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How to tell my Child



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My Daugher is 11 years old and I will be having the gastric by pass late summer. How will I tell her that I'm getting surgery?

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My Daugher is 11 years old and I will be having the gastric by pass late summer. How will I tell her that I'm getting surgery?
Hello,
My youngest daughter is 11 and my son's 10. I'm a mom of 6 and my kids have an seen me struggle with my weight. I started trying to eat healthier and get more active this past year and a half and was transparent with my kids. I wanted to try to be an encourager to them to do better and choose better for themselves. They asked questions, I answered them to the best of my knowledge. I showed them the charts the doctor and dieticians gave me. Explained to them my surgical choice and why I chose it. Kids are so strong and it's great to hear their side of different scenarios as well. My son told his teacher that I was having surgery and she if course asked what and why and bless his heart, he couldn't remember gastric bypass and who would at his age but what he did remember was that his mommy's new stomach was going to be in the shape of an egg.[emoji173]️ My greatest cheerleaders are my husband and children. That makes me run the extra mile to keep going! I'm 2 weeks post op, currently. Best of luck to you! [emoji119]

Sent from my PH-1 using BariatricPal mobile app

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I didn’t...my kids were 9 and 4 at the time

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Put it in the framework that you are doing this to be s better parent, for more energy and a longer life for her . I wouldn’t dwell on the guts and gore of the situation , just reiterate the positive things that will come with s healthier you..kids are smart , I’m sure she will worry.. encourage her to tell you all she’s feeling so she’s not scared and trying to be strong., it will be great, you’re giving her the gift of a healthier you!

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I have 2 wee-lings (8yo, 7yo) and I've been up front with them, in an age appropriate manner, from the beginning. They have known from a very young age that I had to take a lot of medicines (diabetes, high blood pressure, cholesterol) because I am overweight. They knew about my medical conditions because I felt it important that they know how to call for help if something ever happened to me when it was just us. They've grown up knowing that it's super important to eat healthy and be active. They know that because of my medical history, they are at risk too, and they have to take care of themselves.

When I made the decision to pursue WLS, after I had talked it over with my hubs, I sat them down and talked to them about it. I told them that I was tired of all the medication I had to take, I was tired of not having the energy to play with them, and I wanted to be able to go on the rides at the fair with them. It meant that I would have a lot of appointments (my program is 2 years from orientation to surgery) and that ultimately I'd have an operation.

Then I enlisted their help. I told them that I would need help with remembering to eat better and to exercise, and let me tell you, no one nags like a 5 or 6yo. They stayed with their grandparents while I had surgery, so that my hubs didn't have to worry about them and me... and our 7yo had a rough night of being concerned about me. Now that I'm on the far side of surgery, they are great at helping me with little things as I recover (my youngest carried our shopping bag at the farmer's market this morning and didn't let go of my hand, in case I got tired).

Kids are smart. They know when something's going on. It's important to educate them honestly so that they don't get stressed out about things they don't understand.

Just my two cents.

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First of all talk to them like adults. There's no shame in surgery. If they are curious just say you had some issues with health and you need to get better and best way is surgery to get the weight off.

Try not to make it seem like you're ashamed otherwise it may make them feel bad if or when they have weight issues

Be open honest involve them

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