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Just now, redhead_che said:

A lot of things change--the way the person that had surgery feels about themselves, like self-confidence changes, attitude changes, motivations change, habits change etc. And when you've been with a partner that is used to the old habits, the old moods, attitudes, etc--sometimes it's a change that cannot be overcome. In my case, my surgery was one of the least of our problems, but it was one. I know one person that also had a relationship end just because she had confidence after the surgery and he couldn't handle it! He liked the depressed version of her apparently?

Although my relationship isn't struggling, we've both noticed a change and have had to embrace the differences. I hope you are doing OK and it will only make you stronger. :778_heartbeat:

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23 hours ago, AshAsh1 said:

Although my relationship isn't struggling, we've both noticed a change and have had to embrace the differences. I hope you are doing OK and it will only make you stronger. :778_heartbeat:

I can certainly relate to some of that myself... between the surgery and starting hormone replacement therapy very close to the same time, there was a little bit of tension in my house. My wife was terrified that I would gain more confidence with the weight loss and want to find somebody else; while simultaneously fearing that as I begin the gender transition, that I would decide I wanted to be with a man (even though she knows that gender and sexual preference are two different things). She still struggles a little, but I do everything I can to make sure she realizes that she's the only person I have eyes for.

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9 minutes ago, Czuck1983 said:

I can certainly relate to some of that myself... between the surgery and starting hormone replacement therapy very close to the same time, there was a little bit of tension in my house. My wife was terrified that I would gain more confidence with the weight loss and want to find somebody else; while simultaneously fearing that as I begin the gender transition, that I would decide I wanted to be with a man (even though she knows that gender and sexual preference are two different things). She still struggles a little, but I do everything I can to make sure she realizes that she's the only person I have eyes for.

Wow, that's a lot of transitions to process all at once. Best of luck on your journey.

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8 minutes ago, Orchids&Dragons said:

Wow, that's a lot of transitions to process all at once. Best of luck on your journey.

Thank you. It's all been a long time coming. I ignored and hid that other side of me for way too long.

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18 hours ago, Czuck1983 said:

I can certainly relate to some of that myself... between the surgery and starting hormone replacement therapy very close to the same time, there was a little bit of tension in my house. My wife was terrified that I would gain more confidence with the weight loss and want to find somebody else; while simultaneously fearing that as I begin the gender transition, that I would decide I wanted to be with a man (even though she knows that gender and sexual preference are two different things). She still struggles a little, but I do everything I can to make sure she realizes that she's the only person I have eyes for.

Its easy to forget that our loved ones go through the same journey that we do. Its hard enough to support ourselves but then to remember to support them as well. For her, this is unchartered territory and the unknown could be frightening. But I think you guys will both come out better than you were before. Best of luck love!

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