Eating out or at others homes...

[DanieHall 46]

So I am scheduled for gastric sleeve on Monday (woo hoo!), and am curious how others handle eating out when you get past the liquid and puréed foods stages. What do you eat? Do people drive you nuts by trying to make you eat more? Can you “hide” that you aren’t eating tons so other don’t ask nosey questions? Just wondering - thanks in advance!!

[GradyCat 3,695]

I eat out once or twice a week with my husband and I order something sensible like a grilled chicken breast or salmon and I give him the side dishes. When I eat out with friends, I choose places where I know I can order something healthy, like a Breakfast place that offers eggs. It can be done.

[NYJenn 1,463]

I don’t eat out, it’s so not worth it. But if I do, I get a take out box or split something with my husband or tween son

[GreenTealael 25,439]

I used to only nurse drinks early on

then later into my journey i would order the smallest size meal i could eat

finally now i either order a regular full size meal /eating what i want/ carrying out the rest or share a meal with someone where they eat the majority.

Edited June 8, 2019 by GreenTealael

[sillykitty 10,776]

The good news is, there is always something reasonably healthy to eat on every menu, although it might take a few tweaks

The bad news is, IME, for the first year my capacity was so restricted I always attracted attention because of how little I ate. Just expect it and be ready with an answer!

[Kris77 1,538]

My husband and I always split a meal. We order sides that are usually low carb-broccoli green beans-) now a days the way restaurants make plates splitting is the most sensible thing and we still have tons Of left overs.

[allwet 868]

On 6/7/2019 at 4:57 PM, DanieHall said:

What do you eat

appetizers. Try to know where your going and check the menu online.

get your drink in a to go cup or just have Water while waiting for order.

cant say i enjoyed eating out for a long time post op cause i just couldn't shake the feeling i was wasting my money.

[JanJan19 205]

On 6/7/2019 at 6:57 PM, DanieHall said:

So I am scheduled for gastric sleeve on Monday (woo hoo!), and am curious how others handle eating out when you get past the liquid and puréed foods stages. What do you eat? Do people drive you nuts by trying to make you eat more? Can you “hide” that you aren’t eating tons so other don’t ask nosey questions? Just wondering - thanks in advance!!

Hi Danie! I am only a few weeks ahead of you so I can offer my thoughts on what the first couple of weeks will look like for you. The first time I went to a restaurant was 15 days post op. If I'd gone before that, I'd probably have been super annoyed because there'd have been nearly nothing I could order. Though, depending on the situation I suppose you could (not that you'd want to) go to a Panera and order something like chicken Soup and then only eat the broth. It would just be a real bummer.

I ate out with a friend that does not know I've had the surgery just two weeks post surgery. We went to a breakfast place and I had coffee until my food arrived, the just set it aside and never took another sip. No one seemed to notice this at all. For food, I ordered a scrambler (scrambled eggs, veggies, cheese) and asked for cottage cheese instead of hash browns. When they asked what toast I wanted I just said wheat, knowing full well I'd take it to go & crumble it up for the birds. At this stage, it just felt like the easier option than refusing toast.

Food arrived, I probably ate 1/4 or 1/3 of the eggs. And honestly it wasn't a big deal. I said to my friend I went low carb & was cutting back. She ordered a pile of sugary crepes and enjoyed them. It didn't bother me in the least to see someone else eating something yummy. Already at this point, eggs and cheese is heaven for me.

I've heard people mention that waitress will be like "is your food okay" when you eat less than half of it. It's fine. So much of it is your body language and how you handle it on your end. For me for this meal, I probably had my fork in my hand for a good long while as we were yapping and eating & I was pacing myself. But also, it probably looked like I was still picking at it. Eventually the waitress asked if I wanted a box. No big deal.

At one point my friend was like, oh wow I just ate this entire plate and you've not eaten nearly as much. I super casually was like "oh I had a Protein Shake this morning." Honestly the girl had no clue and I flat out told her many times last year that I wanted to have gastric sleeve. Admittedly, I'm sure I said it flippantly and she didn't take me THAT seriously, but the thing is... no one pays any damn attention to anything but themselves most of the time. Example, even when she noticed that she'd cleared her plate & I hadn't. That wasn't about ME, it was about her. She was (I'm assuming) thinking crap did I just wolf that down?

So for sure, you can fake it through a meal if you don't want people to know. Say you just ate or you've gone Keto. Whatever.

As far as trying to make you eat more - there will ALWAYS be situations. It's really up to you to say no. My own damn mother (who knows I had this done & how hard I'm trying) showed me a recipe last week for something she loves that's low carb. I looked at it and said "looks great, but too many calories for me at this stage." Today she stopped by my house and brought me a container of the same thing I just last week told her no on. I told her to take it right back out the door with her. When you're in a 500-700 calorie a day phase, you will guard those calories fiercely.

[DanieHall 46]

On 06/10/2019 at 22:12, JanJan19 said:

Hi Danie! I am only a few weeks ahead of you so I can offer my thoughts on what the first couple of weeks will look like for you. The first time I went to a restaurant was 15 days post op. If I'd gone before that, I'd probably have been super annoyed because there'd have been nearly nothing I could order. Though, depending on the situation I suppose you could (not that you'd want to) go to a Panera and order something like chicken Soup and then only eat the broth. It would just be a real bummer.



I ate out with a friend that does not know I've had the surgery just two weeks post surgery. We went to a Breakfast place and I had coffee until my food arrived, the just set it aside and never took another sip. No one seemed to notice this at all. For food, I ordered a scrambler (scrambled eggs, veggies, cheese) and asked for cottage cheese instead of hash browns. When they asked what toast I wanted I just said wheat, knowing full well I'd take it to go & crumble it up for the birds. At this stage, it just felt like the easier option than refusing toast.



Food arrived, I probably ate 1/4 or 1/3 of the eggs. And honestly it wasn't a big deal. I said to my friend I went low carb & was cutting back. She ordered a pile of sugary crepes and enjoyed them. It didn't bother me in the least to see someone else eating something yummy. Already at this point, eggs and cheese is heaven for me.



I've heard people mention that waitress will be like "is your food okay" when you eat less than half of it. It's fine. So much of it is your body language and how you handle it on your end. For me for this meal, I probably had my fork in my hand for a good long while as we were yapping and eating & I was pacing myself. But also, it probably looked like I was still picking at it. Eventually the waitress asked if I wanted a box. No big deal.



At one point my friend was like, oh wow I just ate this entire plate and you've not eaten nearly as much. I super casually was like "oh I had a Protein Shake this morning." Honestly the girl had no clue and I flat out told her many times last year that I wanted to have gastric sleeve. Admittedly, I'm sure I said it flippantly and she didn't take me THAT seriously, but the thing is... no one pays any damn attention to anything but themselves most of the time. Example, even when she noticed that she'd cleared her plate & I hadn't. That wasn't about ME, it was about her. She was (I'm assuming) thinking crap did I just wolf that down?



So for sure, you can fake it through a meal if you don't want people to know. Say you just ate or you've gone Keto. Whatever.



As far as trying to make you eat more - there will ALWAYS be situations. It's really up to you to say no. My own damn mother (who knows I had this done & how hard I'm trying) showed me a recipe last week for something she loves that's low carb. I looked at it and said "looks great, but too many calories for me at this stage." Today she stopped by my house and brought me a container of the same thing I just last week told her no on. I told her to take it right back out the door with her. When you're in a 500-700 calorie a day phase, you will guard those calories fiercely.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!! I super appreciate your reply it so hits home and helps me! How are things going for you with your surgery? I have almost a month out and while I haven’t lost what I consider an awesome amount of weight I just simply feel great - I used to be a huge binge eater and fast food junkie, I could absolutely not pass up French fries no matter how much I wanted to! I would eat massive amounts of unhealthy foods until I felt sick but then would just keep eating. I do not feel that way at ALL now! It’s so refreshing! I took my kid to McDonalds and got him a meal and got some unsweetened iced tea for myself and had absolutely zero desire to order something bad for myself and just went home and had some low fat cottage cheese and went on my merry way. It’s really helped me change my frame of mind and I’m so grateful for that. I was very nervous about eating in restaurants but honestly now I think it’ll be fine and am so happy!! Thanks again!

[domi 237]

In the beginning, going out was a little tough just learning what to choose. My family was great. WE went to the habit and I would order the tuna steak all by itself, no bread or I would just order a burger patty from other fast food restaurants. Then we ventured out more. I love ordering shrimp cocktail as my meal. I will also just eat off my families plates sometimes. My husband says I'm a cheap date. I also order in to-go containers, then take my leftovers to work. Most of my friends and family have been very supportive and accommodating.

[notmyname 593]

I tend to steer my friends to tapas or small plates places. That way we're all sharing, I can make sure there's at least one or two things I can eat, and nobody really notices how much I eat or don't eat.

[S@ssen@ch 745]

I eat out fairly regularly. Sometimes my husband and I share. Sometimes I get an appetizer for my meal. Sometimes I just order a side dish. You get the picture.

Generally, I order what I want. I eat until I'm satisfied, then take home the rest. I can usually get at least 2 meals out of those leftovers (in fact, I get tired of eating it long before I've finished it and my dogs are really enjoying the extras)

When eating out in social situations, people are much more concerned with themselves and/or their conversations to notice what you're doing or not doing. I have NEVER had someone try to push more food on me. I've had a few occasions where family or friends either think I don't like the food or am sick. It doesn't happen often and it really isn't a big deal. If someone has the courage to ask, I tell them I'm trying to eat healthier and learning to stop when I'm satisfied is part of my practice.

[JanJan19 205]

On 7/4/2019 at 7:42 PM, DanieHall said:

On 6/10/2019 at 9:12 PM, JanJan19 said:

Hi Danie! I am only a few weeks ahead of you so I can offer my thoughts on what the first couple of weeks will look like for you. The first time I went to a restaurant was 15 days post op. If I'd gone before that, I'd probably have been super annoyed because there'd have been nearly nothing I could order. Though, depending on the situation I suppose you could (not that you'd want to) go to a Panera and order something like chicken Soup and then only eat the broth. It would just be a real bummer.



I ate out with a friend that does not know I've had the surgery just two weeks post surgery. We went to a Breakfast place and I had coffee until my food arrived, the just set it aside and never took another sip. No one seemed to notice this at all. For food, I ordered a scrambler (scrambled eggs, veggies, cheese) and asked for cottage cheese instead of hash browns. When they asked what toast I wanted I just said wheat, knowing full well I'd take it to go & crumble it up for the birds. At this stage, it just felt like the easier option than refusing toast.



food arrived, I probably ate 1/4 or 1/3 of the eggs. And honestly it wasn't a big deal. I said to my friend I went low carb & was cutting back. She ordered a pile of sugary crepes and enjoyed them. It didn't bother me in the least to see someone else eating something yummy. Already at this point, eggs and cheese is heaven for me.



I've heard people mention that waitress will be like "is your food okay" when you eat less than half of it. It's fine. So much of it is your body language and how you handle it on your end. For me for this meal, I probably had my fork in my hand for a good long while as we were yapping and eating & I was pacing myself. But also, it probably looked like I was still picking at it. Eventually the waitress asked if I wanted a box. No big deal.



At one point my friend was like, oh wow I just ate this entire plate and you've not eaten nearly as much. I super casually was like "oh I had a Protein Shake this morning." Honestly the girl had no clue and I flat out told her many times last year that I wanted to have gastric sleeve. Admittedly, I'm sure I said it flippantly and she didn't take me THAT seriously, but the thing is... no one pays any damn attention to anything but themselves most of the time. Example, even when she noticed that she'd cleared her plate & I hadn't. That wasn't about ME, it was about her. She was (I'm assuming) thinking crap did I just wolf that down?



So for sure, you can fake it through a meal if you don't want people to know. Say you just ate or you've gone Keto. Whatever.



As far as trying to make you eat more - there will ALWAYS be situations. It's really up to you to say no. My own damn mother (who knows I had this done & how hard I'm trying) showed me a recipe last week for something she loves that's low carb. I looked at it and said "looks great, but too many calories for me at this stage." Today she stopped by my house and brought me a container of the same thing I just last week told her no on. I told her to take it right back out the door with her. When you're in a 500-700 calorie a day phase, you will guard those calories fiercely.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!! I super appreciate your reply it so hits home and helps me! How are things going for you with your surgery? I have almost a month out and while I haven’t lost what I consider an awesome amount of weight I just simply feel great - I used to be a huge binge eater and fast food junkie, I could absolutely not pass up French fries no matter how much I wanted to! I would eat massive amounts of unhealthy foods until I felt sick but then would just keep eating. I do not feel that way at ALL now! It’s so refreshing! I took my kid to McDonalds and got him a meal and got some unsweetened iced tea for myself and had absolutely zero desire to order something bad for myself and just went home and had some low fat cottage cheese and went on my merry way. It’s really helped me change my frame of mind and I’m so grateful for that. I was very nervous about eating in restaurants but honestly now I think it’ll be fine and am so happy!! Thanks again!

Everything has been picture perfect since my surgery. I too thought I'd have lost more - but I think I based that on this forum & seeing people talking about losing 30 pounds in a week. That has never been the case for me. I think the highest week loss was 6 pounds. I hit a stall a couple weeks ago & lost 1, this past week was 3.4. Surgery date was May 23 & my total loss is at 28 pounds.

There's an app called get-2-goal which has been helpful in terms of where I should be. According to that I'm more than on pace. My doctor is happy with my loss thus far as well.

Thus far, nothing has bothered me. I really don't think anything is going to bother me. I haven't yet had sugar (other than grapes or strawberries) but I'm pretty sure it won't bother me. So for me this sleeve is a tool to eat less, but it's not going to make me sick the way it does some people when they eat bad things.

[New&Improved 1,780]

Try to find the best alternatives when eating out. Ask the waiter what's in the meal they may be able to change it to suit you.

Going to friends pack your own food or take a shake with you to fill you up so you don't need to eat much