Help! Thinking about cancelling

[Sandra90 3]

Hello all! I’m scheduled to have gastric bypass surgery in 2 days 10/22/2020. I had my pre-op appointment yesterday and completed all my labs. Since the beginning of this process I wanted the sleeve but my surgeon feels like I will have greater results and long term results with the bypass. I’m 30, 5’8 and weigh 307. Highest weight 323. I have been going back and forth in my head about just going through with the bypass, but I have not came to peace about the decision as of yet. Has anyone experienced this before? Any advice will be appreciated. Thanks for reading!

[GreenTealael 25,430]

Hi 💓

If you made it this far into the process, you must be very serious about going through with it.

I don't know which part of the decision is causing hesitation but I would trust the Surgeon's suggestion because they have seen hundreds if not thousands of *similar* cases and have metrics to predict patient outcomes.

Also postponing surgery by a week or two instead of completely cancelling can be an option so you don't have to go through the entire process again.

Good Luck ♥️

Edited October 20, 2020 by GreenTealael

[Jaelzion 1,127]

Hi there. For me it was the other way around - I really wanted the bypass but my care team determined that it was medically contraindicated for me. I tried hard to change their minds but in the end I went with their recommendation. I was disappointed, but it turned out okay, I didn't have any major complications and the surgery has been effective so far.

However, in my case, there was an actual medical reason why the bypass was extra-risky for me. I got a 2nd opinion and the 2nd doctor agreed it was contraindicated. In your case, it sounds like the surgeon just feels the bypass will be more effective? If there is no medical contraindication, it seems like after being told the pros and cons, you would be allowed to choose the surgery you want. What would happen if you just said, "Look, I understand your reasoning, but I'm not comfortable with the bypass. I want the sleeve."? Would he refuse to do it? Could you get a 2nd opinion? Maybe if another doctor indicates that the sleeve is a viable option for you, your surgeon will relent. Have you shared your concerns about the bypass with your surgeon? Maybe with more information, you'll be more comfortable with it?

In any case, it doesn't seem right for you to be forced into a surgery you're not sure you want. You're the one who has to live with it, so you should be calling the shots (assuming there's no medical issue preventing the sleeve). I'd revisit the issue and get more information, then decide for myself one way or the other. Hope it all works out for you!

[Confirmed 28]

Hello I too have thought about cancelling I am on Nov 16th. But I have come this far and even began to buy supplies.

I don't know if I want the sleeve or the bypass my doctor says he is ok with either one so that doesn't help me decide.

I feel you will cheat yourself out of a fresh start and grow to regret staying in bad health.

I wish you all the best and wise decisions.

[BigSue 1,392]

I went into my initial consultation thinking that I wanted the sleeve, but my surgeon pushed me to get gastric bypass instead because I had a very high starting BMI (over 60). I had gotten the impression that the sleeve was a more modern, less risky, less extreme surgery, but my surgeon explained that the risks are about equal (although there are different risks), and gastric bypass typically results in more weight loss. I was unsure at the time, but as I learned more about both surgeries, I became more confident that gastric bypass was the right surgery. It might just be confirmation bias, but I've seen a lot of people talk about getting severe GERD with the sleeve, and/or not losing enough weight, and getting a revision to bypass.

What surgery you get is YOUR decision, though, so if you are not comfortable with it, you have the right to cancel. However, it's best to avoid making big decisions when you're in a heightened emotional state, so what were your thoughts a few weeks ago when the surgery was a little farther in the distance and you were in a calmer state of mind?

[The Greater Fool 2,054]

If you are not sure Gastric Bypass is what you want, perhaps you should cancel surgery. This is a life long choice and you need to be committed to it.

Your Doc works for you. Doc is your expert. Doc gave you an educated and experienced opinion on which surgery is best for you. Doc gave you reasons for the surgery suggested.

You need to be your own advocate.

If you don't want RNY, don't get it. No one is forcing you to have surgery.

If you want VSG, tell your Doc that's what you want.

This is a LIFE LONG choice you have to live with. You better be 100% sure about your choice.

Good luck,

Tek

[BayougirlMrsS 3,935]

1 hour ago, Sandra90 said:

Hello all! I’m scheduled to have gastric bypass surgery in 2 days 10/22/2020. I had my pre-op appointment yesterday and completed all my labs. Since the beginning of this process I wanted the sleeve but my surgeon feels like I will have greater results and long term results with the bypass. I’m 30, 5’8 and weigh 307. Highest weight 323. I have been going back and forth in my head about just going through with the bypass, but I have not came to peace about the decision as of yet. Has anyone experienced this before? Any advice will be appreciated. Thanks for reading!

@Sandra90 Is your concerns about the WLS.? Or the change in which one? You are feeling the way thousands of people have felt. It is normal to have fears about any SX. Your dr. has prob done thousands of WLS and if he/she thinks you would benefit from GB, I would listen. But i would also ask him/her why? Why does he/she think GB instead of VSG..... ask him/her to give you the facts on how it will affect you.... I've seen this happen before where the Dr. wants to do a different sx than what the patient wants..... and i would say 90% or greater said they were happy they listened.

I would call and tell him/her that you need to come in a talk... express your fears. Personally, i would not cancel, you waited too long. Your results with WLS will mostly depend on you and what you want out of it anyway..... No matter which one you get.

[ecugsplgrl 34]

I also went into my initial consult wanting the sleeve. My surgeon reviewed all three options that he offered, sleeve, RNY and DS. He advised that he felt I would get and retain the results I wanted with the DS however the choice would be mine ultimately to make. I did end up going with DS however he asked me even the day of surgery if I was still okay with my choice. I would speak to your surgeon about your concerns. These are elective procedures and the choice is yours

[STLoser 1,099]

I actually went into this wanting the sleeve, but the first surgeon I saw recommended RNY because my bmi was 69 and I have GERD. He did say he'd do what I wanted though
I researched and decided he was right. Then they laid him off because of COVID and I went to a different surgeon who recommended Loop DS, which I'd never heard of. He also said he'd do RNY. I researched it and decided the Loop DS was right for me. I'm 3 months post op and happy with my decision so far.
On you're really uncomfortable I'd talk to him.

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[mlmx1138 42]

I too went to see the surgeon convinced I wanted the sleeve and I was afraid of the bypass. The surgeon told me I would benefit more from the bypass. This is because I have diabetes and he said people have more success putting diabetes into "remission" (not having symptoms anymore) with the bypass. I also have a high BMI.

On 11/10, I am having the bypass because if I can kick diabetes to the curb I will. I have many diabetes complications; nephropathy, a damaged retina, an amputated toe, etc. To get off insulin and live without diabetes is like a dream. I have been reading about people who have had the bypass and now I no longer fear it, I'm looking forward to it!

If you have something like diabetes, I would take the doctor's advice. I've had it almost 20 years and it gets worse with age. I am more afraid to get older and older with my all health problems than of getting the bypass.

Just my $.002, I wish you well with whatever decision you make.

[Awesomensna0728 0]

I also wanted the sleeve. I have had GERD for do many years, my surgeon recommended the bypass. I am so glad I listened to him.

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[BypaSSSed 10]

My BMI is 39 and I was a candidate for either one; however, I suffer from bad heartburn. The doctor recommended the bypass vs sleeve for me. He said I would also have less chance to regain the weight due to the dumping syndrome "tool". I've done tons of research and know the bypass is right for me. Surgery is Monday! I think the nerves are normal. Good luck!