Home from 12/3 surgery

[Carolk1 0]

I arrived at the hospital at 5:45 am, did all the pre-op (went very smoothly). I met with the nurses and the anesthegiologist and the surgeon. My surgeon's last words, "this shouldn't be a problem I've done 2000, see you when you wake up". They rolled me into the surgery room, strapped me in and said goodnight....

The next thing I know I'm being rolled out of the OR and see my husband talking to the doctor, gave them a small wave and was looking forward to my life as a bandster.

I get settled in my spot in post-op and I over hear the nurse whispering while she's looking at my chart, saying ohhhhhhhhhhh.

The surgeon walks over at this point, while I'm totally out of it and says, "I'm sorry we were unable to place the band". My first thought was, is this a dream? Second thought, a sigh of relief, third thought - What the F????

He tells me that he couldn't get through a wall of scar tissue that was there from a gallbladder surgery I had in 1988. Apparently the scar tissue was so great that there was no way around it.

Now the fun begins...what do I think? what do I feel? all this prep, all the emotion. The surgeon mentions I could have a sleeve done and we can discuss at my post op appt. (not dying to go back to surgery also bad timing to bring this up).

Nurses then came over to me one by one and at least 3 of them said, oh that's too bad, I guess you'll have to do it the old fashioned way...at that moment I was completely defensive and could not believe what I just heard. It came across to me as they were a bit superior and I'm this diet/exercise failure. Which I'm not - I"m very successful at losing, just can't seem to keep it off.

So, now I'm home, experiencing all the pain, soreness and gas that I have prepared to deal with for months, but no band....I'm confused, lost, relieved, excited, sad, just a whole mix of emotion. I hope and I pray that I can turn this whole ordeal into a positive motivational factor to continue on my journey of creating a healthier life. And doing it, "The Old Fashiponed Way".

[100lbsforsale 0]

Carolk1,

OH man I am so sorry. It completely sucks! I am in a similiar boat. The old fashioned way. I just want to say "oh, yeah, Old Fashion THIS!" *Sigh*. Here's to a speedy recovery for you. (((Hugs))).

[Sunshine_TX 0]

I'm sorry to hear about your lap-band procedure. All that comes to mind is everythihng happens for a reason! You can turn this around even if you have to do it without a band. Best of luck to you!

[Carolk1 0]

Thanks 100 - I just feel a little foggy about everything and really want to make sure I continue my diet journey. Quite honestly, while I was in the hospital I started thinking about wow how I would love to eat some food that I haven't been able to eat in awhile and had planned not to eat for a long time...That scared me and still does...Obviously I am a food addict, no way getting around it..no hiding it....Now I think I really need to focus on building exercise into my life and breaking the addiction, just not sure where and/or how to break that addiction. I suppose it's a slow process. OA is not for me, went to a meeting and it was a little to cumbaya if you know what I mean...all holding hands and praying at the end...

[Carolk1 0]

I'm sorry to hear about your lap-band procedure. All that comes to mind is everythihng happens for a reason! You can turn this around even if you have to do it without a band. Best of luck to you!

YES definitely something that came to my mind as well... I suppose that's why the high and low of the mixed emotions.....

[Sunshine_TX 0]

I would focus on the jump start you got from pre-op/post-op you can do it!!!!!!!! I understand addiction I cried this morning when I got approved with all types of mixed emotions one of which is the thought of not getting to eat what I want when I want....

[NewMeFrisco 0]

Oh, I would have been so mad. But things happen for a reason, maybe God has something better for you waiting.

Good Luck to you

[candy8360 0]

I can't even begin to imagine how I would feel. I know that I don't handle disappointment too well. I hate that you had to go through all that and feel so let down now.

[100lbsforsale 0]

LOL I definitely get the cumbya reference. I have had the exact thoughts the last few days. I don't see why I can't continue with the healthy lifestyle I was planning just because I won't have a band. I'm pretty sure it wasn't going to magically make me exercise nor was it going to knock the cookies/ice cream out of my hands if I reached for it. I have been sort of relieved too about not having to say good bye to sandwiches etc permanently. Yep I have an addiction too, but I have been disciplined on this pre-op diet, no reason it can't continue. (Not the liquid diet, but the ability to say no to myself. I've been pretty successful and I didn't die because I said nope, no ice cream tonight.) Keep your chin up. You'll do fine, you've already shown determination to get this far!!!

[Carolk1 0]

Oh, I would have been so mad. But things happen for a reason, maybe God has something better for you waiting.

Good Luck to you

I was actually pleased that the surgeon was smart enough and confident enough to stop and say - nope I'm not going to do this. I respect him very much for that decision....

[Twilight 2]

Carol,

I want to say "oh you poor thing." but it sounds so condescending. I feel so bad for you. I really can't put my emotion for you into words.

All the stress and buildup we go through to have this surgery done. All the mental rollercoaster riding we do. All the fighting and frustration with our friends and family and all the justifying we go through....and then you are this close.

I can just imagine the pain of finding out you have to not do this. And those stupid nurses. How dare they?? I imagine your heart is a little tender now but don't let this break your spirit.

I've been thinking about how all the things we have to do with the band.....chew slowly, completely, set down fork between bites....well I've been trying to train myself to do that before my band so that it won't be so stressful after it. And just those few things have been working to some extent on my liquid diet. It does help. Maybe being proactive at this point will help you while your heart heals.

Keep coming here and talking to us. You're still a merry loser even if you're doing it the "old fashioned way" (ish...that just gravels my butt!)

Twi (aka Steph)

[Carolk1 0]

Carol,

Keep coming here and talking to us. You're still a merry loser even if you're doing it the "old fashioned way" (ish...that just gravels my butt!)

All this posting right now is really helping me. My hubby is here, but you know how that goes, he's caught up in his emails and working. He's not really going to understand the emotional part of it...So, for now I'm not going to leave the board...I enjoy it too much.

[candy8360 0]

I know some people can be so condescending. It's like being a drug addict. Unless you've been there yourself you really have no idea what hell they can be going through.

[HeatherA 1]

Oh I'm so sorry! I'm also a little worried now... I had gallbladder surgery in 1996 and worry that my scar tissue may cause the same problem. I wonder where the scar tissue was the caused such a problem? Did he tell you?

[Carolk1 0]

Oh I'm so sorry! I'm also a little worried now... I had gallbladder surgery in 1996 and worry that my scar tissue may cause the same problem. I wonder where the scar tissue was the caused such a problem? Did he tell you?

I had open gallbladder surgery, not laproscopic. The scar is pretty big and apparently the scar tissue was so thick it created a wall or barrier near my stomach. Was your surgery open in 1996?