Total Loss Of Sexual Desire

[MichaelG1969 4]

I am a little over 4 years post-op Had the RNY. Was 600 pounds now about 205. Surgery was great and everything has been a lot better since except my sex drive. I have been married for 22 years and our sex life has always been great. But ever since surgery I have had a total lack of interest in sex. It concerns both my wife and I. We went from 4-5 times a week before surgery (yes even when I weighed that much) to now maybe 1-2 times a month. Wife is a willing partner anytime but I am NEVER in the mood anymore. Anyone else experienced this? I know it will decrease with age but I am 48 and she is 43 so it shouldn’t be gone in me just yet.

PS Just has testosterone tested and it was in normal range...

Edited May 31, 2018 by MichaelG1969

[Charlie75 82]

Some hormones are stored in fat and just the quick change in can effort hormone levels. Maybe check with your MD about it. Maybe once your hormone levels stabilize your sex drive to return. Good luck!

Highest Wt: 265/Surgery Wt: 255/ Current Wt: 135

[Losingit2018 1,170]

Have you considered talking to your Dr about this? I wonder if it could be due to a medication that you take? I know that many hormonal things come into play for women after WLS so, maybe the same is true for men. Low testosterone possibly?

Really would be a good idea to talk to your Dr. I bet that the Dr has seen this type of thing and would have a better answer of what may be going on.

Good luck and please keep us posted on what you find. Never know when the info could help another person out.

[MichaelG1969 4]

On 5/30/2018 at 9:39 PM, MichaelG1969 said:

I am a little over 4 years post-op Had the RNY. Was 600 pounds now about 205. Surgery was great and everything has been a lot better since except my sex drive. I have been married for 22 years and our sex life has always been great. But ever since surgery I have had a total lack of interest in sex. It concerns both my wife and I. We went from 4-5 times a week before surgery (yes even when I weighed that much) to now maybe 1-2 times a month. Wife is a willing partner anytime but I am NEVER in the mood anymore. Anyone else experienced this? I know it will decrease with age but I am 48 and she is 43 so it shouldn’t be gone in me just yet.

PS Just has testosterone tested and it was in normal range...

My surgery was over 4 years ago if they have not leveled off by now I am in trouble...lol

Edited June 2, 2018 by MichaelG1969

[Numbheart 108]

Does your wife question you about it? How does she feel?

[TakingABreak 2,733]

It may not be surgery related. I know it’s common to have lack of a sexual desire for moments in time. How long would you say it’s been going on?

[MichaelG1969 4]

42 minutes ago, AshAsh1 said:

It may not be surgery related. I know it’s common to have lack of a sexual desire for moments in time. How long would you say it’s been going on?

My wife swears it started right after my surgery so that would be 4 years now

Edited June 12, 2018 by MichaelG1969

[MichaelG1969 4]

2 hours ago, Numbheart said:

Does your wife question you about it? How does she feel?

Not really question me just more concerned that it is all her and a lack of interest in her which can’t be farther from the truth. We have been married 23 years and I love her more everyday. I try to tell her that it has nothing to do with her but she still feels it does.

[TakingABreak 2,733]

On 06/11/2018 at 20:57, MichaelG1969 said:

My wife swears it started right after my surgery so that would be 4 years now

There is a lot of things you can do to fix the situation. There are couples therapist that specialize in sex therapy. Also, there are programs and books you can follow to refocus and give you ideas to rekindle the flame. I know it seems silly to go buy a book, but I’ve seen it work. Everyone associates sex as more of a mental thing for women, but it can be for a man as well.