Pre-op diet and MURDER - I need a straightjacket!

[divaofsongs 42]

OMG! If I had to write a movie script and create the most horrendous situation, I could not come up with a scenario worse than what I am going through right now. (Not to mention what my poor DH is going through, he is on the phone right now making reservations for a hotel room for the next 2 weeks to get away from me! )

This pre-op diet may be the end of me and everyone in my general vicinity before I make it to surgery in 2 weeks.:frusty: I started my pre-op diet officially yesterday. In addition to no carbs, my doc also had the nerve to say NO DIET COKE! What???? :omg: Doesn't he realize that is my CRACK? I can live without sleep, I can live without sex, I can even live without Water (And believe me, I can. I drink about a glass of water a year.) but no Diet Coke? I'd rather give myself a hysterectomy with a meat fork!

Oh and I forgot to mention I also started my PERIOD! :angry I want to eat and I want to eat NOW! :hungry: I feel like a ferocious, hungry, rabid dog that hasn't had a meal in 3 weeks, smack dab in the middle of a room full of fat cats.

I think I am going to go to work tonight and fire the first 3 people that say hello to me. And, nobody better even think about bringing in fast-food.

If I post here tomorrow, you will know that I made it through today without committing murder or some other felonious activity. If you never hear from me again, please tune into your local news station. I'm sure the headline will read something like this, "Arizona woman, preparing for Lap-band surgery has been arrested for holding up a local McDonald's demanding Big Mac's, Fries, and Diet Coke's. She is currently awaiting trial at the Arizona Institute for the Criminally Insane."

[lindata 1]

Oh God, I love your posts! You should really think about journalling and writing a book after this whole experience - you're very good at describing things. Sorry, that's probably not what you want to hear right now.

It'll get better in a few more days. Not a lot better, but a little!

[mescla808 0]

This was a crack up for me, but i totally knew how you felt when i was in that stage. My hubby of 16 yrs ate the most pungent raw fish meal that i like in front of me and i wanted his head!!

Hang tough girl...

mes

[make33 2]

I too think you should have been a writer--what a hoot!!

BUT I must tell you that we ALL went through it (maybe not the same time as the monthly though, m'dear!) and came out unscathed. You and your diet coke must part the ways with no ifs ands or buts. Carbonation bad; flat drinks good.

As was said, please hang tough...

PS I was lucky enough to have my 18 day preop diet cut by 8 days when an opening came up--keep your fingers crossed!!!

[Shalee04 7]

Hehehhe yes I agree you have a way with words...

But that being said, Hang in there!! It will get better, I think I was at my worst at about 3 days into my 2 week pre-op.... My hubby was eating some chicken and asked me if I wanted to "Lick his fingers" I just aboput ripped his head off.... He worked late the next few nights and ate out before coming home, hehehheehe

Hang in there!!!!

[munchkin392 1]

While I can sympathize as I am doing my Dr.K preop diet also, it is not nearly as bad as the sucky clear liquid diet that I was on for my originally scheduled surgery here at home. I felt just like you when I was on that diet- I wanted to GNAW my leg off I was so hungry. My husband also wanted to kill me, and I don't think my coworkers were too thrilled with me either. I am a nurse, so there is ALWAYS a bunch of crap food lying around at work. Food that patients bring us, food that coworkers bake and bring in, you name it. No shortage of junk food, which made it all that much more difficult to follow the diet. So far I have found this diet much more tolerable only because I do actually get to eat REAL food, and not a bunch of chicken broth! Hang in there! We will get through this together! (Now only if I can quit craving cheesecake...):tired

[oneangelinva 0]

that is going to be me when i have to start the liquid diet but you would see local crazy women in virginia holds up local taco bell and eats everything lol you made my day with that post

[Cerrin 3]

I start my pre op in 12 days. I have been making apologies to everyone I come in contact with ahead of time. The maintinence crew told me they will put up the yellow caution tape for me that week. lol I told them to keep it handy.

[lindata 1]

If I post here tomorrow, you will know that I made it through today without committing murder or some other felonious activity. If you never hear from me again, please tune into your local news station. I'm sure the headline will read something like this, "Arizona woman, preparing for Lap-band surgery has been arrested for holding up a local McDonald's demanding Big Mac's, Fries, and Diet Coke's. She is currently awaiting trial at the Arizona Institute for the Criminally Insane."

So, did you make it through? How are you doing today? Is it getting better? The Protein shakes should help with hunger.

Linda

[Paulax 8]

Hey, you are funny as hell.

I HEAR YA, but I am here to give you a hug and tell you that this too shall pass, and you will soon be losing weight and feeling awesome!

[divaofsongs 42]

Ok, I made it through the night last night and didn't have to kill anyone or hold up a McDonald's. I am actually not very hungry this morning? I just cracked open an ice cold Atkin's shake, Mmmmm.

I thank you for letting me vent. I feel much better today.

[Skinny_Jill 36]

I didn't think I could ever live without my Diet Coke. People have always told me to give it up and I've always told them I would die before I would give it up. I haven't had one in 9 days and I am surviving. I had a headache the 1st night after surgery but I drank some tea and it helped. I am totally off of caffeine now and it actually feels good. Of course, it was easier to give up after surgery. I'm not sure if I could have done it before surgery. I teared up the night before surgery when I opened my last Diet Coke. I had a little ceremony. It was one of the saddest moments of my life.

You will survive!

[secretstolen 4]

I start my pre-op diet tomorrow morning. Fourteen days of Slim Fast Optima and Water.. deeeeeeelish! (Sarcasm.)

I had my last sweet tea and Chick-Fil-A sammich tonight.

And yeah, I'm gonna be sending out the office email to "my girls" at work to let them know my behavior over the next 2 weeks is only a by-product of my prep.

Good luck on your prep! If you need to vent, send me a message and I can be a friendly ear for you.

[divaofsongs 42]

I start my pre-op diet tomorrow morning. Fourteen days of Slim Fast Optima and Water.. deeeeeeelish! (Sarcasm.)

I had my last sweet tea and Chick-Fil-A sammich tonight.

And yeah, I'm gonna be sending out the office email to "my girls" at work to let them know my behavior over the next 2 weeks is only a by-product of my prep.

Good luck on your prep! If you need to vent, send me a message and I can be a friendly ear for you.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! Chick-Fil-A!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love Chick-Fil-A! Now I must get through this craving, LOL.

[secretstolen 4]

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! Chick-Fil-A!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love Chick-Fil-A! Now I must get through this craving, LOL.

Oh, crap! Sorry! Didn't realize I might trigger cravings!

I'm drinking my first Slim Fast of the AM.. woo.. :help: