Little Green getting little(r)

[Little Green 583]

Also, obviously, I'm not even attempting to use plant-based Protein sources at this point. When I get to pureed food I'll see how much protein I can tolerate in whole food form and then either continue supplementing with Premier Protein or start supplementing with 1-2 of the plant-based shakes.

[Little Green 583]

I'm not feeling well. I think I way, way overdid it yesterday and I still didn't meet my Fluid or Protein requirements. Today I feel dizzy, weak, and in pain. I am going to get up and walk, obviously, but that is going to be secondary to meeting my requirements and resting.

[Frustr8 7,886]

Oh honey, bless your❤. You've come down from all that hurray bureau I've had my surgery high and you're starting to hit the wall. From what I've heard on here it is very common, although I'm sure that's of little comfort to you. Be gentle and kind to yourself, don't push yourself too hard, if it were me I'd be a bad one. I'd try to overdue right afterwards. Remember your body is in a WTF mode, it's as bewildered as you by all the changes. I had a mini-level yesterday, but this one's mostly my Fault. As I've told EVERYBODY I have an important appointment on Thursday as the next step towards my own surgery. The last few days I've tried to be meticulous with my diet, and call me vain but I increased my exercise level hoping to melt off some more weight. I ended up exhausting myself into low blood sugar. I just want them to look favorably on me as a Bariatric surgery client. I've started using a Protein Shake a day to see if that helps,.According to My Fitness Pal I can eat up 1800 calories daily and still lose weight, I've been averaging 1100 to 1300, and the pounds are not disappearing. Guess it is more complex than calories in, calories out. I don't always eat too much until supper, even then it is small portions, don't eat big like I used to, usually Protein, veggies, and tossed salad with small dressing on the side. No soda, cut out carbs as much as possible, infrequent coffee or reg. tea.
It's becoming a chore but I so want to succeed. Maybe the dietician Thursday will have some more good tips.

[Little Green 583]

5 hours ago, Frustr8 said:

The last few days I've tried to be meticulous with my diet, and call me vain but I increased my exercise level hoping to melt off some more weight. I ended up exhausting myself into low blood sugar. I just want them to look favorably on me as a Bariatric surgery client. I've started using a Protein Shake a day to see if that helps,.According to My Fitness Pal I can eat up 1800 calories daily and still lose weight, I've been averaging 1100 to 1300, and the pounds are not disappearing. Guess it is more complex than calories in, calories out. I don't always eat too much until supper, even then it is small portions, don't eat big like I used to, usually Protein, veggies, and tossed salad with small dressing on the side. No soda, cut out carbs as much as possible, infrequent coffee or reg. tea.
It's becoming a chore but I so want to succeed. Maybe the dietician Thursday will have some more good tips.

I think it's common to maintain or even gain weight when you first increase the intensity of exercise. Muscle repair = Water retention or something like that. That could be why. Don't despair, I know that's hard to hear after all the bumps in the road you've had! Stay the course and you will make it.

[Little Green 583]

Feeling much better than this morning. I think I was definitely close to being dehydrated but I've been sipping all day, about 30 oz of Water and 12 oz of (extremely delicious) broth plus a Premier Protein, and resting with brief walks here and there. I'm still having increased pain in my belly - there's one area in particular that protests with extreme prejudice when I move certain ways (which I unfortunately cannot predict). It produces a very sharp, intense "seam ripping" sensation, like I'm stretching something that's been tied tightly. The pain doesn't directly correlate with an incision, but the surgeon explained that incisions are often done at angles or even stretched depending on the needs of the ones running the show, so I could have damage/bruising in muscles underneath my belly despite not being directly under an incision.

I had a LOT of this type of pain overnight because I tried sleeping in the bed on my side and it seemed like no matter what I did, I would constantly pull at this one spot and get the awful knife-like pain. So, that's why I've been taking it easy today. It's still sore but I think it's getting better. Honestly if it weren't for that one spot I don't think I'd have any belly pain at all. My incisions are a bit tender if I touch them and I'm bruised and beaten-looking (and worst of all, despite not having any pain when I administer my Lovenox injections, over the course of a few hours the sites bruise and get tender ) but mostly my belly is comfortable.

Mentally/emotionally I've been feeling pretty down, mostly from loneliness. My husband had to go back to our city so he can work, my mom works from home during the day so she's here but inaccessible. My parents' house is out in the boonies, I can't drive, so trying to convince people to come all the way out here to visit when they've got work and kids and activities is pretty futile. I'm very much a social butterfly and even just sitting around doing nothing is better if someone else is around. Maybe I'll find an adult daycare to put myself in for the next week or two

Sorry for the long updates - like I said, I'm very lonely! Just shouting into my own personal void over here.

[Little Green 583]

Another day, about the same. Belly pain, no energy, lonely.

I did have a BM on my own this morning without having had Smooth Move tea or Miralax recently. That was nice, good to know all the plumbing is functional.

[Frustr8 7,886]

You will feel much much better when you can go back home where everything is familiar and even more important,yours. I know you ❤ your parents, you're grateful for their hospitality, but ET and Little Green. want to go home!😛

[Little Green 583]

6 hours ago, Frustr8 said:

You will feel much much better when you can go back home where everything is familiar and even more important,yours. I know you ❤ your parents, you're grateful for their hospitality, but ET and Little Green. want to go home!😛

Honestly I think the key issue is lack of driving. I am VERY INDEPENDENT lol. My mom has a super stressful job and I've been wanting to go get a pedicure since Sunday but we haven't been able to find time. The fact that I cannot get into the car and take myself somewhere just makes me frickin insane. Ugh. This will pass.... only 8 more days until my appointment.... this will pass......

[Little Green 583]

I think I'm going to go home on Saturday. I'm so depressed and lonely that I think it's causing my pain and energy to be worse than it reasonably should be at a week post-op. I want to be able to get a hug from my husband when I'm feeling sad, and he'd be more than happy to drive me around even if it's just to go nowhere. I could also take buses in our city - there's no buses in the very rural area where my parents live

On a related note, crying post-op is quite painful, from the belly-bouncing during to the nose-blowing afterward. Ouch.

[Little Green 583]

I talk to my mom and my husband and took some pain meds and I'm feeling much better. I am going home without the cats on Saturday, and then my husband will drive me back up next Friday for the 2-week appointment and we'll stay a night or two then my parents will help us move the cats back in.

I'm going to text my therapist tomorrow for an appointment next week (yay for calling an Uber to take me there & back) and I might see if I can get my antidepressant in a liquid formulation.

With this plan in place I'm going to focus on the positives, keep my eyes on the prize, and focus on my health and recovery. I'm getting stronger every day, I have no issues with vomiting, nausea, or difficulty getting liquids down, I have a great support team, the pain meds help me feel better, I'm sleeping well, lots to be thankful for.

[Little Green 583]

Having a pretty good day today. Pain might be a bit worse, I showered this morning so there was some twisting and turning and bending that was pretty painful and might have riled things up. I'm in a much better mood and looking forward to going home on Saturday! Tonight I am going to get that pedicure I've been wanting and tomorrow evening my SIL and niece are coming to visit. Hopefully those things should help the rest of the time before I'm home pass swiftly. I got my psych to call in a liquid formulation of my antidepressant so I'm hoping going home and taking that will help me stabilize my rather dark moods.

Other than the belly pain, everything is pretty much smooth sailing, recovery-wise. I've had a bit of "whoa" feelings a couple times when swallowing a pill that didn't quite feel right (I'm still working on the right balance of liquid to take them with), but otherwise absolutely no protestations from the new plumbing. I'm not hungry and everything I eat tastes fine (except Premier Protein Cookies & creme... did NOT like that one) so I'm happy with my diet. One product that I am really enjoying, funny enough, is the Premier Protein clear protein Water. I originally said I thought it was too sweet and artificially flavored but found that if I diluted it with water and drank it ice cold, it's quite delicious. That is probably the only animal-based protein I think I will keep in my rotation until I have enough volume to get protein from food. PP shakes have served me well but I'll be glad to see them go.

My plan for pureed food is to focus on nutrition as a whole rather than just cramming as many high-protein foods into the blender as possible. Fiber and nutrients are important to me - to health and recovery - and taste and variety will hopefully help me expand my post-op palate and avoid food aversions and dietary imbalances. Of course, I plan to supplement as needed with the protein water (also counted as a fluid) or one or two of my plant-based shakes per day to appease the doctor's wish for 60g of protein. But, if my food-based protein only totals 35 or 40g for awhile, I'm not going to sweat it.

Pureed foods I can't wait to have are Beans of every kind, hummus, oatmeal, Peanut Butter, mashed potatoes & sweet potatoes, green beans, maybe some corn, guacamole, mushrooms in gravy, fruit (especially in sorbet form!), and my delicious homemade marinara sauce. I wish we didn't have to avoid fibrous veggies like broccoli and asparagus, as those two are my favorites! I'm soooo damn excited to eat plants again, even if they will be in funky applesauce form

[Little Green 583]

Pain was worse overall today, although I took smaller doses of pain meds to see how I would feel, plus as I said earlier I showered which involved some painful twists and turns. (After I go home I'll be in our accessible shower with a seat and handheld showerhead which should eliminate those movements.) This evening I spoke with my surgeon on the phone - she called me! I felt like I was talking to a celebrity! - about my pain and she feels confident it's coming from the "G-J" (gastrojejunostomy) area, which is where the pouch is attached to the intestine.

According to her excellent explanation--that I'm sure I will butcher--the nearest incision, which is the largest one, allowed access through the fascia to the pouch, and that opening in the fascia was dilated repeatedly during surgery as they brought tools (particularly the stapler) in and out. In layman's terms, the muscle they went through to get where they needed to go took a beating along the way and now the sutures (staples? not sure) where they closed it up are getting tugged on and it's painful. This probably also explains the tenderness and bruising in that area.

My belly is very large (yay for guaranteed need for plastic surgery) and hangs and pulls with gravity which doesn't help, and every time I have one of those sharp, stabbing pains, I'm likely irritating it a bit, which is why it talks to me a lot after I do something that causes me to have a lot of those in a row. She wasn't blasé about it like it's nothing, but she wasn't scared and didn't ask that I come in. She said as long as I don't have a fever or chills (nope and nope) and that the pain is with abdominal wall movement and not from walking or being jostled (yes to the former, nope to the latter) then I'm probably ok.

I see her in a week for my post-op appt, and I'll certainly call if anything changes.

So here's my plan. Still walking and doing for myself to the extent that I can, I'm just gonna baby the hell out of it. I've experimented and found out certain tricks that help - splinting it with my hand when I sit or stand, raising my left leg behind me when I bend at the waist, etc. so I'm going to use those and probably wear my abdominal binder more often for some extra support. I'm hoping if I give it 2-3 days of TLC it'll get to a point of being healed (presumably, like the rest of the situation in there) where I can do those normal movements without much pain.

I plan to continue with the liquid pain meds (oxycodone in my case) but perhaps at 3ml instead of 5ml, which is what I did today. And I'll alternate with Tylenol--once I get some that's not infant formula I figured that out today; I had stopped taking it because it didn't help (and it was sweet as f_ck and disgusting) but because it's infant formula it's only 160mg lolol.

So, in summary. 325mg of Tylenol for inflammation alternated with 3-5ml of oxycodone for pain, and try to avoid any of those big stabby ripping pains, and hopefully in a day or two it will advance in healing and I can finally put the "OH HOLY F_CKIN BALLSACK, THAT HURTS!" pain in my rearview mirror.

[Little Green 583]

Going home in the morning!

And you guysssss... it's working! I took some Tylenol and moved very cautiously today and did the best I could to avoid any ripping pains. And it's working! Tonight I was able to stand up twice without any pain at all! I'm still going to take it easy for another day or so but YAY! I'm on my way to being pain-free!!!!

[Little Green 583]

Home now! I can definitely see why I wanted to recover at Mom's. It's so difficult to stop myself from taking care of my husband and stuff around the house just by second nature or unconsciously. Unfortunately despite not helping with unloading the car, I did enough running around - including unthinkingly bending over to vacuum with our little handheld vac - that my belly started protesting again. Not quite as loudly or painfully as a few days ago, so I'm still happy about my progress, but enough for me to know I need to sit down for a bit and keep taking it easy. So my husband (I guess I'll call him Mr. Green for ease of readability in the future) is unpacking as best he can and loading up the fridge with my shakes and Protein waters. Love him

It's so good to be home! Thanks to the holiday, Mr. Green and I have the next two full days to be together in the quiet - no one working from home, no cats running around. Just the two of us. So happy!

Sorry for the endless posts. I'll just keep shouting into the void here, it's nice to journal and maybe it will help someone some day.

[Frustr8 7,886]

It does and it will even more in the future. I'm still avoiding that Jolly Giant and his vegetable factory, hopefully the next time he comes into my valley I can tell him "I just had surgery,and can only do light things" a 50 bushel container of vegetables is too big for me. Hurray,hurray,for,making it,back home.😜