Beginning my journey (finally)

[kfaery215 14]

Hi, I am also beginning my journey to a new me. I have struggled all my life with obesity. My mom taught weight watchers for most of my childhood and I know all the rules, tips, and tricks. Didn't matter. I have poor self esteem and low confidence. Bullied heavily in school. Now I just turned 32 last week and I'm 336lbs. I can't play with my 9 and 6 yo boys. Hubby is disabled veteran that is 380lbs. Life is rough for us and traditional diets are not working.

I am scheduled for my first class where I get my binder. I may be able to skip the dieting wait period due to my sleep apnea. I'm just waiting to get my sleep study record from 2012.

Hubby isn't totally on board so I need support. Found you guys! More to come as I progress!

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[marylandchick 3]

I attended my first nutrition class last week (7 more to go). I have 180 day diet and nutrition waiting period. My husband is very supportive and plans to attend the nutrition classes and support group sessions. Good luck on your journey. I wish you the very best!

[kakatlady612 1,053]

I'm here, always ready to listen, I'm the Bariatric Grandma, probably the oldest pal currently, doesn't mean I have everything together, just means it took a few more years for me to have my "come to Jesus" moment about weight loss. Like many I tried diets, most every one to come out under the sun, least I ever weighed was 7lb12oz, most 355 last October. I'm currently 323 on a 5ft8in body so I have a BMI of 47-48. I'm widowed have 1 son who lives with,me code name on here is Tomkitten, real name is Bryan, 1 daughter R D short for Rotten Daughter and she so richly deserves the title, and 1 son who died suddenly at 31, of an underdiagnosed heart abnormality. So I have had some sorrow in my life, but then we all have. I am 72,recently parted company with 1 bariatric program and will be switching to another. I had contact with ex program for 2 1/2 years, after putting my faith and trust in them they kicked me to the curb. If you want to hear more I can tell you or you can go to my posting on "Change Your Hospital" I wrote it shortly after the experience. I am not soured on WLS in general, only on them. I will be happy and proud to answer any and all questions you have. I originally was having bariatric surgery early-mid March in Columbus Ohio, now maybe a slight delay but I still plan a roux n Y gastric bypass. I have done oodles of research, feel it's best for my case but know about VSG and the others. Also had a lot of life experience, a straight shooting type of gal, I promise never to tell you any lies. I've suffered with esteem issues also, low confidence. Don't sound like it? Well I'm a lot braver on paper than I was in the real life. I was a wet soggy doormat for friends and family, went through a lot of belittlements and putdowns trying to win love. First thing I thought was I'm not worthwhile, I'm a nobody, I don't deserve to be treated better. Then I reared back on my haunches, said I gave no one permission to treat me shabbily and I'm trying to stand up tall and proud again. I've had 2 knee replacements so not as easy as it once was. But i will make it through, I'm tough, I'm strong and I deserve the best of everything. Also have sleep apnea, GERD and arthritis but I'll still keep going.

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[Jean E. 95]

Congrats on your decision. Get ready for the ride of your life, but it's a good one. You will discover things about yourself either you never knew or you just put deep in the back of your memories so you wouldn't have to miss what you no longer could do.

Support is important, but you need to keep in mind you are doing this for you and nobody can take you down, or make you feel bad about yourself and your efforts without you giving them permission to do so. So don't use lack of support as an excuse to fail (as we all have) because failure is no longer an option. You will succeed because you are worth it and so are those babies. Hopefully, your husband will start to see the positive changes in you and jump on board. When I say positive changes, I don't just mean physical. You will have mental changes, emotional changes, and perhaps even spiritual changes. You are going to find inner strength and confidence you didn't know you had. Those are all positive, non-scale changes that you will see.

Remember to always see the tiniest victories both on and off the scale, and not just focus on the big goals. If you just focus on the big numbers you will miss all of the little victories and blessings along this journey. And it is those little victories that will get you through the rough spots, not the big ones. Yes the big goals are important but sometimes we miss so much in life when we look past what is right in front of us.

Also try and remember that your journey is just that YOUR journey. We all want to hear about everyone else's experiences and then we want to pick out the best of those and decide that is how our path will work. That is a great place to start and a great reference to have, but just keep in mind, you are the only you there is, and everyone's journey is special for them. You will have ups and downs and laughs and cries. You will get scared, frustrated, happy, and relieved again and again. It is all part of it. Part of getting to know the new you. Enjoy the ride.

What surgery are you having? What are you goals? I am a very goal driven person in everything I do. But, I had to learn quickly that putting a timeline on your goals is not the best plan, at least for me. Simply because my goals are much too aggressive for most people and I tend to do whatever I need to do to make those goals even if it is detrimental to my health. Thus how I ended up with an eating disorder in high school and college. It didn't help in the long run obviously and just destroyed my metabolism. So I set small goals or milestones to focus on just for measurement purposes. Like, every 10 lbs. is a milestone for me, then of course every 25 lbs. is an even bigger milestone. And then I identified different weights I wanted to reach, like getting out of the 400's, then out of the 300's and my next is to get to 250 etc. different steps along the way I can Celebrate myself and my victories. Then there are the non-scale victories like being able to step up on a curb without excruciating pain, or walking around a grocery or department store just for the fun of it. And don't get me started on trying on different size clothes. LOL! That is a mental game I still don't have my mind wrapped around.

Anyway, all of you can do this. I know it looks like an enormous mountain right now, but in one year you will be looking down that mountain. Believe it! That year is going to pass whether you made this choice or not, so now you are on your way to better health and a happier you. The time is going to fly by and your little 1/4 lb. losses and 1/2 lb. losses are going to add up without you even realizing it. Just remember that when you have those frustrating stalls. Remember to celebrate the small victories.

Me, I had my DS 9 months ago today and have lost 227 lbs. to date. 60 of those lbs. I lost between my first doctor visit and my surgery which was 4 months and three days. So 167 lbs. in 9 months, or an average of 18.5 lbs. per month. See how fast it adds up. I still have maybe 60 lbs. or so to lose. My doctor will not set a numeral weight goal. He said as long as I am eating healthy and getting in 10,000 steps a day (which I am working on) my body will find it's own healthy weight. But for now, I am feeling pretty good about my accomplishment and I wish the same for y'all.

God bless you now and always.

[kakatlady612 1,053]

Good for you and God Bless, you are an inspiration to me also and you didn't even know it.

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[Jean E. 95]

That is one of my many rewards, to be an inspiration or to boost others. We all do that with what we are living through. We all get it, at different levels perhaps, but we all get it. For instance, I know weight is a big thing, I mean the actual numbers, but different weight looks and carries different on different people. I started this as a curvy lady that nobody believed I weight 487 lbs. So to put it in perspective, I was a size 6X. Now we ladies are all about sizes, right, Now I can walk into a regular store and put on a 1X in most everything. I am still wrapping my head around that one. LOL!

[MzNatalia 10]

1 hour ago, Jean E. said:

Congrats on your decision. Get ready for the ride of your life, but it's a good one. You will discover things about yourself either you never knew or you just put deep in the back of your memories so you wouldn't have to miss what you no longer could do.

Support is important, but you need to keep in mind you are doing this for you and nobody can take you down, or make you feel bad about yourself and your efforts without you giving them permission to do so. So don't use lack of support as an excuse to fail (as we all have) because failure is no longer an option. You will succeed because you are worth it and so are those babies. Hopefully, your husband will start to see the positive changes in you and jump on board. When I say positive changes, I don't just mean physical. You will have mental changes, emotional changes, and perhaps even spiritual changes. You are going to find inner strength and confidence you didn't know you had. Those are all positive, non-scale changes that you will see.

Remember to always see the tiniest victories both on and off the scale, and not just focus on the big goals. If you just focus on the big numbers you will miss all of the little victories and blessings along this journey. And it is those little victories that will get you through the rough spots, not the big ones. Yes the big goals are important but sometimes we miss so much in life when we look past what is right in front of us.

Also try and remember that your journey is just that YOUR journey. We all want to hear about everyone else's experiences and then we want to pick out the best of those and decide that is how our path will work. That is a great place to start and a great reference to have, but just keep in mind, you are the only you there is, and everyone's journey is special for them. You will have ups and downs and laughs and cries. You will get scared, frustrated, happy, and relieved again and again. It is all part of it. Part of getting to know the new you. Enjoy the ride.

What surgery are you having? What are you goals? I am a very goal driven person in everything I do. But, I had to learn quickly that putting a timeline on your goals is not the best plan, at least for me. Simply because my goals are much too aggressive for most people and I tend to do whatever I need to do to make those goals even if it is detrimental to my health. Thus how I ended up with an eating disorder in high school and college. It didn't help in the long run obviously and just destroyed my metabolism. So I set small goals or milestones to focus on just for measurement purposes. Like, every 10 lbs. is a milestone for me, then of course every 25 lbs. is an even bigger milestone. And then I identified different weights I wanted to reach, like getting out of the 400's, then out of the 300's and my next is to get to 250 etc. different steps along the way I can Celebrate myself and my victories. Then there are the non-scale victories like being able to step up on a curb without excruciating pain, or walking around a grocery or department store just for the fun of it. And don't get me started on trying on different size clothes. LOL! That is a mental game I still don't have my mind wrapped around.

Anyway, all of you can do this. I know it looks like an enormous mountain right now, but in one year you will be looking down that mountain. Believe it! That year is going to pass whether you made this choice or not, so now you are on your way to better health and a happier you. The time is going to fly by and your little 1/4 lb. losses and 1/2 lb. losses are going to add up without you even realizing it. Just remember that when you have those frustrating stalls. Remember to Celebrate the small victories.

Me, I had my DS 9 months ago today and have lost 227 lbs. to date. 60 of those lbs. I lost between my first doctor visit and my surgery which was 4 months and three days. So 167 lbs. in 9 months, or an average of 18.5 lbs. per month. See how fast it adds up. I still have maybe 60 lbs. or so to lose. My doctor will not set a numeral weight goal. He said as long as I am eating healthy and getting in 10,000 steps a day (which I am working on) my body will find it's own healthy weight. But for now, I am feeling pretty good about my accomplishment and I wish the same for y'all.

God bless you now and always.

Welcome Kfaery! I congratulate you on your decision and wish you good luck on your journey. I had to do 6 months of supervised weight loss to get approval, but I hope they give you approval without it. Hopefully your husband sees your dedication and jumps on board.

Thanks, Jean, for sharing. I’m just starting on my DS journey (surgery next Monday) and you are an inspiration to me. I was a bit discouraged because I started in a the 400’s myself and figured that it would take forever to get the weight off. I’m going to work on the plan and hopefully I will be where you are in 9 mos. Did you get the regular DS or a modification?

[Jean E. 95]

congratulations! I had the regular DS. I will be happy to be here for you. Ask me anything you want to, anytime.

[Jean E. 95]

10 minutes ago, MzNatalia said:

Welcome Kfaery! I congratulate you on your decision and wish you good luck on your journey. I had to do 6 months of supervised weight loss to get approval, but I hope they give you approval without it. Hopefully your husband sees your dedication and jumps on board.

Thanks, Jean, for sharing. I’m just starting on my DS journey (surgery next Monday) and you are an inspiration to me. I was a bit discouraged because I started in a the 400’s myself and figured that it would take forever to get the weight off. I’m going to work on the plan and hopefully I will be where you are in 9 mos. Did you get the regular DS or a modification?

When you get out of the 400's you will be on top of the world, and when you get out of the 300's, well I just can't even begin to describe that feeling. I kept a daily journal for a while of my feelings and fears and joys. It gives me a boost on those tough days.

[MzNatalia 10]

46 minutes ago, Jean E. said:

congratulations! I had the regular DS. I will be happy to be here for you. Ask me anything you want to, anytime.

Thanks, that means a lot! I'm getting the Loop DS, but I hope that I'll be able to have similar success.

42 minutes ago, Jean E. said:

When you get out of the 400's you will be on top of the world, and when you get out of the 300's, well I just can't even begin to describe that feeling. I kept a daily journal for a while of my feelings and fears and joys. It gives me a boost on those tough days.

I made it into the 300's and it's kind of surreal. I haven't wrapped my mind around it yet. That's a good idea to write a journal to help keep your eyes focused on the ultimate goal.

[kfaery215 14]

Thank you all for making me feel so welcomed! I loved reading everyone's responses! I haven't yet gone to the clinic, but I took their online seminar and quiz and am working with a (so far) wonderful person at the clinic. I know my hubby will come around eventually. See the biggest hang up for him is the quantity of food. I was fully aware of the portion change, have been for about 2 years since I started researching this. My insurance wasn't cut and dry so it was confusing and I was too chicken to talk to someone about it. But now that I am at my biggest and it hurts to basically do anything it was finally time to make a change. Anyhow, portions. My husband is one of those guys who used to be the skinny guy who could pack away an entire pizza and not gain an ounce. He had a stroke at 23 while in the air force and after that everything changed except his appetite. Because he cannot exercise he gained up to a highest of 425lbs. He was a stay at home dad for the last 8 years and only because we were on the verge of losing our house did he get a job at our international airport. I work a high stress job as a security company emergency dispatcher. For the last year I worked 12 hour overnight shifts. I ate my stress and gained 30 more pounds. I keep getting away from the portions point lol! So him being a big eater it actually creeps him out when I tell him about the different phases pre and post operation and life time eating thereafter. I am willing to make that sacrafice for the sake of my health because I have seen first hand how quickly life can be taken away. I am scared to death that he is eating himself into an early grave and there's nothing I can do but be supportive and try to encourage healthy eating. I have since switch to 8 hour daylight shifts so I am home with my kids by 3:30 and we have family time and I make fairly decent meals...at least better than what they were. My favorite is going to my grocer and getting good quality produce and picking 3 new combinations every night of what I am sauteing. I also bought an Instant Pot and omg, ladies, let me tell you how this is saving my life right now LOL!

I also suffer from bipolar with anxiety and frequent bouts of manic depression. I was stuck in a depression rut for almost 2 years. Lost the desire to do everything I love. I am in the process of officially getting my ADHD diagnosed so I can be treated for that too. It's starting to interfere with me getting a promotion of leadership. I have taken care of everyone else the last 11 years. It's time. For. Me.

These photos are from my brother's wedding October 2017. Green shirt is hubby if it isn't obvious. (grey shirt is my brother, cowboy hat is my dad)

[newmebithebypass 713]

My hubby is a big guy too likes to eat but he supports me because he knows how rapidly my health is declining and he wants to be here with me for a long time and I believe he will get the surgery one day too when he is ready just not yet

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[frust8 963]

Show him a good example and he might,just come around to it himself. Good luck and keep the faith.

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[Frustr8 7,886]

And me checking in 6 months later. I am where you dream of when you start your journeys.
I am finishing up my presurgical/liver shrinking diet. I have lost 15 pounds since August 1st almost a month ago. And next Wednesday September 5th 2018 at 7 AM EDT at,the Ohio State University Hospital- Wexner Medical Center with my Bariatric Surgeon Bradley J Needleman MD I will receive my RNY gastric bypass surgery.
Am I excited? You bet I am, I scarcely can wait.
But mote than the mere joy, I am deeply humbled. You see,reader, I was a person who things making it difficult to reach,,this day. You see I completed another facilities program twice and then they refused me my surgery. I had to seek another program, complete some facets for a third time, the saying is: The Third Time is the Charm, this is true except I worked very hard, many times thinking it was without hope, and I grew tired, oh so tired! You see I am 72 years old, far beyond the average age, my resilence isn't what it once was, some things do take longer, but i am stubborn, natural strawberry blonde hair, so red-head stubborn, I am dedicated, commuted and do believe in ME, in the rightness of what I am doing. . And I made it through, swamps, roadblocks and nay-sayers but I made it through.
If you are reading and think Oh this is TOO HARD. yes it is HARD but it is so so worth it. And never think, oh it's TOO Late, I live as a witness it is NOT!
Come join me, it is the JOURNEY OF YOUR LIFETIME, and a renewed life waits you afterward.
If you have the dream, the desire, the commitment, YOUR FUTURE AWAITS