Stress and poor food choices

[amy6152 70]

I'd been doing so well since my surgery, but the last two weeks have been brutal. My stress level's been high for months because my teenage son's struggling with mental health issues and been out of school since September, but I was managing to stay on program. (My work suffered, but that's another story.) Fast forward to a month ago, and my 11 year-old daughter has been diagnosed with a debilitating chronic pain syndrome no one in our town knows how to treat. I went into full mama bear mode, researching everything and reading medical journals and locating a treatment program some five hours away at one of the best children's hospitals in the country, but my daughter's getting worse by the DAY and sometimes sobs in what she says is ten out of ten pain. Finally got the call from the good hospital that they can see her in two weeks, but God only knows if that will be in-patient or driving back and forth all the time or WHAT. I'm grateful she got in and hopeful this make a difference and puts this beast into remission, at least for a while, but meanwhile my eating has gone into the toilet. There is no doubt in my mind I'm eating for comfort. None. Every day I try to get back on track and by late afternoon I'm crying uncle. I just had this surgery so what the heck am I doing? But I sit there in the moment and desperately try to think of something else I could do that would make me feel better, and there's NOTHING. Just nothing. One bit of good news, my son started back at school two days ago, so at least we're moving in the tunnel (even if I don't see any light yet) instead of camped out inside it. I don't know what I'm looking for posting here. I don't know what can change my behavior right now. Just throwing it out there to the universe!!!

[ldawn 178]

Are there any comfort foods that can be modified to fit your diet? Like air fried chicken and loaded mashed cauliflower? Tacos in lettuce leafs? I’m sorry I know those are lame suggestions that you probably already know.

I went through a lot of stress a couple years ago. I swear I was going to throat punch the next person who told me “God doesn’t give you more than you can handle.” Wish I could say something to help.

[MMME 89]

I'm a stress eater, too. I'm also a cake decorator, so I have temptation around the house. A lot of temptation in the form of yummy yummy cakes and various icings/decorations. I've found myself eating my decorating mistakes and thinking "what the hell am I doing?"!

You have a lot on your mind right now and you have to handle your stress whatever way works for you. You know what you're doing right and what is probably not quite as right and what you need to do to get back on track. Fingers crossed your daughter gets treatment soon and that your son can find his way back to school full time. (My son suffered with mental health issues for most of his life so I have some understanding of the stress that goes with that)

[ummyasmin 1,603]

I'd been doing so well since my surgery, but the last two weeks have been brutal. My stress level's been high for months because my teenage son's struggling with mental health issues and been out of school since September, but I was managing to stay on program. (My work suffered, but that's another story.) Fast forward to a month ago, and my 11 year-old daughter has been diagnosed with a debilitating chronic pain syndrome no one in our town knows how to treat. I went into full mama bear mode, researching everything and reading medical journals and locating a treatment program some five hours away at one of the best children's hospitals in the country, but my daughter's getting worse by the DAY and sometimes sobs in what she says is ten out of ten pain. Finally got the call from the good hospital that they can see her in two weeks, but God only knows if that will be in-patient or driving back and forth all the time or WHAT. I'm grateful she got in and hopeful this make a difference and puts this beast into remission, at least for a while, but meanwhile my eating has gone into the toilet. There is no doubt in my mind I'm eating for comfort. None. Every day I try to get back on track and by late afternoon I'm crying uncle. I just had this surgery so what the heck am I doing? But I sit there in the moment and desperately try to think of something else I could do that would make me feel better, and there's NOTHING. Just nothing. One bit of good news, my son started back at school two days ago, so at least we're moving in the tunnel (even if I don't see any light yet) instead of camped out inside it. I don't know what I'm looking for posting here. I don't know what can change my behavior right now. Just throwing it out there to the universe!!!

Oh wow hun, that's a crap load of stress. I don't have anything I can say except I pray it gets better for you and your fam.

Sent from my SM-G930F using BariatricPal mobile app

[GradyCat 3,695]

My only suggestion would be to have a lot of Protein chips, protein chocolate and other semi-healthy "comfort foods" to turn to when your stress is at its peak. Take care.

[Wanda247 908]

15 hours ago, amy6152 said:

I'd been doing so well since my surgery, but the last two weeks have been brutal. My stress level's been high for months because my teenage son's struggling with mental health issues and been out of school since September, but I was managing to stay on program. (My work suffered, but that's another story.) Fast forward to a month ago, and my 11 year-old daughter has been diagnosed with a debilitating chronic pain syndrome no one in our town knows how to treat. I went into full mama bear mode, researching everything and reading medical journals and locating a treatment program some five hours away at one of the best children's hospitals in the country, but my daughter's getting worse by the DAY and sometimes sobs in what she says is ten out of ten pain. Finally got the call from the good hospital that they can see her in two weeks, but God only knows if that will be in-patient or driving back and forth all the time or WHAT. I'm grateful she got in and hopeful this make a difference and puts this beast into remission, at least for a while, but meanwhile my eating has gone into the toilet. There is no doubt in my mind I'm eating for comfort. None. Every day I try to get back on track and by late afternoon I'm crying uncle. I just had this surgery so what the heck am I doing? But I sit there in the moment and desperately try to think of something else I could do that would make me feel better, and there's NOTHING. Just nothing. One bit of good news, my son started back at school two days ago, so at least we're moving in the tunnel (even if I don't see any light yet) instead of camped out inside it. I don't know what I'm looking for posting here. I don't know what can change my behavior right now. Just throwing it out there to the universe!!!

Hi there...You are under a lot of stress and my heart goes out to you, my one and only son had medical issues as well growing up which entailed a lot of ICU stays in many hospitals, some close to home and some far away from home, so I can relate just a little because your load is much larger.

This is just a thought because I am totally not in your shoes honey but you know when we get on airplanes and they go over the drill and tell us if an emergency happens, even if we have kids we are to put on our oxygen mask first before securing it on our kids because if we cannot take care of ourselves first then we are no good to our children...so try your best to take a little time for yourself and regroup, prepare some healthy Snacks and make food that you can get to quick and not make the worst choices, you went through a lot to have surgery and you deserve to be healthy and feel good too. Make a meatloaf, bake some chicken, (food that you can get to quick and heat in the microwave) buy Protein Bars, pre-made Protein Shakes etc. that you can just throw in your purse when on the go taking your daughter to the hospital...I know it's hard but take care of you so you can give the best care to your children.

Our children mean the world to us and we would rather endure their pain if we could switch places, but mommy please take care of you first (it may sound selfish, but it's really not) so that you can have the strength to care for your babies.

I think you did the right thing my reaching out on the site because we get you and understand...if you mess up and eat something bad it's ok, we are all imperfect humans and you are aware of it so you are to be commended considering what you are going through. You will get a lot of good advice here

Take care of you and your kids and we are here for you ((Hugs))

Edited February 14, 2019 by Wanda247

[KMac2018 10]

I am so sorry you are going through this. I totally understand why you are stress eating. Do you have support? I am a big believer in therapy if you're open to that. Having a place to process feelings can really be a lifesaver through very hard times. Your children are in my thoughts.

Kat

[FluffyChix 17,415]

Wow! What a crapton of stress and worry! I get it! Life definitely happens while we're trying to improve ourselves!! I think the idea of having low carb/low fat/healthier options on hand will be very helpful. I also think it's important to get up each day (only take that 1 day) and make a 1-10 check list of plans. Scratch them off as you complete them. Make doing self-care part of that plan. Cuz if you're well, the kids will be healthier.

Try making yourself a deal for 1 day only. Make a deal not to have ANYTHING sweet all day (whether or not that is sugar or sugar subs). And include making it a no crap day--so no chips crackers etc. If you need to clean all the crap out of the pantry, frig and freezer! The kids don't need the crap either! Lock it in the trunk of your car if you must! Then any time you're hungry, drink a glass of Water as quickly as you can. Then wait 20 minutes--get busy with something else. If at the end of 20 minutes you are still hungry and it's not time for your meal, then have a small Protein and veggie based 100cal snack. Follow your rules of eating/drinking. If it is time to eat, then have your meal that you've planned.

The rule is that if you're hungry, you eat protein/veg at 100cals per pop. No sweet. I use things like boiled eggs, al dente steamed broccoli, raw veg like leafy greens, rbp, carrots, celery, etc. If I'm hungry enough to eat, then I will eat a boiled egg and some veg! Hard to binge when you're full of boiled egg and veg!

Then once you complete the day...do it again tomorrow. Just only commit for 1 day.

If you screw up, then continue moving forward taking the next best bite. Don't throw the day away cuz of a slip or an isolated meal or snack. Put the snack in the trash, get the crap out of the house...etc.

You can do this. It IS worth it! You are worth it. Your family is worth it.

Find a counselor!!! Talk to your doc and RD!!!! Get them to help. It is in their best interest to help you through this rough patch, cuz you are part of their outcomes of surgery. They want to have good stats.

[FluffyChix 17,415]

[megolego 69]

I'm so sorry you are going though this. Speaking with a counselor or attending a support group might help but also try not to beat yourself up about it. Focus on the changes you can do starting now that will help you get back on track. I've had some trouble finding some good "on-the-go" Snacks but those are really helpful so that I don't get really hungry and then binge on whatever I eat next. Good luck to you and your family.

[Chris56 21]

I too fell into the trap of eating poorly due to two kids with mental health issues. Know you are not alone. There are more of you out there then you know. Don’t feel guilty about anything. As moms we try our best. I agree that having simple healthy no thinking foods around might help you. My go to as a busy mom is greek yogurt. Grab and go and eat on the run. Hugs!!!!

[Georgetown 253]

On 2/13/2019 at 8:11 PM, amy6152 said:

I'd been doing so well since my surgery, but the last two weeks have been brutal. My stress level's been high for months because my teenage son's struggling with mental health issues and been out of school since September, but I was managing to stay on program. (My work suffered, but that's another story.) Fast forward to a month ago, and my 11 year-old daughter has been diagnosed with a debilitating chronic pain syndrome no one in our town knows how to treat. I went into full mama bear mode, researching everything and reading medical journals and locating a treatment program some five hours away at one of the best children's hospitals in the country, but my daughter's getting worse by the DAY and sometimes sobs in what she says is ten out of ten pain. Finally got the call from the good hospital that they can see her in two weeks, but God only knows if that will be in-patient or driving back and forth all the time or WHAT. I'm grateful she got in and hopeful this make a difference and puts this beast into remission, at least for a while, but meanwhile my eating has gone into the toilet. There is no doubt in my mind I'm eating for comfort. None. Every day I try to get back on track and by late afternoon I'm crying uncle. I just had this surgery so what the heck am I doing? But I sit there in the moment and desperately try to think of something else I could do that would make me feel better, and there's NOTHING. Just nothing. One bit of good news, my son started back at school two days ago, so at least we're moving in the tunnel (even if I don't see any light yet) instead of camped out inside it. I don't know what I'm looking for posting here. I don't know what can change my behavior right now. Just throwing it out there to the universe!!!

First of all wow! You’ve got a lot going on but first and foremost you need to take care of yourself! I know that’s hard when your children are struggling but try to remember that the food is only a very temporary “fix” for your problem. You have very little control over what’s happening with your kids but you have full control over what you put in your mouth. I’m not sure what stage you’re in but try to have healthy Snacks available to you so you can just grab a good choice. I hope this helps a little

I wish you the best of luck with everything!!!!

[amy6152 70]

Thank you for the words of encouragement and suggestions. They really helped! I was completely back on program yesterday for the first time in a week or so, and the scale went down today. Feeling much better, and remembering I need to take care of MYSELF so I can take care of MY KIDS.

[Georgetown 253]

5 minutes ago, amy6152 said:

Thank you for the words of encouragement and suggestions. They really helped! I was completely back on program yesterday for the first time in a week or so, and the scale went down today. Feeling much better, and remembering I need to take care of MYSELF so I can take care of MY KIDS.

Awesome!!!! I have a friend who’s daughter also suffers from a chronic pain disorder. I hope your daughter gets the help she needs!

[Avery's Mom 315]

On ‎2‎/‎14‎/‎2019 at 1:00 PM, FluffyChix said:

I love this.