judgemental people......

[WASaBubbleButt 41]

I have to take my original comment back. Other than my sis going around my home town telling everyone I went to a filthy hospital in Mexico and my prognosis is not good (I hear I am dying), I haven't really had any negative comments of significance.

BTW, my skanky sister who is telling everyone I went to high school with that I'm dying, she'd like the contact info for the filthy Mexican hospital for her own band.

Go figure.

[candy8360 0]

that is SO funny.

[make33 2]

The girls in my office who were so dead set against me having surgery, ("You just didn't find the right diet for your metabolism!") were very supportive when I returned to work and I love them for it. However, now they have turned into the food police ("You CAN'T have pizza"!)--so this too will have to pass!!

Friends I saw over Thanksgiving gave me "the look" and said so seriously, "How ARE you????" I have no clue what they expected me to say....How about "I feel more fantastic than I have in forty years!!!"

Sometimes it just takes time for everyone to see the results, realize you DIDN'T die and AREN'T dying, and seeing that this wonderful tool helps us with our portion control!

[coolcrystal 1]

After I told my parents I was pursueing this surgery my dad probably would have driven me to the surgery himself and paid for it right then if he'd had the money!

Both of my parents are 60 and two of the most physically fit people you'd ever meet. They work out 3-4 hours daily, eat right and are both in the best shape of their lives and for them to have an obese daughter... well, lets just say, I think it's rather embarassing for them. When I was younger and lived with them I too was 125 and physically fit, but for the last... oh 8 years or so, I've been over 195 pounds and now I'm almost 300. So, when I told them I was trying to get this, my dad sent me this email:

<TT>Hi Hon,<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></TT></PRE>

<TT><o:p> </o:p></TT><TT>I'm glad you brought this up for discussion. I think anything</TT></PRE>

<TT> you can d</TT><TT>o for </TT>weight loss<TT> will be good and we will support </TT></PRE>

<TT> your decision to have t</TT><TT>he procedure. Most importantly, I'm </TT></PRE>

<TT> glad that you acknowledge the problem a</TT><TT>nd are willing to do </TT></PRE>

<TT> something. This procedure you are considering is not the </TT></PRE>

<TT>"be all, end all" for weight. It can solve some of the weight </TT></PRE>

<TT>issues but it can be dangerous and you can end up back in the </TT></PRE>

<TT>same place if you don't take the opportunity the </TT><TT>procedure </TT></PRE>

<TT>gives you to change your life, and changing your life is what </TT></PRE>

<TT>it will do.<o:p></o:p></TT></PRE>

<TT><o:p> </o:p></TT><TT>The lap band will change your lifestyle for the better and I </TT></PRE>

<TT> am thrilled that you are willing to take it on. Me and your</TT></PRE>

<TT> mother have talked several times about approaching you about </TT></PRE>

<TT> the weight problem, getting you on weight watchers or </TT></PRE>

<TT> something, but were afraid to talk with you about it because </TT></PRE>

<TT> you always seemed defensive a</TT><TT>bout the subject. We really </TT></PRE>

<TT> don't care how you approach it, I'm thrilled a</TT><TT>nd I'm sure </TT></PRE>

<TT> she will be just as excited as I am.<o:p></o:p></TT></PRE>

[candy8360 0]

what a wonderful family you have, coolcrystal!

[cookielover 1]

I can write a book on non-supportive relationships, and the band, so I had to give this a lot of thought. Do I tell people? YES Was it a mistake to tell people? NO Should I continue to tell people? YES. I am still mourning the lost of someone I care about, but if she wasn't going to be here for the long haul then it was better she cut bait. I need only supportive people in my life. Does that mean I tell EVERYONE? No of course not, but if you are close to me, or if we are going to be hanging out day after day I am going to tell you. I don't need everyone to support my decision or even agree with me, but I do need to follow my path, and people need to understand that.

[coolcrystal 1]

Thank you Candy!

They are very supportive about this procedure, but they were/are not supportive about me being obese. I know they didn't mean to, but sometimes they would look at me with disgust and embarassed to tell people I was their daughter because I was obese. Oddly, I was still confident about my looks and thought I looked sexy until I got about 260. After that is when I lost some confidence because my rear end would have a mind of its own. LOL. and knock stuff off counters and desks and such.. and the getting stuck in chairs thing.. very embarrassing.

Anyway, everytime I'd see my mom she would make little comments about dieting and this "new recipe in her diet book". It was so annoying. At dinner they would watch every bite I put into my mouth.

So, they are supportive now, but it would have been nice if they would have been that way before. They could never understand how I could be happy and social over 200, but I was. They expect anybody that is even slightly overweight to be miserable or something.

[candy8360 0]

too coolcrystal, I just could never see my father sending me ANY kind of communication saying he would support me in anything. although he gives his verbal support, (and verbal instructions as to what I could do better and different!). I too felt like I was sexy even at an overweight stage, but now it's getting TOO far. Inside there is a skinny teenager waiting to be loosed!!!

[coolcrystal 1]

I think my dad has become more sentimental in his older age or something, because 10 years ago he never would have written that either. I think he was just so dang happy I'm giong through with it soon.

Your profile says you are 230 something.. OOh, I looked so awesome at that weight! I met my hubby at 240 and I walked right up to him with the most confidence you've ever seen and we haven't had a day apart since. He said he didn't see my weight cuz I was confident.

But at 295 its so dang painful now. Just walking up stairs I can feel the tendons in my knees straining and pulling and hurting... chairs hurt.. sleeping hurts... I know I complain about this a lot, but I still have one more dr. appointment left in December...

[candy8360 0]

I started feeling a lot of pain trying to sleep at night, and my knees bother me. I've also started getting shortness of breath. I have had men tell me that I'm hot, but for some reason I have a hard time keeping a relationship with anyone, so my weight HAS to be somewhat of a factor. But, I'm just not happy with myself. I broke it off with the guy I was seeing and haven't even tried to date again. Right now I want to focus on this surgery and getting me to where I want to be.