false SEPTEMBER 2018 SURGERIES AND SUCCESS

[Frustr8 7,886]

And today Sunday the 28th of April. I look like somebody bashed. the left side of my face, right side a skosh puffy but the left, my oh my, it does not look real healthy! But the UTI is repenting so maybe it is okay for that, must do better than Augmentin or the cephlosporins or I would have gotten prescibed something else. I just am trusting it will be better by Tuesday when I have my next appointment in Columbus. I look as though I went several rounds with Rocky Balboa and that isn't the way I want to present myself.

[shoregirl75 102]

Well group we are 9 months out this month. How is everyone doing?

I am happy with my loss but I was really hoping I would make it to goal. I've been at pretty much a stand still for the last 2 months. I lost great the first 7 months but have hit a wall and I have just been gaining and losing the same 3-5lbs for 2 months. My diet hasn't been perfect I admit but I haven't gone overboard and I am very active. Just wondered if everyone else has slowed down or starting to struggle? How is your restriction? How much is everyone eating at this point?

[Frustr8 7,886]

cyclonic says I should make there on or shortly after my anniversday date(September 5th) nearly down to Onederland,,about 210 now. Having a problem, will try to post about it later.

[Frustr8 7,886]

clinic not cyclonic although the latter could also be true. Rather an upheaval directed at ME

[Frustr8 7,886]

Well , should I tell what upset me last week? Last Wednesday I was puking repeatedly , after I had lost what little bit I had in there, I still was gagging and dry-heaving. I thought maybe something was going to turn wrong so I called my clinic, a message was taken and I was told one of the Nurse- Practioners would call me back. Well one did, and she was very nasty, said I was Munchausing, you can look it up, but basically that I was making this illness up for sympathy, that there was Absolutely nothing wrong with me and I was a waste of time for her. Whaaat? At that point even my Water was coming back up. Okay about a half-hour later she called back, said she had spoke with another nurse, they suggested I call my local Mental Health agency, I am not going wacky-woo, I am vomiting, I am not bulemic, I am not forcing anything up. Lord a Mercy, I am in pain, I do not enjoy emesis. I still am not sure if the outlet from my pouch is truly patent like I was told. These two young ladies ate not the good Nurse-Practioner Valerie that I have appointments with the times I don't see Dr Needleman. My next appointment with her is in August, because of vacations et al. These 2 poor excuses for nursing personnel I have never had ant contact with, I do not feel they had my best interests at ❤ heart. I have talked in the meantime to my PCP, who is also dumbfounded. But I am going to stay mentally strong, the next time I call OSU I will make sure it is Valerie to return my call, either her or one of the two doctors. Did the vomiting get better? Yes I finally was able to keep some sugar' free Jello down at 8'9 PM, made sure I wasn't missing a single Zofran dose, managed to get all my meds down with small sips, got some good rest and Thursday dawned much better, Saw my PCP Monday, after speaking with him before. Got some other facets of me checked out. Said my ❤ultrasound came out wonderful, I am structurally sound there just got that pesky Murmur, but it must just be my distinctiveness shining forth. So the scorecard now reads
Renal cyst and mild hematuria- Urologist not worried
❤Murmur- PCP no longer worried
Multiple Thyroid Nodules- Otolaryntologist not too worried
Bowing of Vocal Cords- speech therapist,ENT and I not too 😟 worried
The state of my pouch- having another Endoscopy on June 12th- I might be worried but Thing 1 and Thing 2, the malevolent nursies, they could care less than less. I know my Valerie there would be horrified and mortified if she only knew. And I do remember their names, if they ever cross my path , they had better have apology in their ❤of❤s. My Red-headed pride will demand it!

[Frustr8 7,886]

And that day The thought of the day
"Don't fake being okay. You only hurt yourself by doing so. If you need help , ask for it and try to keep balance in your life." Ironic, isn't it!👈😣👉

[Frustr8 7,886]

Well i have another Endoscopy scheduled- have not heard from Columbus recently- believe after the Mid-May fiasco with those 2 nurses at the clinic They now are practicing Structured Neglect. Well I have worse things I could call it but I am a lady, at least my parents raised me to be a lady. Well a couple other problems have popped up, shall we say gastrointestinally. Not the pouch but much farther downstream, my theory after the recent flare- ups maybe developing IBS or Crohns, oh I will be thrilled if I am wrong.
So on the 12th of June, coincidentally Tomkitten's birthday, age supplied on demand, my gastroenterologist,here is doing it, my PCP set itup. Am I worried? WELL just a little, I had hoped after my RNY I would be in the lap of healthn not finding and addressing these bothersome little blips. The more I lose, the more things they seem to be finding. Its like my fat was sheiding things from view! Oh down deep I suppose I'm grateful but every test seems to have a " by the way" attached. And I long to scream WHAT NEXT? I am thinking about getting a job as a Sewing Dummy, that way,they can put markers and pins wherever they desire.
And my weight is continuing to diminish, know they will weigh me at Ambulatory Surgery, last weight was 203, so it's not impossible I have jumped over into Onderland, as I have been losing still !3-5 pounds every week to 10 days. See while I was on TPN. my weight loss crawled down almost to a stall, in the month after it was removed , I dropped 30 pounds, ka-thunk, so truly my "Honeymoon Period" was merely deferred and I am still quite actively losing. Also haven't had a full Blood Test since my Iron. INFUSION in March. Oh there has been blood dra2n for other purposes but NOBODY has checked my Iron Level. PCP said in his experience Infusions might be Every 3 Months, well another thing Thing1 and Thing 2 at the clinic don't care about! I logically should be having another in June. If nobody wants it, I'll just keep and use all I have!
So my lovelies, that's how Frustr8 turns in the wind, toppling over into 18s, missed 24 completely, and haven't,been in 20-22 too long, maybe month/ month and half, but the slacks are starting to slide down and some of the tops are so loose it looks they are Maternity smocks, went through everything I still have, packed 9 boxes 18 by 18, they're left over from when,I got TPN supplies, see a lot of them were frozen for freshness, so these were Styrofoam with lids. Make nice,Mini-coolers for soda pop or beer, neither of which I drink anymore. Oh really nothing still taste good, no sweet tooth, and when I do think of something , 2 or 3 bites and I AM DONE, even my homemade Soups, maybe 1/4 cup tops , found out my,own taste better than canned. I notice,the Chunky or Progresso Light,seem to be chicken or chicken-broth based, and Guess What, I am no longer enamored of the fowl🐥anymore And his or her fruits of labor, eggs come bouncing right back up if I try to eat them. Precious Pouch,is much more picky than a monarch would be. So to keep peace my diet is morning and,pretty bland, have not cut Protein Shakes out, they often are my Breakfast or Early Day choice. Usually make powder up with 1% milk, a compromise with TK, still tastes almost identical to the 2% we used to buy. So I will update you of anything newsworthy, but right now these tests are the high light of my Bland & Dull life.

[Frustr8 7,886]

Well tomorrow before 3 pm I should know what time my procedure will be on Wednesday. And like I have boasted , this should be my 12th or 13th Endoscopy, I should know enough about them that I could do my own if necessary. Now don't laugh at me but I am a Wee bit apprehensive. Maybe it's because it's someone different, maybe because I have had so many that I attach special significance to this one. Will the result be that last chance I had to avoid further SURGERY? There have been others with a similar difficulty to me, their doctors are able to solve their problem. Yet mine seems to go on and on. Am I going to be a gastrointestinal cripple the rest of my life, is there no way to repair this?How many times have I been told " DONT COMPARE YOURSELF TO SOMEONE ELSE!" And truly I do know better but it is hard not to, I look at the Before and After submissions and I want to cry! Yeah Big Brave Frustr8 gets scared too, maybe I will never be on a "Normal" diet. Oh I don't "cheat", how could I when I have difficulties with even the good-for-me foods? If anybody wants to remember me in your prayers on Wednesday, that would be cool. And maybe I am blowing this out of proportion, after all it is just another testing, but I hope nothing bad gets found down there! No bad liver, no pancreatitis, no more ulcers,everything smooth and healthy looking inside, no more real problems! I should remember IT IS WHAT IT IS, stop sweating the. Small stuff. And trust all the doctors involved in my care. But Dang It, It Is Hard!

[Frustr8 7,886]

Well I am safely be
back home. O did find out my jejunem is patent, aka open. The ulcerations there are nearer to healed but it is very modular. I liked this gastroenterologist, will keep him in my Medical Stable for now on. And he also attempted to stretch my stoma opening, may it please stay open! Now the bad part, somehow I have pain I have never had before with any of my other endoscopy. it started about. an hour and half or 2 hours after its completion. I have had a mild sore throat before, that's why I usually ask for warm green or herbal tea , it is soothing. This time, if I had not had a procedure done I would be out in the ER demanding an cardiac workup, it hurts THAT Bad.,It's so bad, like somewhere between a 7 and 8 I wish I had Tramadol, took one of my hoarded Norco, barely took the edge off. I am not an wusd, well really I don't complain much, usually suck,it up and survive. Told Tomkitten to watch over me whIle I try to sleep tonight. Discharge papers said because of the sedation not to take pain pills, Bull Feathers- I am miserable. Makes me wonder what he did differently, feel like he used a rubber mallet to hammer it down my throat! If I die at this point, No Big Deal, hate to call Emergency Squad and say I've got a sore chest, Lord knows I have been checked for Cardiac before, except for my slight murmer and that pesky Aortic Aneurysm,in my thorax, my cardiac history is pretty smooth . Had scans, caths and except for the aforementioned the only thing remarkable is I have absolutely no arterial plaque,Oh they expected me to but my cardiologist examined all my vessel plumbing and couldn't find one piece . Said for me only thing would be vessel spasms nothing else to do me in, and that was within the last 120 days,,and I keep losing weight so less and less obesity stress there . IDK but this is going to need checked out, PCP will be called in the AM, after that call the gastroenterologist , ask him what he DID,to me, get a hold of cardiologist, go haunt them at ER until,i get some answers? I just know I will not be waiting until Friday or Saturday, even if someone tells me to give it 48 hours to get better! This is a new unexpected pain and I DONT LIKE IT ONE BIT! Like every other American, I have little patience, I want my problems solved NOW!

[Frustr8 7,886]

Not modular -Nodules like lumpy, significant? Who knows, maybe just scarring.

[Frustr8 7,886]

And today I am not having a Good Day, either stomach flu, Constipation trying to set in, colic or diverticulitis. And not that is enough, I have gently puked 3 times and it is approximately 2 in the afternoon.
When I was seeking my RNY, I promised Dr Needleman, my surgeon , if he would only perform my surgery I would never. verbalize any regrets. And that is something I never have done, for I have given him my word.
But today while I have been in pain, be it only lower left abdominal, I have had to time to reflect.
I went from Obesity, even though it had its implicit dangers, but my body was in a Happy state of homoestasis, and my health was as good as possible with arthritis pain and inability to do many tasks.
Now I am thinner, true, but I vomit frequently, which I had not had not a frequency of since pregnancy many many years ago. My youngest is now 40. And I do not feel good, perhaps I would say I have gone from excellent to merely pretty good health. I felt as the months went by I would feel better and better. 9 months plus and I do not see improvements that much. I just had another endoscopy, I am assured my jejunem and proximal ileum are quite patent, so is my problem perpetually going to be that lump of stomach pouch, the Ms Precious Pouch? Nobody definitely can tell me whether she has peristalsis to move food along, whether her enervation, partially compromised by Dr Needleman's Magic Stapler has rejoined its servered nerve fibers, I am assuming perhaps that anastomosis is also patent, nobody made a note of that on my paperwork, or is what I suspected is true, she drains only by gravity, basically hanging inert with only enough gastric secretions to eat ulcers but not enough to help digest foodstuffs?
See I need a tutorial on a 201 or 301 level, not the Freshman 101 level " by and by you'll heal and be All Better!" been there , heard that, and it is NOT RESPONSIVE to my problems!
Do I want

[Frustr8 7,886]

more surgeries and a reversal? No, I doubt it would take a total near-death state for it to be considered. I would not be able to complain if I truly was a month or 2 from death., would I? And I do not want to revert to my gross obesity, I like the loss of weight on the surface, what I dislike is the daily or more than daily foods repudiation by my pouch , the fear that I am malnourished or close to it, having my fears not acknowledged, if one more person says my color is good, my body looks nice or that they are SO PROUD of me, I am going to Scream" Listen to Me , There is SOMETHING not quite RIGHT" at that point I will have a Red-G3aded Stomping Tantrum, been years since I threw one, but I think I still remember how! 😲👿😦

[Frustr8 7,886]

Well I started to update you guys the next chapter of the Frustr8 Follies and this fool smartphone dropped everything! I am about ready to heave it over on the couch, we are not having a happy time together. And my Beautiful Post is out floating in the Ether somewhere! I was going to tell you, gastroenterologist fou,d my small bowel is patent (Medicalese for open) but failed to mention number and degree unhealed ulcerations in my stomach and jejunem, and width of my stoma opening. Still having emesis bouts, he may have gotten through that day with his magic endoscope but will it stay open? Doubt it!
Tomorrow I visit my opthamologist, hopefully my left cataract is not ready and there is another explanation for blurrier vision,like (shudder )OLD AGE. On Wednesday it's PCP and orthopaedic surgeon, something is wacky with my right hip. Pain, hardly able to walk with it, really limping, took in office X rays, no obvious deformity, doubts it's arthritic degeneration, his theory,is Stress Fracture of the hip, sent me for a MRI last Monday, then the next week I consult with the dermotologist, I have dark pigment blotches on my cheek area, really had them since I was carrying,Tomkitten, but as I lose weight they seem to have become more noticeable n people have been asking if someone,abused and bruised me. Then on Thursday Tomkitten and I both have sleep apnea evaluations so we'll see how That plays out.
Heard from Roy, my dietician at OSU, wanted to know why they hadn't heard from ME, so I explained it all to him and told of my May fiasco which He Apologized that I was treated badly. And now I'll finish my take maybe tomorrow, I have more to tell, some NSV,and nicer things. See you on the flip side.

[Frustr8 7,886]

Well more update,turns out I do NOT have a fracture either normal or stress produced, I have trochanter bursitis, mycenter of balance changing put. extra stress there? I will probably have my left cataract removed within a few weeks, Dr Koehler says I could wait up to a year but it will only get more cloudy, my visual discernment will only get worse, already have a yellow tinge to every thing, double vision and printing leaning to the left, so why postpone things? Hey I'm getting cuter and somewhat younger in appearance, want to see Good- looking Men if they happen My Way, don't want snuck,up on cause I couldn't see clearly! Yesterday when I was at Doctor Appointment # 3 I received a call from Valerie, Dr Needlemans Right-hand CNA - nurse person. So today when things settle down I'll return her call! This morning , Chico from Lincare came , recalibrated and adjusted my C-Pap, we tried it out and Mr Smiley Face emoji showed up, changed out my mask/ nasal pillows size as I am not as BIG a girl as once I was. I believe I will be able to wear it tonight instead of removing it in my sleep! Yippee Skippee Yahoo! I do concede I sleep better, no nightmares when I wear it. Maybe they had to do with insufficent oxygenation? Now I have next the Dermotologist about the brown discoloration/ mask left on my cheeks that strangers are accusing me of being an abuse victim and trying to hide it! Yeah I live in a strangely suspicious town, don't I? One lady pressed into my hand a business card for New Directions, our local Battered Woman Shelter, when I protested. that I really didn't need it, she said "Just Keep it, We All will need it Someday!" Last person who tried that is securely DEAD, and no, he died willfully on his own. Thought he knew more than his doctors, turned out he was wrong and it was Fatal in the long run.
Then Both Tomkitten and I have Overnight Sleep Eval/Studies to be run . His to establish need, mine to ascertain my residual degree because I will probably be one of the minority Bariatric surgery did not cure, since it is STRONG Heredity in my family Tree. NBD, I'm strong, I can handle it, surmount it for my best benefit, and it would give TK a strong Co- morb to go with his 2 secondary and onward toward WLS for himself. < 40 BMI ---be danged ! He's well over 35 so we will see how things do progress! Still need complete Blood Labs before MY Next Clinic visit. Other-wise my PCP says I am in Wonderful Shape for the Shape I am in, still think he feels I will either implode or explode one of these days! And I am securely below 200 and I SHALL NEVER RETURN THERE AGAIN✋!😛👊!

[Frustr8 7,886]

And yes they called from Opthamologist to schedule my LEFT cataract removal, would you believe October 3rd? They truly are booking out THAT FAR, still have to meet with Dr K on September 11th, thought they did enough last Tuesday including pictures of my interior eye to satisfy a herd of physicians. and Funny I don't remember his partner Dr Reeder having THAT done before I had the Right Cataract removed in December 2016? Maybe different doctor, different Bells and Whistles? Well, a Big Fat Whatever, not sweating such a trivial small thing! And at the very least I have 3 appointmentst each remaining month of 2019. About time for Medicare to draft me a letter telling ME Please stay home, We Can't Keep up with YOU as it is! LOL👈😄👉, for such a long time after I,turned 65 and old enough for it, I stayed home and didn't cost them MUCH. Oooh Baby things have changed around now!