I hate it when people post just to post.....

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,282]

I am posting just to say my life is really bad right now. I just need to vent. I don't want to talk to anyone I just want to scream.

You know when something that is about to happen is right but it feels wrong and hurts like hell. Ya that. I don't want to be the one who got dumped. :thumbdown:

(((((((((((BRANDY))))))))))

Scream away sister.

[Boo Boo Kitty 3]

He fucking left without even telling his kids goodbye. My 9 year old won't even come near me after she told me she feels dead inside. No matter what anyone says I can not fucking do this. I can't. There is no way for me to do this.

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,282]

Brandy,

Nothing I say will make the pain go away. I just want you to know you're in my thoughts.. you and your children.

:thumbdown:

[*susan* 1,709]

Brandy, girl, I went through that in 1999 with my ex. I feel your pain and know how difficult it is. Is there a nearby friend or family member that can come over so you are not alone right now?

[Froggi 4]

-hug brandy- love you dear

[luluc 6]

He fucking left without even telling his kids goodbye. My 9 year old won't even come near me after she told me she feels dead inside. No matter what anyone says I can not fucking do this. I can't. There is no way for me to do this.

very sorry - can't imagine how to deal w/little ones in that scenario....but your a fighter - period. you can't come to this board, like you have & shown guts / glory & bad w/out this just one more hurdle to combat.

it's probably what you may not want to hear - but on a legal front, get your affairs in order & fast. and if you want a hiding break from the world, TX isn't that far....you can have a crash pad here!!!

[A lot less 1]

BBK,

I'm so sorry for your pain and I know that nothing we say can ease the way you are feeling now. I can understand cause I too have worn your shoes many years ago. I didn't think that I deserved to see another tomorrow. I had friends to stick by me and they prayed for me constantly. I kept saying to myself, "today WILL be better than yesterday and tomorrow WILL be better than today".

Brandy, this too shall pass.

<<<<<<Hugs>>>>>>>

[plain 12]

He fucking left without even telling his kids goodbye. My 9 year old won't even come near me after she told me she feels dead inside. No matter what anyone says I can not fucking do this. I can't. There is no way for me to do this.

I second what Lulac said. You're a hard ass. You'll land feet down. You absolutely can do this, no matter how hard.

[Daisalana 33]

What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger. You WILL make it through this, and one day you'll forget how hard it was. Maybe not anytime soon, but someday.

You are a hardass and a great person. I'm sorry about your 9 year old, and without seeming invasive, I would recommend getting her into counseling asap... like tomorrow.. she needs to vent to a 3rd party and not internalize it.

[Froggi 4]

I know this is something stupid to be upset about but my 3 legged hamster died. I am actually upset and want to cry. I feel like a baby.

[Kat817 19]

FF is right, everything you are feeling, your DD is feeling a form of as well.

It is much easier to be mad, than it is to be sad for kids (and men oftentimes!!), so her anger is her way of coping---she too is having the "I can't do this" panic! She needs a way to let it out, and if yelling at you or whoever is how she lets it out, so be it.

Back years ago, when my DD was doing the mad not sad routine and we saw a councelor---she told me that the anger was a controlled feeling, sad was not, to voice the things she is sad about means they might come true. And she can say and think all the bad things she wants to about you and to you, because in the deepest recesses of her heart she knows you will love her anyway.

He recommended that I let her overhear me talking on the phone for instance, saying the things I needed her to hear, without having to say them to her. So even if I was to fake a call---I had a friend in on it, but he said for me to explain to the freind how we were going to make the next move in our lives, and to tell the friend how worried I was about my DD, that this is so unfair to her....side with her, without making her involved.

I don't know if that makes any sense----but it almost instantly made her seemed relieved. We survived it, you will too. It sucks more than I can say, when you are going through it.

The advice to get your affairs in order is spot on! Get a notebook and make detailed entries, if you use the computer back up with hard copy. If it is something you NEED to have proof of a date on, make a copy and mail it to yourself, when it shows up do not open, the postmark is admissible evidence of date.

If he so much as sneezes when visiting the kids, or if he calls listen in....document every little thing!

And without dragging your kids into it....take a little of their tactic to get through it.....don't just be sad.....get mad! You deserve to be treated fairly through any split, and fight for what you and your children deserve.

If you have any sort of proof of past affairs, drag it out!

Look out for your kids first, then yourself, let him worry about his life.

Be aware that he or someone associated with him, might very well be here spying on you, so handle yourself with dignity, and do not give him any sort of ammunition to use against you. When the need to really blast him with a mile long list of names etc. hits----PM any of us, all of us.....just don't do it in a public forum....there can be eyes and ears everywhere!!

Take care, and hang strong.........you know you are a fighter!

Kat

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

Brandy, Kat gave you great advise.

I am so sorry you are going through this. I wish there was something that I could say that would help, but I know there is not. Just know that we are all here for you, whatever you need.

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

I am probably going to get fired tomorrow. I have decided to confront the boss on how she thinks this little druggie can do no wrong. She needs to know the truth about this person, whether it costs me my job or not.

[plain 12]

I am probably going to get fired tomorrow. I have decided to confront the boss on how she thinks this little druggie can do no wrong. She needs to know the truth about this person, whether it costs me my job or not.

Suggest to your boss she random drug test both you and the tweak. First one to come up positive gets fired.

[Boo Boo Kitty 3]

Froggi--I am so sorry hun. It always sucks when pets die.

Thanks everyone for your support. It was a hard night. He ended up coming back and sleeping in my bed. WTF? I am sure by no means is this over. But all I can do is take care of my kids right now. I have no energy for him. I agree with Kat and I am not going to be posting publically anymore about it. Anyone who wants to can pm me.

I love you all, sucks so many have been here before. :thumbup: