Scared about the unknown

[tahoegirl96118 43]

So, surgery date is 10/23 and the anxiety is already overwhelming me.....

I'm 59 and worried that I'm too old to have the surgery. I have autoimmune arthritis and my doctor tells me that losing weight will help with the joint pain (already sort of knew that) but also will help with the inflammation.....

Anyone else feel like they were making a mistake to have the surgery. Thought that this one last time a diet would work?

I feel like my brain is doing cartwheels......Maybe I should be in a medically induced coma until the surgery so I stop fretting about every little thing (that was a joke)

Feed back needed and appreciated....

Thanks

[Swanton_Bomb 522]

I'm getting closer and getting scared too, and getting cold feet (the Hair loss scares me to death, in particular). I just keep telling myself: You have been trying to lose and keep off this weight for over twenty years. Clearly I'm not good at this and I need help. I know the statistics say that surgery is the best tool for success. I need to do it. Good luck, whatever you decide.

[Jingle123423 165]

59 is not too old. You could easily live another 30 years (or more). Do you know what you are afraid of or is it general anxiety?

[Lynn Cannon 49]

I’m so glad you posted!! I am 59 yrs old too. Do you think we should form the “old farts club”? Tee Hee. For me, and perhaps you, having the surgery is mostly medical. I made the decision because my ips and knees hurt and I have been exhausted for so long. I have my own business which I love but between work, aged parents I was coming home exhausted and would hit the couch and just bring on the food until bed. I also have a Type 2 diabetis. When I looked at me future And weighed out the options 1) accept being overweight and all the health concerns; limited mobility, not being able to play with my grandkids (when I get them), increased risk for heart disease and Type 1 diabetes OR take charge and have this amazing tool to help me, lose the weight and really live and have so many more options open to me I knew this was my only choice and the best decision for me. It’s a more difficult recovery when we’re older but it will be worth it. I was sleeved Aug 23 and am so looking forward to the adventures around the corner. Sending you big gigantic hugs!! 🤗🤗🤗 Lynn

[CrankyMagpie 509]

Hey there, I'm also getting the surgery for autoimmune arthritis. It has better odds of clearing up my pain than any of the meds that are still available to me. If that works out--if the surgery brings my arthritis under control--then even self-pay, at ~$12k, it's a steal, compared to the price of arthritis meds (except methotrexate, that's fairly inexpensive... but also not sufficient to control the arthritis alone, and I'm allergic to a whole class of biologics).

I'm a little over two weeks out from the surgery (Oct 3), and I am having all kinds of second and third and fourth thoughts. If I'm in the unlucky percentage of people whose arthritis isn't significantly improved by the surgery, I worry I will regret having it done. (Very few people regret it, but it does happen.) This is, of course, pretty silly; even if the surgery doesn't directly improve my arthritis, weighing less will make it more bearable. Plus, there's the reduced stress from not having to live as a fat person in a society that hates fat people.

And I feel like I'm in this terrible cycle, right now, where I am too tired and too in pain to take proper care of myself -- to cook the healthy foods (standing that long in the kitchen? can't do it) and go to the gym (pain and exhaustion combine to be very demotivating) and keep my caffeine intake under control (I'm always tired) -- and the surgery and its associated weight loss really may be enough to break that cycle for me.

So I get the reluctance. But I also think weight loss surgery should be prescribed for more of us with autoimmune arthritis, based on the promising results from the studies that have been done. (And insurance should cover it. Heaven knows I'll be saving them a fortune, getting this done.)

[Jingle123423 165]

"Plus, there's the reduced stress from not having to live as a fat person in a society that hates fat people."

This is so true.

[leebick 448]

I am 62 and today is the second anniversary of my surgery. Yes, I was 60 when I had the surgery two years ago. I would do it again in a heartbeat, and wish I'd done it 10 years sooner. I am SO MUCH HEALTHIER! No, I wasn't pre-diabetic, no autoimmune issues, etc., just getting heavier and heavier every year, and watching my blood pressure become worrisome. We've all been there, tried every diet known to mankind (some several times), goaded ourselves into exercise programs, gyms, fitness routines, etc., only to continue to gain about 6-10 pounds a year. Six pounds? Not bad... until after 10 years it's 60 pounds, after 20 years it's 120 pounds. SIXTY IS NOT TOO OLD FOR THIS SURGERY!! I was anxious, I was nervous, but I kept reminding myself: Eyes on the prize!

I will tell you... no more back pain, my knees are much better, my BMI is down, my blood pressure is normal. I look in the mirror and actually smile at what I see there. How long has it been since THAT's happened? I go clothes shopping and don't hate every second, and this summer I went to the swimming pool with my daughter- in a bathing suit, in public! I feel like I am living like a "normal" person again... not someone who is always pulling and tugging on her clothes, wearing things that don't fit well, don't look good, don't make me feel good, worrying about "will I fit" in the theater seat, on the airplane, in the amusement park ride seat. I am pretty sure, even if it doesn't "cure" your arthritis issues (I know, not the correct term but you know what I mean), you will feel so much better about yourself, it'll be worth it!

I won't lie... there are things I miss, things I can't now do, but I am talking about the things that got me into the weight loss mess in the first place. I won't ever again sit down and eat unlimited amounts of food: Not gonna eat a whole pizza, not gonna load my plate with seconds at Thanksgiving (and then have multiple desserts), not gonna do a whole lot of things that I used to love. But you know what? IT'S OK. I'm still learning to live with my new anatomy, my new physiology, but I'm working with it. Here's a story, a story makes me feel happy. My daughter and I are big fans of going to Disney World, and our vacations have morphed as she's grown (she'll be 25 next week). As adults, one of our favorite pastimes on vacation (not just at Disney) is enjoying good food and drink. My daughter and I went to Disney this summer, for the first time since my surgery. I was pretty concerned, especially as one of my favorite restaurants anywhere is at Disney. It's called Boma, and it's a buffet of African-inspired dishes (along with more "americanized" options). I LOVE THEIR FOOD. Authentic African dishes, multiple hand-carved roasts, 5 Soup options, 10 salad options, and a dessert buffet that extends to the moon! Ahh... Boma... never gonna be the same again, and I knew that going in. But guess what? I had a WONDERFUL time! I was just careful. I tried 3 of the Soups (about 2T of each, enough to taste and enjoy) and had small slices of each of the meats. I had little tastes of each of my daughter's Desserts, and yes, I HAD A GLASS OF WINE. Was I well within my eating regimen? No way... I know I ate more than normal, but I wasn't stuffed, wasn't sick, and most of all, I was satisfied. It reinforced that with thinking and planning, I can STILL enjoy the aspects of a good meal, just in moderation. I was MORE than satisfied, I was EXCITED that this new "stomach" of mine isn't going to limit my enjoyment- but now I am going to limit my consumption. I felt like it was such a positive, successful evening, and I left Boma floating on air!

HAVE THE SURGERY. Do it for more than just the autoimmune benefits. Do it for the excitement of feeling good about yourself for the rest of your days! Stick to the plan, follow the rules, don't play loose and fast at the beginning. It's normal to be anxious, to worry about "what if" but here's a little secret: You already know what's going to happen IF you don't have the surgery... because it's how we all lived, all these years. Another diet, another exercise program... what's gonna happen with that. HAVE THE SURGERY. Don't look back, eyes on the prize!! YOU CAN DO THIS!!

[dreamingofasleeve 89]

I am only 28 so age doesn't necessarily cross my mind. But I tend to overthink everything. I am terrified of the unknown as well. I am scared of dehydration, Vitamin deficiencies, not hitting Protein goals. Just side effects in general. I don't have a date yet but I have been doing the 6 month pre op meetings with a dietitian like insurance requires... And I'm still so scared 🥺 I know this is what I should do but it's hard I have major medical anxiety.

Sent from my Pixel using BariatricPal mobile app

[Frustr8 7,886]

Then there is me 72, arthritic since 25, 2 knee replacements, GERD, asthma, c-pap, The happy news: on September 5 2018 at 7AM I received my RnY and I believe,myself healing well. I had absolutely no extra problems from my age, oh I am impatient. to heal faster, but there are 20-25 year olds feeling the same way as,me. It does take a while for the altered cogs to fit back into,place. But would I want to go back to before, knowing I would not,live this decade out? NEVER NEVER NEVER! The minor pain, the having to adjust to restyled ways of eating,and drinking , minor blips on life screen. pm me , talk to me on here, I'm a great so7rce of info.

[tahoegirl96118 43]

Leebick, I love your post to this topic.

You have encouraged me more than you'll ever know.....Thank you so much and thanks to all that have posted on this topic.

What I see as I scroll through the topics and reply's is that we are all the same. Most of us have the same concerns and some of us (I'm talking about me) have more than one concern.

I'm grateful to have found this site!