not to notice would be an extraordinary thing. I am 5’6 with medical complexities. I started out at 240 pounds. I am now 145 pounds. It is a huge difference.I Work Out, kayak twice a week and go to the gym for Zumba and yoga... I watch what I eat non stop...it is not an easy fix… And anyone who thinks that this is a one trick pony is far from understanding the challenges that you will face… The gastric bypass surgery is not easy, and it wasn’t easy for me to make the decision as it is not easy for anyone to make such a life altering choice. I know it is hard for anyone to face something like this, I am 48 years old had a life long ordeal of being teased about my weight by my family, the people that are supposed to love you… And I still am facing it with my father who feels that I should still only weigh 115 pounds… It will never stop. But I am happy, i was the only heavy one out of 4 kids. But now, I am healthy, I am no longer taking insulin, and I am finally excepting who I am. I hope that anyone who is facing this decision to have surgery understands that this is their life ....their decision...and no matter what they do they need to love themselves.

[Kikikayaker 11]

[TSH1222 20]

1 minute ago, Kikikayaker said:

What you wrote is exactly how I feel! I’m 6 months post. I shared my news with my family and just a few close friends. My transformation has been huge and for people not to notice would be an extraordinary thing. I am 5’6 with medical complexities. I started out at 240 pounds. I am now 145 pounds. It is a huge difference.I Work Out, kayak twice a week and go to the gym for Zumba and yoga... I watch what I eat non stop...it is not an easy fix… And anyone who thinks that this is a one trick pony is far from understanding the challenges that you will face… The gastric bypass surgery is not easy, and it wasn’t easy for me to make the decision as it is not easy for anyone to make such a life altering choice. I know it is hard for anyone to face something like this, I am 48 years old had a life long ordeal of being teased about my weight by my family, the people that are supposed to love you… And I still am facing it with my father who feels that I should still only weigh 115 pounds… It will never stop. But I am happy, i was the only heavy one out of 4 kids. But now, I am healthy, I am no longer taking insulin, and I am finally excepting who I am. I hope that anyone who is facing this decision to have surgery understands that this is their life ....their decision...and no matter what they do they need to love themselves.

1 minute ago, Kikikayaker said:

What you wrote is exactly how I feel! I’m 6 months post. I shared my news with my family and just a few close friends. My transformation has been huge and for people not to notice would be an extraordinary thing. I am 5’6 with medical complexities. I started out at 240 pounds. I am now 145 pounds. It is a huge difference.I Work Out, kayak twice a week and go to the gym for Zumba and yoga... I watch what I eat non stop...it is not an easy fix… And anyone who thinks that this is a one trick pony is far from understanding the challenges that you will face… The gastric bypass surgery is not easy, and it wasn’t easy for me to make the decision as it is not easy for anyone to make such a life altering choice. I know it is hard for anyone to face something like this, I am 48 years old had a life long ordeal of being teased about my weight by my family, the people that are supposed to love you… And I still am facing it with my father who feels that I should still only weigh 115 pounds… It will never stop. But I am happy, i was the only heavy one out of 4 kids. But now, I am healthy, I am no longer taking insulin, and I am finally excepting who I am. I hope that anyone who is facing this decision to have surgery understands that this is their life ....their decision...and no matter what they do they need to love themselves.

God Bless, nothing easy about the road ahead. A kind face, keep going.

[jettyC 4]

I'm new here and have just started this journey. I do not have surgery scheduled yet because I have to jump through the insurance hoops. I am hoping to learn how to eat too before surgery.

Anyway, I am apprehensive about telling anyone. I mentioned WLS to my bestie this morning. She told me I don't need it.

I told my sister my plan and while she seems supportive, she also makes snide remarks like, "I hope you're ready to live with a colostomy bag when the surgery goes wrong."

When I required surgery for my shoulder 2 years ago no one told me I didn't need it. I hadn't even been suffering that long with that condition.

I don't want to close people out of my life but I may have to so they don't sabotage my decisions.

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