4 days post op.. emotional wreck, help.

[mousecat88 2,281]

Hey all. I am 4 days post op robotic RNY... all day I've been getting super hot and then shivering. No fever though. Getting Water down a lot better than yesterday. But I keep like.. inducing panic attacks. My heart has been pounding since yesterday and i keep half-crying. I feel like a crazy person! I keep questioning if I did the right thing, and then thinking about foods like Golden Grahams and mac n cheese and wondering why I couldn't just be happy the way I was and how unjust it is that I have friends who eat total garbage and never gained a pound and that I had to have this surgery just to be healthy, etc etc. I didn't really have any health issues and did this mostly due to poor self image and maybe to prevent the unknown problems I'd have later on. Serious Buyer's Remorse keeps cycling through. I am tired of eating liquids and tired of feeling nauseous and crampy. I just want all of it to stop and for me to feel normal again. I know I will eventually feel better and not sick, once I heal up. But my head is playing tricks on me and I feel like I will feel this cruddy forever and I wonder wtf I did to myself. How do I get through this... there's no turning back and that is terrifying to me. But it's too late for that now. Like. I had to get my stomach chopped in half to stop eating junk. I feel pathetic for that. And everywhere I look there's food ads. On TV, while in the car, on social media. It's like a constant reminder of failure.

Sorry for the rant. I'm just feeling like I am on a rollercoaster of emotion. And also still, obviously, sore.

I am already down 10lbs in 5 days, which is great and all. I just feel sad I couldn't do this on my own. I feel weak. Any words of encouragement from the vets here are appreciated.

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[Jazzy1125 1,010]

16 minutes ago, mousecat88 said:

Hey all. I am 4 days post op robotic RNY... all day I've been getting super hot and then shivering. No fever though. Getting Water down a lot better than yesterday. But I keep like.. inducing panic attacks. My heart has been pounding since yesterday and i keep half-crying. I feel like a crazy person! I keep questioning if I did the right thing, and then thinking about foods like Golden Grahams and mac n cheese and wondering why I couldn't just be happy the way I was and how unjust it is that I have friends who eat total garbage and never gained a pound and that I had to have this surgery just to be healthy, etc etc. I didn't really have any health issues and did this mostly due to poor self image and maybe to prevent the unknown problems I'd have later on. Serious Buyer's Remorse keeps cycling through. I am tired of eating liquids and tired of feeling nauseous and crampy. I just want all of it to stop and for me to feel normal again. I know I will eventually feel better and not sick, once I heal up. But my head is playing tricks on me and I feel like I will feel this cruddy forever and I wonder wtf I did to myself. How do I get through this... there's no turning back and that is terrifying to me. But it's too late for that now. Like. I had to get my stomach chopped in half to stop eating junk. I feel pathetic for that. And everywhere I look there's food ads. On TV, while in the car, on social media. It's like a constant reminder of failure.

Sorry for the rant. I'm just feeling like I am on a rollercoaster of emotion. And also still, obviously, sore.

I am already down 10lbs in 5 days, which is great and all. I just feel sad I couldn't do this on my own. I feel weak. Any words of encouragement from the vets here are appreciated.

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OK.. Here comes the tough love I haven't had surgery yet, so if you are thinking you haven't done this yet so you don't know.. I will respond you are right, but i am a few days out and will be in the same seat as you by the end of the week. Think about all the reasons why you did this? The good that will come out of it in the end. Think of all the things you want to do that you don't or won't because of your size. I will give you two of my things that i will focus on after surgery for when i am feeling just like you are. 1. It sucks to have season passes to Universal and NOT fit in the seats. You know I bought season passes to Disney because they accommodate bigger people? My Goal is to renew my Universal Pass this month JUST SO i can ride EVERY RIDE in the park at the end of next year. 2. I take ballroom dancing as a hobby, more so because my son is a professional dance instructor and I got tired of him asking me to try it for 7 years. But i did, now i love it, but i REFUSE to wear one of those amazing bejeweled dresses for competitions because of my size. I went to a competition in September in Miami that my fellow students were competing in and my son was competing in, wishing i could participate. Next year! I will Participate.

My point being.. focus on the reasons that led you to decide to get this done. I too have no health issues, heck i didn't even have a PCP until i decided to do this and that is only because my EKG came back that i needed medical clearance, so i had to go find a doctor. From what i have been reading here within 2 weeks or so we will be back to normal. Think of this as a vacation from normalcy LOLOL.. Anyways, I am here to listen, and can try to help for as long as needed.

Edited November 5, 2018 by Jazzy1125
Son is a teacher not a professional dancer LOL

[mousecat88 2,281]

My surgeon's office JUST called while I was randomly bawling my eyes out. I think I briefly scared the nurse. lol. I seriously feel like I am experiencing the worst PMS of my life. That's the only way I can explain my emotions right now. She said every day it will get better, and even after week 1 there will be a marked improvement. I'm just in a crazy place right now, emotionally. And there seems to be no reasoning with it. My brain is being an a-hole. I know I did the right thing. I KNOW it. But some part of me is trying it's hardest to make me feel just awful.

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[xoxococojay 842]

You will definitely get through all of that. And i think with the right foundation you will get over the whole missing food thing too, you’ll eventually in time get to a point where you realize it’s not that serious.

Did you have to talk to a therapist during your pre-op stuff? Circle back with them and see if they can help. It’s all just mental, good luck.

[Vegasurvivor 85]

I got you, girl. I'm six months post op. Been in that same place..its not easy. Your body and mind is wigging out. You will go thru ups and downs, more changes than you will ever go through. Get a journal scribble down your crazy thoughts. Doesn't matter if you cant read it. Get it out. Pray if your at all religious. Concentrate on the positive and stay focused on yourself and you will get through it. Go to a support group if there's one in your area.
Your going to be just fine..it just takes time. It took me until four months till the waters parted and I felt human again. Please keep us posted..hang in there. Every day will get better.

My surgeon's office JUST called while I was randomly bawling my eyes out. I think I briefly scared the nurse. lol. I seriously feel like I am experiencing the worst PMS of my life. That's the only way I can explain my emotions right now. She said every day it will get better, and even after week 1 there will be a marked improvement. I'm just in a crazy place right now, emotionally. And there seems to be no reasoning with it. My brain is being an a-hole. I know I did the right thing. I KNOW it. But some part of me is trying it's hardest to make me feel just awful.

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[mousecat88 2,281]

I tried to get in with a therapist before surgery but my psychiatrist has to see me first to do a referral and she can't see me til December. Then it's like another month from there. I know once my hormones have time to regulate again I will be much better. I just need to get there.

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[catwoman7 11,215]

emotional reactions and buyer's remorse are common at first, but the vast majority of us get through that and are happy with our decision to have the surgery. Also, the first few weeks can be rough in general - you feel tired and crappy sometimes, some food doesn't sit well, etc - but that will all be behind you before you know it!

[GreenTealael 25,384]

I think you may benefit from guided meditation/deep mindful breathing.

YouTube.

[KimTriesRNY 1,853]

Directly following surgery there are a lot of feelings and emotions effected by weight loss surgery, some of these are influenced by hormones stored in fat cells.

If you were an emotional eater you may be feeling a lot of grief, frustration, and anger...even a sense of loss....a main coping mechanism has been taken away...and it can be jarring to the system.

It gets better. I had a rough few weeks. If I felt like crying, I cried. It’s a strange few weeks. You will get through it.

[Vegasurvivor 85]

Your grieving the loss of your best friend, food. If you feel crazy, believe me..I was nuttier than you. Your in the right place seeking help from others that have been through it. Just get your rest, focus on getting your Water and Protein amounts in. Best wishes to you!

My surgeon's office JUST called while I was randomly bawling my eyes out. I think I briefly scared the nurse. lol. I seriously feel like I am experiencing the worst PMS of my life. That's the only way I can explain my emotions right now. She said every day it will get better, and even after week 1 there will be a marked improvement. I'm just in a crazy place right now, emotionally. And there seems to be no reasoning with it. My brain is being an a-hole. I know I did the right thing. I KNOW it. But some part of me is trying it's hardest to make me feel just awful.

Sent from my SM-G930R4 using BariatricPal mobile app

Sent from my Z970 using Tapatalk

[Beachladee3 74]

My surgeon's office JUST called while I was randomly bawling my eyes out. I think I briefly scared the nurse. lol. I seriously feel like I am experiencing the worst PMS of my life. That's the only way I can explain my emotions right now. She said every day it will get better, and even after week 1 there will be a marked improvement. I'm just in a crazy place right now, emotionally. And there seems to be no reasoning with it. My brain is being an a-hole. I know I did the right thing. I KNOW it. But some part of me is trying it's hardest to make me feel just awful.

Sent from my SM-G930R4 using BariatricPal mobile app

I think your body is in shock and any surgery can be an emotional rollercoaster. Hang in there. Better days are coming!!![emoji322] [emoji323] [emoji307]

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[Lillymunster 49]

I’m in day 7 post op and days 3 and 4 were bad for me. My pain was crazy and nothing was palatable. I’m feeling better now, just hang in there. chicken broth with unflavored Protein Powder has helped. It feels more like real food than Protein Shakes and goes down super easy.

[Letsgetgoing2018 448]

Hey. I’m four months out and I can tell you that I can relate to the crying and buyers remorse and all of the things you are feeling. Be gentle and kind with yourself. It will get better! You will be healthier. You made the right choice. Just focus on taking each day as it comes and working your plan. Best of luck to you! We’re all here to cheer you on!