Sadness

[mousecat88 2,281]

I am 2.5 months out and still really struggling with sadness at not being the weight I expected to be. Yes yes, "what did you expect, to lose 100lbs in 3 months?" I don't know... maybe deep down inside I had hoped I would. I can't get over my impatience. I always want instantaneous results with everything. I know and knew going into this that that wouldn't be the case here. But I still end up crying and upset since I feel like I've gone through a lot of BS since surgery and I'm not happy with the results I am getting. In this particular moment, I just feel really depressed. I feel like I have such a long road before I lose another 100lbs and then so much more pain and money with all the plastics I want. And at this point I just anticipate endless complications. It just feels like a neverending road of pain and disappointment.

Sorry, feeling bleak today and just needed to get it out.

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[Kimbero 167]

Sorry your feeling down, I think its normal to want things now. But just know slow and steady wins the race. You didnt gain all the weight over night, you wont lose it over night. Have a great day

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[GradyCat 3,695]

Sorry you're feeling down. I would like quicker results too but I know it's just not humanly possible. Just know that you're doing the best you can and that you'll get the results you want within 18 months. Does that help? Hang in there.

[mousecat88 2,281]

I feel some sadness because the only person I have in my life is my mother and every complication I've had, she just says "I have nothing supportive to say because I told you so" to and from the hospital. And she told me last week she was MAD I needed my gallbladder removed, even though it started going bad years ago. She told me she is convinced it is all related and I can't tell her otherwise. I don't have anyone in my life who supported this choice, so every time something bad happens, I just feel worse.

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[Frustr8 7,886]

You deliberately rotted your GallBladder? Gosh I never guessed you had such powers, maybe I had better keep such a friend in my arsenal. I couldn't imagine her dancing around singing Serves You Right!. A bad GB is a miserable thing and she,thinks it was part of the Master Plan? Well I wonder what she is planning on you doing next?
Well I am proud of you, you have had some rotten reverses and you kept on going and basically stayed sane through it all. And a lesser woman would not have. You are Mountaineer proud, Mountainer Strong 👍and I do salute you!

[GreenTealael 25,430]

Edited January 13, 2019 by GreenTealael

[ummyasmin 1,603]

I'm sorry you're going through a rough patch. Is the depression all the time of does it come and go? You've had a tough time with your gallbladder especially so it's not surprising you are feeling blue.

Have you considered doing some cognitive behavioural therapy? It's a method that helps address the thoughts that affect your feelings and behaviours and gives you tools for how to deal with them.

*hugs* you've come through some major changes to your body and are on the track to better health!

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[mousecat88 2,281]

I'm sorry you're going through a rough patch. Is the depression all the time of does it come and go? You've had a tough time with your gallbladder especially so it's not surprising you are feeling blue.

Have you considered doing some cognitive behavioural therapy? It's a method that helps address the thoughts that affect your feelings and behaviours and gives you tools for how to deal with them.

*hugs* you've come through some major changes to your body and are on the track to better health!

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I've been to therapists on and off since I was a young child. Never for depression. It doesn't help me because I just argue OR the therapist makes me feel bad. Been to definitely over 30.


It's just sporadically since surgery. Never had depression problems prior. I just feel like sometimes I made the wrong choice and that like a lot of other weight related choices I've made, it was pointless.

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[ummyasmin 1,603]

I've been to therapists on and off since I was a young child. Never for depression. It doesn't help me because I just argue OR the therapist makes me feel bad. Been to definitely over 30.


It's just sporadically since surgery. Never had depression problems prior. I just feel like sometimes I made the wrong choice and that like a lot of other weight related choices I've made, it was pointless.

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Just a thought re: the CBT. If it's coming and going, it could be hormonal and/or you've just been through some pretty major stuff which can take some time to get your head around. Mothers, even though they love us dearly, sometimes say exactly the wrong things. But you have the BP family support even if it's electronic, we are with you in thoughts and best wishes!

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[elcee 3,341]

I'm sure you realise how illogical it is to expect that 100lb would fall off that quickly. We all want that magic where we can just wake up one morning and suddenly be slim and beautiful ( instead of fat and beautiful) but like most fairy stories it doesn't happen.

You are doing really well and you have lost heaps already. In a years time you will look back at this and think wow , how quickly did I manage to lose all that weight.

In the meantime chin up, keep smiling and know that your cheer squad here has your back

[Frustr8 7,886]

Well I figured with as much studying I had done, and all the time I had waited that my recovery was going to be picture- perfect, thought Nothing would go wrong.Surprise Surprise Surprise, I became a statistic to the things that could go wrong, didn't I? But even if my story is a thriller instead of a sunshine and roses romance, it still will be okay. Just will take a little longer to reach a victorious goal but I still believe I can. Nothing good comes without a little stress, you don't get flowers without a thunderstorm and sufficent ☔ rain.

[KimTriesRNY 1,853]

Try to focus on the now.

Worrying and fretting about something like plastics when you are not at goal may just stress you and depress you further. Most people recommend being at a stable weight for about a year before doing plastic surgery.

Is there a Bariatric support group near you that you could visit in person since you seem to have no real life support system?

[Jenwill630 119]

Armchair psychologist here.....

Do you think perhaps you feel like this, wanting faster results because it would then stop your mother from being unsupportive and unapproving?

Please find a support group to attend near you.
Please find a FB support group as well.

PLEASE post often to get support here.

[Frustr8 7,886]

You can lie down on the ground, allow people to walk all over you and they will still complain you're not flat enough. Do You,and do You well, you need to sit up for you!

[Liz The New Me 281]

What better motivation to have …...To prove her wrong!!!!!! Focus on you only! People love misery and need the company. If you are doing something about it and moving on with your life, they get nervous you don't need them anymore. Or their just jealous!!! Where in your life you can say I LOST 52 POUNDS in 2 Months. You are doing this for you. To feel better and heathy. Your gallbladder was going to go with or without this. Please stay focus on your plan. This is a no judgement and the most encouragement place to be on this site right now. Give your body a year to become the best you. Remember it took you a long time getting and being 287. Big hug and love coming your way.