Excited/Nervous/Scared

[J_Mkay 17]

Hey Everyone,

Just needing to get thoughts out there.

I'm a revision from band to sleeve. I've had my band removed and hopefully I will have sleeve surgery this summer. I'm going through all the motions for insurance approval. The time between is giving me alot of time to think.

I'm excited for the chance to finally lose weight successfully. I'm excited that maybe for the first time in my life I may possibly fit in "normal" size clothes. I'm excited that maybe....just maybe....with the weight loss I can maybe have children. I'm excited for the opportunity to not ache, not tucker out so darn easy, and just feel good for once.

And I'm also scared....

I'm scared of failing. I felt like a failure with my lap-band (even though I did have issues with it, even my surgeon said he won't even put them in anymore because of the complications many lap-band patients have), but I can't help but be scared of failure because I've failed so many times with trying to lose weight.

I'm nervous too...

I've never been "normal". I was a 10 pound baby...so I've been fat since birth. I have no clue what it's like to be what you would call normal. I don't want to say thin because I don't desire to be thin, I just want to be at a healthy weight....and I have no idea how that feels. I was a fat baby, kid, teen, and now adult. I have no real idea what life will be like. I know it will have to be better than how I feel/look now, but the unknown is scary. Thankfully my husband is very supportive, but I get nervous that he won't want to be with me anymore if I do lose alot of weight. He assures me that he doesn't care what size I am because he's in love with me, not my body (smart man...lol) but I can't help but have these fears since we began out relationship with me being the fluffy gal that I am.

Sorry for the long post....there's alot rolling around in my brain. I know that surgery is the best option for me, my doctors have been very encouraging, My mind just like to run emotional marathons....too bad my body hasn't. haha. Reading through the forum has always been helpful and encouraging. Anyways...thanks for listening to my ramblings.

[maddysmommy 6]

Hello!
I am in the same boat with you. I had my band put in in 2012 and removed in 2017. It was fine for the first year or so then BAM, one problem after another. Couldn’t keep anything down. Sometimes even liquids. I couldn’t wait to get that thing out. The surgeon asked if I wanted any type of revision at the time of removal and I said “no”
I thought “I can do this on my own”
A year later I’m 30 lbs heavier and had a consult for sleeve this past week. I was told this is almost a 100% guaranteed approval because I have a very good BCBS plan. Only need one nutrition class (which I did that same day) and a psych evaluation. No waiting period. When they told me that, I got scared, nervous, excited. I’m reading everything I can, having doubts one minute then “I’M DOING THIS!” the next minute. I’ve been struggling with my weight for 20+ yrs. I’m tired. I’m ready.

[TropicalBeachDoll 70]

Hey Everyone,
Just needing to get thoughts out there.
I'm a revision from band to sleeve. I've had my band removed and hopefully I will have sleeve surgery this summer. I'm going through all the motions for insurance approval. The time between is giving me alot of time to think.
I'm excited for the chance to finally lose weight successfully. I'm excited that maybe for the first time in my life I may possibly fit in "normal" size clothes. I'm excited that maybe....just maybe....with the weight loss I can maybe have children. I'm excited for the opportunity to not ache, not tucker out so darn easy, and just feel good for once.
And I'm also scared....
I'm scared of failing. I felt like a failure with my lap-band (even though I did have issues with it, even my surgeon said he won't even put them in anymore because of the complications many lap-band patients have), but I can't help but be scared of failure because I've failed so many times with trying to lose weight.
I'm nervous too...

I've never been "normal". I was a 10 pound baby...so I've been fat since birth. I have no clue what it's like to be what you would call normal. I don't want to say thin because I don't desire to be thin, I just want to be at a healthy weight....and I have no idea how that feels. I was a fat baby, kid, teen, and now adult. I have no real idea what life will be like. I know it will have to be better than how I feel/look now, but the unknown is scary. Thankfully my husband is very supportive, but I get nervous that he won't want to be with me anymore if I do lose alot of weight. He assures me that he doesn't care what size I am because he's in love with me, not my body (smart man...lol) but I can't help but have these fears since we began out relationship with me being the fluffy gal that I am.
Sorry for the long post....there's alot rolling around in my brain. I know that surgery is the best option for me, my doctors have been very encouraging, My mind just like to run emotional marathons....too bad my body hasn't. haha. Reading through the forum has always been helpful and encouraging. Anyways...thanks for listening to my ramblings.

What’s important is that you continue to make steps. I totally know how you feel. Don’t be nervous. Deep breaths. It’s going to be okay. Just stay focus and don’t get derailed. We are all in this together.

[frust8 963]

And if you need another friend J Mkay, I'm almost always in reach of my smartphone. I know what it's like to be a BIG girl,at 1 year I Was 35 inches tall 36lbs and the last time I could pass for being normal sized or at least proportioned right I was 5ft7in and 110 lbs, sounds okay? Then consider the fact,i was just 11 years old. And that was 61 years ago, honey I feel like I wrote the book on "fluffy".Now I'm waiting for,my own bariatric surgery, the unhappy bearer of a 47 BMI. Currently I stand at 5ft8in, shrunk some down since menopause, in my prime I was 3 in taller. As your vertebra slide down together you get a backache and sciatica. There's pain# 1, I have had 2 knee replacements so pain#2 and 3, I have had degenerative arthritis since 25, major pain #5. swelling in both ankles and calves, and worst of all I am tired of dragging my big fat body around, all 323 lbs of me. I have a chance with weight loss surgery that no diet plan could give me. And I am reaching over the edge of the Life Merry go Round and reaching for the gold ring before it's too late. In all probability I will have RnY bypass surgery in May 2018. And I can hardly wait for that day to come. I jokingly call myself the Bariatric Godmother because I'm just about the oldest active on here. A good sense of humor, you have to laugh to keep from crying, a lot of life experiences under my belt, buried a son and husband 4 1/2 years apart, so a few bumps bruises and scars along the way but I'm still alive and planning to stay that way. If you need any answers or feel lonely and friendless, I'm here. If I don't have an answer someone on Bariatric Pal will. In the meantime, Welcome and we hope you'll visit us here for a good long time.[emoji14] PS I'm redheaded, spunky and stubborn and intend to spend my remaining days slimmer, trimmer and fitter, and if I can do it-you can too. Neither one of us will accept failure, you hear?[emoji106]

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