me...we can't get along very well! I need advice FAST!

cookielover · November 24, 2007

I know I am being a spoiled child, but I am tired of this whole thing. It is hard, and sometimes I want to cry. I held on tight until I got my first fill. (I will make it...I can make it...I made it!) WONDER WOMAN! I followed my diet, exercised, and kept a positive attitude. The past 10 days have been really rough. I got my fill and nothing, well at first it was tight, but then it was as loose as a caboose. I became so hungry! I am so hungry that I can not stop eating. My stomach actually growls and hurts. I am drinking Water and Protein Drinks between meals, but it still is not enough. I also have to annoying issue of not being able to slow down when I eat, as I have no restriction, and chewing is not a problem. I just shovel the food in, and I am as good as gold. Last night I had my proper meal with my little plate and measured out meal, and 20 minutes later I could not take the hunger any more; I went to the kitchen and ate the rest of the meatloaf right out of the pan! (I did feel a little pressure in my chest, but nothing serious or uncomfortable.) Today I went to Starbucks with my daughter and I ate her dessert and I ordered banana loaf for me too. Since I was banded I have not consumed any Desserts. I mainly ate the bread to test my band...nope, nothing; nothing got stuck I not sure if I even have a band! To top my wonderful meal off I was still famished, and so I waited 30 minutes and go a venti mocha (w/o whip and non-fat.) I am still hungry. I feel as if I have been starved for 2 months! I am getting in 60 grams of Protein, drinking water, eating protein first, veggies second. I just don't know what to do. I am gaining weight like crazy. I only eat when I am hungry. Right now hunger seems to be a thread that is dominating my life right now. WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO WITH THIS CRAP? I was not prepared for this. I need some advice before I rip this thing out of my chest and sell it on e-bay.

CTgirl · November 24, 2007

Amy.... this will pass...put that day behind you and just take one day at a time... i can feel your frustration, and i know you feel like giving up, but hang in there for that "sweet spot"...i know it takes a different number of fills for everyone, but it will happen....you have been doing such a GREAT job so far.... all of us have had bad days...just look at it like that....nothing more...tommorrow is a new day....remember how far you've come so far and hold onto that.... we are all banded for a reason...we have problems with food....it's a process...we are all learning, and we all have good and bad days .... hopefully we have may more good days than bad ones.... please don't be so hard on yourself....you CAN do this....you HAVE been doing a great job....hang onto all your successes so far until that restriction kicks in !!!!!!!!!

eileen

cookielover · November 25, 2007

How do you get the restriction? (I mean; I know how.) What I want to know is should I call my surgeon and bug him? It has only been 10 days. What would you guys do if you were running out of food to consume?

HappyCamper · November 25, 2007

I feel your frustration. I'm right there with you. I have had 2 fills and feel no restriction. I've managed to lose 40 pounds by pure willpower, but now my willpower is running out and hunger taking over. To top it off, I have to wait two months between fills. I have three more weeks before I can get another fill. It seems like a lifetime.

CTgirl · November 25, 2007

Amy....how long does your doc make you wait between fills...the one thing that has helped me is knowing that once i have my first fill, i can get one every 2 weeks until i hit that "sweet spot"..... i know it will happen eventually......i have been overweight for so long and just feel so lucky that this tool is available.... i'll be paying it off years, i joke that it's like buying a new car, but i'd rather have this opportunity than a new car anyday..... my mom even jokes about me driving my new rolls royce..... none of us got to this point overnight....and i think alot of us are coming to terms with the fact that this is a tool, not a magic band that will instantly make us thin....it will be work, and we will all have our ups and downs, but we can all do it.....i know i can do it, and i know YOU can do it amy....you have been doing GREAT so far, and you've hit a bump in the road.....just try to get back on track and be kind to yourself....we are all in this together, and i know that i don't feel so alone when i see that others are struggling just like me.....don't let slipping back into some old habits for a day or two mess with your head....you have been one of the people that i have always looked to since i found this site for your positive attitude, commitment and sense of humor....if you're not feeling it right know, draw your strength from someone else.....read some of carrots posts...shes doing great now, and i know that i will be feeling like that someday too....i think that's the whole point of this board, drawing strength from others...we'll all probably take turns being the leader....you've been the strongest for a long time, just lean on the rest of us and you'll be back on top in no time......remember, one day at a time....i hope you're feeling better today :wacko: eileen

trapped inside · November 25, 2007

Amy, I too feel your pain. I have not been filled yet and in the evenings I am ravenous! I find I do better if I eat about every three hours. Please keep trying to measure and do all the wonderful things you have been doing. I bought little spoons and forks that I got at TJ Max. It forces me to take smaller bites and makes the meal last longer. I too have gained back a few pounds and I know I'm eating way less than I use to. I think its the bodies way of dealing with the previous starvation. Hang in there. In 6-9 months we are all going to be in a different place (and smaller clothes!).

Carrot06 · November 25, 2007

I am sending out the rescue boat! Grab the floatation device! You are not going to go under this ocean of being overweight again! I can tell you are so frustrated and I would be too if I was having the hunger pangs like you are. Take a breath..... 1,2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9,10.... Okay- now when will your doctor let you get your next fill? If it is a long ways out- I would give him a call and discuss the situation with him. I know many call the time before the fill "bandster hell," but it sounds like for many the time until you get to that sweet spot is rough as well. I will more than likely get my first fill tomorrow at my appointment. So I will see how my first fill is then. This sounds like it is one of those things where everyone gets different results. Some notice a change on first fill, and some don't yet. But don't lose hope. There will be a fill that will take you to that sweet spot. Just hang in there and continue the awesome job you have done at exercising, Protein, etc. Keep building up muscle which will be shaping your body and adding tone. Keep up the cardio. Continue practising the rules of band life as much as you can and call your doctor about fills. I know you are in freak out mode right now- I think we all take turns having our freak out sessions. It will pass. You can do it! And the weight will come off.

DonHoll1 · November 25, 2007

I agree with Carrot . I would call the doctor.Donna

Jachut · November 25, 2007

I found that I still lost weight, but that my meal size took several fills to really come down. It reduced by about 1/3 initially and then over the coming months and more fills I got down to about 3/4 of a cup of food per meal. I had a burst of restriction after each fill that waned very quickly, so I lost a few kilos then maintained (or lost slowly) to the next fill.

Your body gradually reduces its calorie needs as you lose weight, and at first most people can probably eat quite well and still lose, I'd try to fill in the gap with exercise and relax about it, let your intake reduce as your fill levels increase. You no doubt need a second fill pretty soon, but you dont have to starve to death, if you're hungry, eat reasonable, just try not to overeat.

Good restriction and constant, steady weightloss takes some people a while to achieve, and others like me find that they lose anyway, but that they need that increasing restriction over time to keep losing.

cookielover · November 25, 2007

I worked myself up, and up, and up, and up. Man I hate it when I do that. Today for the first time I saw (what are those things called again...) collar bones! Just a hint mind you, but they were there! I just don't ever want to go back, and I am sure you all can understand. I didn't mean to throw a temper tantrum in the middle of the message board.

The truth is: I lost someone who was very close to me because of my WLS. Here is the link to the famous break-up if you didn't catch it: http://www.lapbandtalk.com/f17/i-feel-like-such-fool-warning-post-contains-break-up-email-45375/ There is no turning back to that relationship, but I know I feel that I have extra external pressure to succeed. My husband thinks that I am eating more, because then I can "fail" and therefore "salvage" the relationship. (He majored in psychology.) If I am fat she will still like me, and come back. The truth is every time the phone rings or I get an email I hope it is her. But today I SLAMMED the door shut. I bought my daughter hampsters! She has deathly alergy to hampsters. If they are even on your clothes she can't be around you; she has to give her self an epi-pen shot and go to the hospital. Now there is no way we can be together.

I guess I just don't feel like myself right now. I am not "happy"; I am just hanging on. If you want to know the truth I was abused by this person. Nothing I did was good enough. I even got in poop for buying her a gift because I did not present it in the way she wanted it presented. (It was a 400.00 Mickey Mouse figurine) I couldn't leave toothpaste in the sink, or I would get yelled at. The list is too long to mention here. My question is if it was so bad why do I feel so lousy now? All of you will tell me she was no good, and that I am better off, and I know that to be a fact as well. I guess the main problem that I am having is the reason she left: my WLS. I shake my head at myself and think, "Amy you are smarter than this. You have many friends that support you. Why are you letting this happen? Errrrrrr." Oh well that is why I am a little down.

And yes I am sure in 6 months I will be in a better place too. I am just wondering what to do with her Christmas present? I think I will donate it. You know what else bugs me? I have choosen the high road, but sometimes I really want to take the LOW road. Oh well in the end I am sure it will matter, but right now...I have to work on me.

Carrot06 · November 26, 2007

Amy- I posted to you on the other thread this originated from regarding your friend. I am so sorry.... You had not mentioned anything about this so I was so caught off gaurd after reading this. I am here for you...