Oceanlove 98 Posted June 8, 2018 (edited) Okay so here is the entire story here. I have posted in bits and pieces in replies to others. So I started my pre diet liquid only mind you. At three weeks prior to my June 13th surgery date. I have NASH or severe fatty liver or whatever they are calling it now a days 5/24th I started it. I did really good I was doing my Liquid Protein and broth, sf Jello and popsicles and a cup of yogurt. Then on the 30th and 31st I fell off it because I had found out I couldn’t have broth nor yogurt. The surgeons office said the sodium in broth would not release the fat around the liver. And the yogurt was too much milk products since I’m using premier shakes. So that sat me back and it was a lot to lose I tried it and was so hungry I gave in and had a blue cheese burger at a restaurant on the 30th. Then my coworkers brought in my favorite pizza they thought it had not started yet so I had like 4 slices and doughnuts(2) a couple hours later. On June 1st I started again this time no broth or yogurt and it’s much harder. I made it through Friday, Saturday and Sunday then failed as the following this week starting on Monday Monday- 2 fried burgers with tons of cheese and on bread. Tuesday- large movie popcorn and butter Wednesday- small cheeseburger and beef with veggies Thursday- beef with veggies and chicken with veggies and cheese My dear hubby is freaking out about it and has me worried that I’m going to get to surgery and they will cancel it or open me up and cancel it. I started it at the weight of 311 or 314 and I’m now at 291 so I have lost some weight. So im just curious if I can follow the all liquid till surgery if I stand a chance of it happening any thoughts? Has anyone ever failed this badly this close and made it? or has anyone had surgery they went in and closed without doing it? Because they cheated. I know I did it to myself and well I own that fully. I couldn’t control my actions I will have to work on that a lot. But I’m torn as to if I should just call the surgeon office and tell them to cancel it because my liver is most likely not shrunken enough. If I do that I know he’s heading out a week after the 13th for three weeks and my insurance only approved the surgery window up till July 3rd or just be strict till the 13th and hope all is well. As well as doing a murelax bowel cleanse the day before. Oh how I wish I could have been stronger and not cheated Edited June 8, 2018 by Oceanlove 3 eaglesoar, Matt Z and kjuno reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pearldrop 164 Posted June 8, 2018 Ok, take a deep breathe and forgive yourself as you would a friend. I think, regardless of when you have the surgery, you need to talk with a therapist to work through some of your triggers for post/long term success. Start your fluids and Protein and steer clear of your triggers. This phase is super hard, I’m so glad mine is over, I struggled really badly. cheese was my weakness. 4 Frustr8, JamesGator, DaleCruse and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frustr8 7,886 Posted June 8, 2018 Hey Darlin' you're human, you made a mistake. Like Pearldrop says forgive yourself, stop that that sidewise slither and get back on track. Your story came at a good time for me, son had pizza tonight, I just gave in instead of going in the other room while he chowed down. Just had a little cheese and sausage , no crust, no multiple pieces, now I'm posting on BP because I can sleep and had to take Tums for the sad tummy. That stuff was too spicy rich for Mr" Give me a Protein Shake instead" tummy and it's chanting :Serves you right Serves you right". Come morning I'm back on the straight and narrow and have learned my lesson. Curious my grandfather and late hubby's grandfather, his in Dutch, mine in English. The Saying "Them don't listen- They Got to Feel" Your sadder and maybe wiser friend Frustr8😭 1 Taoz reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
annanay1 14 Posted June 8, 2018 I just had my surgery yesterday morning. I was supposed to eat low carb Atkins style for one week prior to surgery and a full liquid diet the day before surgery. Well that didn’t happen lol😬I ate pretty much everything in smaller portions and only liquids for a day and a half instead of one day before. Surgery was a success and I am positive yours will be as well! Good luck! 3 jhrnhab, GirlShrinking and Dmantei56 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sprinkles1 358 Posted June 8, 2018 If I had to choose between 1. Them opening me up and they may or may not be able to do the surgery or 2. Having to reschedule but unsure if my insurance would cover it... I'd choose option 1. Stick to liquids and keep pushing forward!Sent from my SM-G955U using BariatricPal mobile app Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shortmocha 39 Posted June 8, 2018 Like everyone's said... what's done is done. Time to move on. You seem to have an all or nothing thing happening. Either you're on the diet or you're way way off. If you can, maybe figure out ahead of time some acceptable cheats that will get you over the hump. I'm not advocating cheating, but if it's gonna happen then let's try not to undo all your good work. You seem to have a fondness for cheeseburgers (so do I LOL), let's definitely leave off the bread. Protein is good... carbs not so much. An even better step in the right direction is just a piece of chicken breast. When you're on a liquid diet sometimes it's the act of chewing that you need or just a little something heavier in your stomach. You can get that without going overboard. Maybe plan ahead... you're on the liquid diet, but if you hit the wall what are a couple of reasonable things you will allow yourself. 3 eaglesoar, Dmantei56 and Gundy reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Matt Z 4,139 Posted June 8, 2018 Yes people have had their surgeries cancelled for not following the diet. Most don't, but you've stated you've got a fatty liver that needs to be shrunk. If they get in there and the liver is too big or in the way... they will close you up and not continue the surgery. The bigger issue is (and I'm sorry if this comes off as callous, but it's a reason why we all have to do psych evals before hand because not being able to control what we eat past surgery can cause *MAJOR* complications), what's going to happen after your surgery? Yes the pre-op is hard. But post op is just as hard for a while too. Why do you want the surgery? Don't answer here, but you need to ask yourself this. When you feel like cheating, you need to ask yourself what's more important, that piece of pizza, or your life. Honestly, only you have to answer to you and your actions. But it doesn't seem like you are taking stock of how important this change is... that's a lot of food, that's not "cheating".... cheating is "oh I had a bite of something" not, "I haven't been following the diet for a week+". Sorry for being blunt, but, what you posted here is a major problem, and you **NEED** to come clean with your surgeon, surgical staff, nutritionist and psych. Odds are post bypass there are going to be plenty of things you can't eat... what are you going to do then? None of your choices were even smart "cheats"... pre-op is when you need to start figuring out the better choices to make, Yes we are all human and we all make mistakes, but how many mistakes does it take to realize you need to stop? Normal stomachs can take over 15 mins to realize you've eaten, pounding half a pizza and then 2 donuts 2 hours later... IS.NOT.HUNGER. That's compulsion / addiction / "head hunger". You should be nervous. These actions are major red flags. You need to make the hard choices for yourself and your health. No one else is going to do it for you. Even post surgery, it's not going to be some magic wand that gets waved and you never get real or "head" hungry. Doesn't happen. Cravings are still going to happen. Desire to eat that pizza is still going to happen. But ***YOU*** need to say "no". YOU need to decide to eat something better. YOU need to decide that you don't want to be fat anymore and only YOU can decide that you want to live. So here's what you do. Stop. All of it. Stop all of the excuses. Stop all of the disappointment in yourself. Stop giving in. Stop giving up. Stop caving in. Now, today. Start following that diet to the letter. Start making better choices. Start exercising. Start getting in 64-128oz of waver. Start realizing that food does not control you. Start realizing that if you don't change, your health is not going to improve. Start changing into a better you. Each day, you should look in the mirror before bed and be honest with yourself. Did you do what you were supposed to? Did you do the right thing? You **CAN** do this. You just have to MAKE yourself do this. Stay Strong. 25 6 Wanda247, Matt Z, exbingeingbabe and 28 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Orchids&Dragons 9,047 Posted June 8, 2018 I'm going to be the really mean one here. Don't try to force the surgery just because of the insurance window. They approved you once, they'll approve you again. It sounds like you're not sufficiently prepared for the surgery. This process is only 20% stomach, 80% HEAD! Your head isn't in the game yet. One slip-up is a cheat. One week of binging is self-sabotage. You're looking for an excuse to cancel because you're afraid. If you've read these boards, you've seen people who have totally wasted the opportunity provided by their surgery with self-defeating behavior. You need to spend the time to get your priorities set, imo. Because after the surgery you will have cravings, you will want comfort foods, you will want to gnaw off your own fingers sometimes with hunger. And you may very well resent others being able to indulge. Don't think that because binging will cause you to throw up right after surgery that you are "cured". There are many ways of "eating around" restrictions and you will have to be constantly on your guard. Please understand that I'm not trying to be hateful. I want you to succeed. But right now, I think you need to spend time with a therapist, not a surgeon. Good luck to you, whatever you decide. 17 StephanieinMI, eaglesoar, Matt Z and 14 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Syntax_Attack 76 Posted June 8, 2018 I am going to be blunt and say that the picture you paint here is someone without the self-control to be successful long term. If you get the surgery I have no doubt you will lose weight for the first few months, maybe even the first year. But after that I cannot see you staying successful. The types and amount of food you were eating were not just out of hunger, this was out of desire and habit. If you had given into hunger and eaten something even half-way healthy my assessment might be different. My aunt also had this surgery and has regained all of her weight and then some because of these behaviors. She lost a lot of weight in the first year and then chose to snack throughout the day on very unhealthy items. 3 years later she has paid the price for this and has had an ulcer due to the combination of the surgery and not following the doctors advice. 8 hours ago, Oceanlove said: I couldn’t control my actions I will have to work on that a lot. This is a major problem and one you have to fix BEFORE surgery. After the surgery you will be able to in short order eat things you should not. I was sleeved less than 3 weeks ago and I have no doubt whatsoever that if I chose to I could eat some french fries and they would stay down just fine. Not only have I had the very strong craving for them but I have had people eat them right in front of me in the lunch room at work, and I know full well a 2 minute drive is all it would take for me to run down and get my own. My morning fast food meal would almost always include a McDonalds hash brown and I still crave them every single morning, especially when I have to drive past it every single day. Self-control and discipline is the only thing standing between success and failure all of us and it will be the same with you. You will be exposed to all of your favorite foods on a nearly daily basis and you will crave them, and you will be physically able to eat them much sooner than you think. I personally think you need to work on your self-control with a professional before you get this surgery, otherwise I fear that you will end up in worse shape in the long run. Good luck. 10 Boujee_Susie, Frustr8, sleevedinschool and 7 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Oceanlove 98 Posted June 8, 2018 I appreciate everyone being frank and although tough to hear I admit but needed. 9 Wanda247, StephanieinMI, Syntax_Attack and 6 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
moondoggie1983 202 Posted June 8, 2018 Unfortunately, I agree with the majority of the posts. Did you have to do any psych exams pre surgery? If not, you should start. Honestly, I would call your surgeon and tell them all of this. If you watch videos of WLS you’ll see how important it is to shrink a normal sized liver, and you stated you have a very fatty liver. It’s better to be honest and have it rescheduled to when you’re ready than have them go in and close up because they couldn’t do it. I also think you might be looking for a reason to cancel. Whether intentional or not. What you described is not cheating, its binging. You don’t eat a half a pizza and then are legitimately hungry for donuts 2 hours later. That’s all in your head. I had my VSG May 10 and I’m still only able to have some soft foods. How are you going to handle a possible month or more not being to eat anything you listed in your post? You can hurt yourself if you do. It’s sad to say, but a whole bunch of people are unsuccessful after WLS. Now, I’m not a part of the “never have this ever again!” group, but there is the basic fact that there are foods with nutritional value, and those without. Will I have a burger later on? Maybe. Right now, red meat makes me sick and I’ve accepted that I might not ever be able to eat it again. Will I ever have a donut? Maybe I’ll have a small piece of my dad gets one, but not a whole one. If my family orders a pizza, I’ll probably have some cheese since it has Protein. Or if I want one, I’ll make one with cauliflower crust. Just be aware, you can’t eat like this. You get full. And you do get jealous seeing people around you eating things you can’t have. The good news is that if your insurance approved you, they’ll do it again. But if I were you, I’d start seeing a psychiatrist who specializes in WLS patients NOW. Personally I saw one 5 times before surgery even though I only had to go 3 times. And that’s on top of seeing my regular psychiatrist every 45 days. Call you doctor, tell them about your binging, ask for a referral to a psychiatrist and start again. That’s the best advice I can give you. Sorry if this sounds mean, but it’s just what I’d do if I were in your situation. You don’t want to do something life changing (you’ll never get your old stomach back, even if you do stretch it) and at this rate, you’ve already set yourself up for failure in the future (IMO). 5 Syntax_Attack, Pearldrop, Wanda247 and 2 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Oceanlove 98 Posted June 8, 2018 (edited) I did have a psych. done and testing. I had the pizza and doughnuts and burger on the 30th & 31st. Mostly as the last meal type thing. Because I knew the real diet started the next day. I wouldn’t be able to eat that stuff again. And most certainly not more than a bite or two if I ever could handle it. The doughnuts I had to go back and look I kept a food diary. I had the pizza at 8pm the doughnuts I had was at 1am we were heading home late from work. Also the beef and veggies were together it was less than 2oz of meat and a 1 cup sautéed veggies in olive oil same with the chicken and veggies Not that it changes a lot but thought I should clarify a couple things. Edited June 8, 2018 by Oceanlove Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Apple203 1,314 Posted June 8, 2018 (edited) The reality is, you WILL be able to eat all of the bad stuff after about a month or so. Not sure I agree that burgers are bad, but with a roll and sugary ketchup, yea, they are. What are you going to do then? I ask because its hard, and you need a plan. Edited June 8, 2018 by Apple203 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Orchids&Dragons 9,047 Posted June 8, 2018 2 hours ago, Oceanlove said: I did have a psych. done and testing. I had the pizza and doughnuts and burger on the 30th & 31st. Mostly as the last meal type thing. Because I knew the real diet started the next day. I wouldn’t be able to eat that stuff again. And most certainly not more than a bite or two if I ever could handle it. The doughnuts I had to go back and look I kept a food diary. I had the pizza at 8pm the doughnuts I had was at 1am we were heading home late from work. Also the beef and veggies were together it was less than 2oz of meat and a 1 cup sautéed veggies in olive oil same with the chicken and veggies Not that it changes a lot but thought I should clarify a couple things. Ocean, this did help to clarify the extent of your cheating and some of your choices weren't as bad as they looked initially. However, it also highlights the fact that time after time, you elected to not follow the surgeon's diet plan. Once or twice, maybe. This many times shows you have some major issues that need to be addressed. You sure don't want to damage your pouch because of being non-compliant. 1 moondoggie1983 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TakingABreak 2,733 Posted June 8, 2018 I'm curious, @Oceanlove did your insurance require supervised diet before? It sounds like you are really struggling and haven't made changes for the better prior to the pre op diet. I had given up all fast food, sweets, junk, soda, caffeine---months before my surgery. I knew if I didn't that I wouldn't comply just because it was 10 days before surgery and it was "time". I might start another topic on this very subject, because it's interesting. People who have to undergo supervised diets ahead of surgery seem to be more successful AND have a less difficult time with pre op diets. 5 Lioness815, kjuno, Wanda247 and 2 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites