vanelifejourney 27 Posted January 28, 2018 So, the conversation went like this. Person who I’m sure I want in my life moving forward, “ ummm well, if that’s what you want to do. You know, I lost 50lbs the natural way but eating small portions and walking.” Me: “ I’m glad you’re happy with your results. There’s no hard way or easy way, there’s only the permanent way and however means you choose to get there is the right way.” The person I no longer like, “ well, sorry you don’t like what you see in the mirror that you want to mutualize your body to be “skinny” that’s really low self esteem” WTF. by now I wanted to b***h slap someone but I took the high road and responded. “ you don’t have to understand or even agree with my decision but I ask that you respect it and me. “ End of conversation. My rant goes: why the stigma of wls vs the natural way. I get so annoyed when I hear that statement. The perception that going the surgical route is not by any means the easy way to go. End rant. 7 2 1 1 gwndls36 , Normaj3443, sillykitty and 8 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kakatlady612 1,053 Posted January 28, 2018 @vanelifejourney, this sounds so familiar. Had an almost parallel coversation with someone possibly 140 lbs soaking wet. Wished he could have walked a mile in my moccasins but he b would,have found they pinched.Sent from my VS880PP using BariatricPal mobile app 3 Frustr8, Skinnygirl04 and soph504 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Creekimp13 5,840 Posted January 28, 2018 I keep thinking of the same thing being told to someone with obstructive coronary artery disease... "Did you do it on your own and correct your diet to avoid a heart attack? Or did you do it the easy way and have that pesky triple bypass they said you needed. That's not natural! You must have low self esteem!" 11 9 BeeCat, Brassapple, raeancin and 17 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
summerset 5,265 Posted January 28, 2018 8 hours ago, Creekimp13 said: "Did you do it on your own and correct your diet to avoid a heart attack? Or did you do it the easy way and have that pesky triple bypass they said you needed. That's not natural! You must have low self esteem!" Well, it's definitely something to consider to say when looking at the dramatic impact an ideal diet and best medical treatment has on coronary heart disease. 1 Orchids&Dragons reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SueSaBelle 57 Posted January 28, 2018 I had a similar discussion with my Mom. I purposely waited to tell her over the phone so if it went bad, I could hang up. It wasn't as bad as I thought but it still hurts. I wanted to say "after dieting on and off for 37 years your way and things not working, maybe this would be the tool that does work. Can't you be supportive - even if you have to be silent to do so? Thank God my husband keeps my perspective on track and makes me laugh during these stressful situations. 4 Frustr8, teacherlady095, Orchids&Dragons and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Creekimp13 5,840 Posted January 29, 2018 https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/262226.php 2 Orchids&Dragons and SueSaBelle reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
vanelifejourney 27 Posted January 29, 2018 https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/262226.phpGreat article, thanks for sharing. Especially loved the resolution quote: "The suggestion that obesity is not a disease but rather a consequence of a chosen lifestyle exemplified by overeating and/or inactivity is equivalent to suggesting that lung cancer is not a disease because it was brought about by individual choice to smoke cigarettes." 1 Freshface reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SueSaBelle 57 Posted January 29, 2018 Great article Creekimp13! I hate that sometimes I still feel like that little girl who needs her Mommy's permission even though I go my own way. I know she will always have something negative to say when it comes to my weight. However, I am doing this for me. I just read your comment about 75% of bariatric patients end up divorced. That is scary. I am also doing this so I can get a hip replaced so I can keep traveling with my husband. He is also following a high Protein, low carb diet because it helps him feel better, especially with his joints. We both are in our 40's but feel like we are in our 80's! That is going to change for the better. 3 Orchids&Dragons, Frustr8 and dlturn reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kakatlady612 1,053 Posted January 29, 2018 Once upon a time I had a doctor ( not my Bariatric Surgeon,not even my current PCP) tell me: I'd like you to weigh 148 lbs. My answer: I would too but I don't see that it Will be happening without Bariatric Surgery. If wishing weight away would work none of us would be overweight.Sent from my VS880PP using BariatricPal mobile app 3 2 toodlerue, moondoggie1983, ausmith and 2 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
vanelifejourney 27 Posted January 30, 2018 Once upon a time I had a doctor ( not my Bariatric Surgeon,not even my current PCP) tell me: I'd like you to weigh 148 lbs. My answer: I would too but I don't see that it Will be happening without Bariatric Surgery. If wishing weight away would work none of us would be overweight.Sent from my VS880PP using BariatricPal mobile appI would also like to wish for the wining lotto numbers. I know money can’t buy happiness but it sure can by a chef to do all this meal prep we gotta do. I’m just saying.... 2 2 Orchids&Dragons, AceBlaque, Brassapple and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KatFight 207 Posted January 30, 2018 "The easy way," yes, that's the road I'd like to go down. When someone finds it, please let me know. 5 2 AceBlaque, habee, Orchids&Dragons and 4 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jessgnc 167 Posted January 30, 2018 UGH. I read your post and got irrationally mad. It's the reason I didn't tell most people about my surgery beforehand. I don't need your unsolicited opinion on how *I* should handle *MY* body. Maybe for them eating small portions and exercise worked. For me, I had a medical condition which wouldn't let my body lose weight. So despite eating right and exercising, it wasn't enough. Next, it isn't about being skinny. It is about being healthy. My body is a car. I want what is under the hood to work well so I can drive it around for years to come. If good maintenance results in a good looking exterior, awesome. But that isn't the main goal. Finally, f**k her for thinking it is the easy way out. The easy way out is doing nothing. The hard way is: * Accepting you need help. This one may sound easy but I know that for me, this was admitting that I couldn't handle this myself. It was admitting defeat. * Saving money for the doctor. Going to classes and education sessions for months to qualify for a major surgery. * Going on a strict diet prior to surgery. *Staying on a strict diet after surgery. *Staying on a strict diet and Vitamin routine for the rest of your life. So the "easy" way out is an insanely strict diet and major surgery to get a tool installed? Screw her. Sorry, you touched a nerve here. One of my husband's friends lived with us for about 6 months. He had gone from 350lbs to about 150 after getting diagnosed with type 2 Diabetes. How did he do this? He switched from drinking a 12 pack of regular soda daily to a 12 pack of diet soda. Seriously, that was it and the weight evaporated off of him. I had to live with 6 months of watching him drink a gallon of milk a day, 12+ sodas daily and nothing but fast food, while he'd preach to me about how easy it was to lose weight if I just put in some effort. Meanwhile, I was weighing all of my meals, not touching carbs (or soda) and working out with no results. 8 4 pleasedontjudgeme, LindyPablo, Orchids&Dragons and 9 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kakatlady612 1,053 Posted January 30, 2018 One of Bomshel ( a country girl duet) greatest hits is Karma is a Female Dog. I can only pray for all the naysayers to get theirs and get it in spades.Sent from my VS880PP using BariatricPal mobile app Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
vanelifejourney 27 Posted January 30, 2018 UGH. I read your post and got irrationally mad. It's the reason I didn't tell most people about my surgery beforehand. I don't need your unsolicited opinion on how *I* should handle *MY* body. Maybe for them eating small portions and exercise worked. For me, I had a medical condition which wouldn't let my body lose weight. So despite eating right and exercising, it wasn't enough. Next, it isn't about being skinny. It is about being healthy. My body is a car. I want what is under the hood to work well so I can drive it around for years to come. If good maintenance results in a good looking exterior, awesome. But that isn't the main goal. Finally, f**k her for thinking it is the easy way out. The easy way out is doing nothing. The hard way is: * Accepting you need help. This one may sound easy but I know that for me, this was admitting that I couldn't handle this myself. It was admitting defeat. * Saving money for the doctor. Going to classes and education sessions for months to qualify for a major surgery. * Going on a strict diet prior to surgery. *Staying on a strict diet after surgery. *Staying on a strict diet and Vitamin routine for the rest of your life. So the "easy" way out is an insanely strict diet and major surgery to get a tool installed? Screw her. Sorry, you touched a nerve here. One of my husband's friends lived with us for about 6 months. He had gone from 350lbs to about 150 after getting diagnosed with type 2 Diabetes. How did he do this? He switched from drinking a 12 pack of regular soda daily to a 12 pack of diet soda. Seriously, that was it and the weight evaporated off of him. I had to live with 6 months of watching him drink a gallon of milk a day, 12+ sodas daily and nothing but fast food, while he'd preach to me about how easy it was to lose weight if I just put in some effort. Meanwhile, I was weighing all of my meals, not touching carbs (or soda) and working out with no results. You spoke to my soul with this comment. Thank you! 3 Orchids&Dragons, Laura7 and pleasedontjudgeme reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrsGamgee 756 Posted February 1, 2018 On 2018-01-27 at 5:43 PM, vanelifejourney said: My rant goes: why the stigma of wls vs the natural way. I get so annoyed when I hear that statement. The perception that going the surgical route is not by any means the easy way to go. I spent a number of years struggling with infertility/recurrent pregnancy loss and the same stigma haunts that community too. The number of times I'd hear comments about 'natural' versus IVF/assisted reproductive therapies... I swear I'd want to strangle folks. People think that if something was easy for them, it automatically must be easy (natural) for everyone else. This is a medical situation that needs to be treated medically. 7 1 habee, toodlerue, Laura7 and 5 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites