Video: Emotional Mind Games After Surgery

[JCKlgl123 53]

I like Dr. V's down to earth approach and wanted to share: https://www.sleeveacademy.com/p/MindGames

Disclaimer: there are a few f*bombs and profanity used for those who are offended by cursing

[Healthy_life2 8,324]

Great stuff. THanks for posting this.

[FluffyChix 17,415]

Many critics of Dr. V. but I really love his stuff! Thanks for sharing!

[Apple203 1,314]

That was a good one -- and I thought I had seen them all!

[The Dora Milaje 69]

Love. This. I am type 1, first diet at 5.

[FluffyChix 17,415]

I really loved his distinction of 2 groups: those who've dealt with lifelong obesity and don't know what it feels like to live life as a normal sized adult. And those who were once thin and deal with adult-onset obesity. I'm the former and OMG. Is my outlook different from those who were formerly thin!

I also loved how he advised that we do really have to examine our relationship with food and its importance in our life. My struggle IS to de-prioritize its importance without completely conducting an exorcism. I don't want to get to the point where food is ONLY fuel. I'm hoping their can be a balance. But maybe that's just my fat brain telling me lies still? Dunno. But I'll figure it out in this coming year.

[JCKlgl123 53]

12 hours ago, The Dora Milaje said:

Love. This. I am type 1, first diet at 5.

Yep. Definitely! I remember my mom taking me to the misses section in 3rd grade.

[JCKlgl123 53]

9 hours ago, FluffyChix said:

I also loved how he advised that we do really have to examine our relationship with food and its importance in our life. My struggle IS to de-prioritize its importance without completely conducting an exorcism. I don't want to get to the point where food is ONLY fuel. I'm hoping their can be a balance. But maybe that's just my fat brain telling me lies still? Dunno. But I'll figure it out in this coming year.

It's so true! And I'm with you on hopefully finding a good balance. Since Nov, I've either overcompensated by making 3 course meals for the family or been leaving them high and dry because I'm so disinterested. Hopefully, things settle down and normalize where food isn't such a big deal, ya know...

[FluffyChix 17,415]

29 minutes ago, JCKlgl123 said:

It's so true! And I'm with you on hopefully finding a good balance. Since Nov, I've either overcompensated by making 3 course meals for the family or been leaving them high and dry because I'm so disinterested. Hopefully, things settle down and normalize where food isn't such a big deal, ya know...

Oh Lort! I hear ya! Luckily for Mr. F. I filled up the freezer with leftovers that I made for him thinking, "Oh I will warm that up for him after the operation." LOL, but it was such an easy thing that I ended up cooking afterward! And now that it's really hit that I'm forever changed, I have to feed him a freezer full of food. LOL. I do hope we are able to negotiate a new "healthy" normal. You know? I believe our non-gaining future depends on it.

LOL. Like we just got back in and it's time for dinner, but DH and I used to have wine or cocktails and an little appetizer in the old days. But for me, it's either dinner or appetizer and no drinks. And I'm so close to breaking into onderland that I don't want to indulge and do a modified Saturday date night. So I made him an app and a glass of wine and told him that I had to go in the other room until he was through cuz I was feeling a little put-upon and sad-sack. So here I am, getting a psychological boost from the boards while he eats and drinks!

Luckily, he understands and asked if he should not eat/drink. I told him, I was the one who had the surgery not him. And it's up to me to make good choices. So I have and did.

[frust8 963]

Fluffy,Mr F. is one lucky rooster[emoji215] to have you in his coop. And I am happy you are starting to see Onderland shining in the distance. Someday it will shine for ME I believe it and it will be so. Might not,be as fast because I'm Coming down off a higher weight ledge, I'll have to see Twoferville first but I believe I can achieve, even if it takes 12-18 months. I'll join you down there, as the old standard says "It's Only A Matter of Time"

Sent from my VS880PP using BariatricPal mobile app

[The Dora Milaje 69]

This video was what I needed to see yesterday. I have been struggling with some emotional drama with my SO and reverted to my old bad habits -- eating trash to deal with my feelings even though I felt like trash afterward. This was just Thursday and Friday so I didn't get all the way off course but he's right. I have to change my relationship with food AND with others. Have to.

Also, I realized I was self-sabotaging. I have been fat for so long (see first diet at 5) I'm not sure I believe I deserve to be a healthy weight. I talk a good game but deep down I have doubts. I need to work on showing myself the same grace I would show to a friend who was going through this process.

I will discuss with my therapist and I appreciate all the information and support here.

[FluffyChix 17,415]

20 minutes ago, The Dora Milaje said:

This video was what I needed to see yesterday. I have been struggling with some emotional drama with my SO and reverted to my old bad habits -- eating trash to deal with my feelings even though I felt like trash afterward. This was just Thursday and Friday so I didn't get all the way off course but he's right. I have to change my relationship with food AND with others. Have to.

Also, I realized I was self-sabotaging. I have been fat for so long (see first diet at 5) I'm not sure I believe I deserve to be a healthy weight. I talk a good game but deep down I have doubts. I need to work on showing myself the same grace I would show to a friend who was going through this process.

I will discuss with my therapist and I appreciate all the information and support here.

((hugs)) I share some similar feelings about having doubts and wondering if I either deserve to be normal weight or if I can actually make a weight loss goal that I set. Good that you have a therapist to work through this with!!

[frust8 963]

We all deserve to be in the normal bracket, worked for it, planned for it, even slightly rearranged our bodies to achieve it. Normal -yes, Average-no, average is as close to the bottom as the top. We will not settle for being bottom feeders, we are and will,be slim, trim and sleek! Power to Us All! [emoji106]

Sent from my VS880PP using BariatricPal mobile app

[charismatic 80]

Haven’t watched the video yet but I will. I love me some Dr. V.

I tried explaining to someone once, I have no idea what normal feels like. I wore a size 24 women’s in the 6th grade. I’ve already lost more weight now than I ever remember losing at one time. My surgeon has a goal for me but my own goal will still leave me obese and in my mind if I could reach 250# I would be a success!! Still obese but not giving a damn. I know that’s how I feel now and maybe I’ll feel different later.

I’m scared to get excited about anything I’ve lost so far because it is no where near enough. I also know it’s only been 3 months total and 4 weeks post op and that it’s going to take time.

This process is already weird to me - I don’t like my ankles touching because I can feel the bones, my wedding set is loose on my finger and I’m starting to see the veins beneath my skin more. Very weird but totally neat at the same time.

[JCKlgl123 53]

On 4/7/2018 at 8:03 PM, FluffyChix said:

Luckily, he understands and asked if he should not eat/drink. I told him, I was the one who had the surgery not him. And it's up to me to make good choices. So I have and did.

The willpower and mindset is awesome! Looks like you're pretty darn close to your balance (I may have sat there and took a bite) Good for you!

19 hours ago, The Dora Milaje said:

I need to work on showing myself the same grace I would show to a friend who was going through this process.

I'm so glad it helped! <3 And girl, I can relate..

Self-realization is the first step towards your success. And it looks like you have a good plan in place to be successful long-term. It's a marathon, not a sprint.